well started the day i meet my huband my inlaws decided they didnt like me,i think as i had two children from previous marriage,we have one off r own now. they still dismiss me from there family do's or visits.my husband still takes our son and am sat waiting for him to come home. makes me feel sad as i've tryed so much to bring us together.my husband says his dad old school and wont change.my husband to happy to carry on that way.what would you do?
2006-07-21 13:40:32 · 17 answers · asked by caniave 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You can't change them. Accept this fact and work on having a good marriage and happy family.
2006-07-21 13:42:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hun I can really relate my EX husbands family did not care for me and I did not have any kids I was two years older than him and they I guess did not agree well we had two kids.I sat at home and he took the kids to all family do alls.It never changed.Now I am remarried and have a good relationship with my inlaws and my ex is remarried and they are still acting like that with his new wife and now they tell me they wish I was back in the family.But really I think it would still be the same.I hope things get better but your hubby needs to be the one who fixes things by saying she is coming or I will not be there or it is time to realize my wife is here to stay.
2006-07-21 13:47:39 · answer #2 · answered by sashaaspen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know that grandparents only have rights to grandchildren if the parents allow this.. I went to court over this before and the judge told my inlaws that they could see there grandchildren only if we let them!!! Also you hubby needs to step up here!! If he goes to another family outting don`t let him take the kids if he doesn`t step up!! This crap about to old and set in there ways is BS!!!! He needs to grow some balls and tell them that your his wife and if they don`t like it then they won`t see him or the grandkids... He needs to step up here!! If he doesn`t tell him child support will cost him more than hard feelings and get out of that marriage. Good Luck!!! Been there!!
2006-07-21 13:48:21 · answer #3 · answered by bren_jim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him and his family!!
Take your kids (all three) and RUN!! I know you had to have seen the train wreck before you said "I do". What were you thinking?
Move on, honey and take your losses on this one. Your hubby does not have your support and he goes to visit his family and takes his child with him and leave you and I guess your other two children at home???!!!
I would run away from those people or if you MUST stay, call Dr. Phil, he will straighten your hubby out.
2006-07-21 13:47:49 · answer #4 · answered by geminisista 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are his family...but once he married you, you became his primary family. He needs to grow some balls and inform his parents that if you aren't welcome at their functions then neither is he or their grandchild.
I'm sure there will be plenty of things like this said here....log on and show him this question and the answers in a day or so. If he doesn't get the hint, then tell him "either live with me, or go live with them...I'm thru being second in your life."
2006-07-21 13:45:48 · answer #5 · answered by jimmy h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Experience!!!!!!! Your husband needs to tell his family" This is the Woman I took to be my Wife. I promised to Love her all of my life! When we got married we became one if you can not love her because I do and if you can't except her into this family then you don't except me or my family. I Love her and she makes me happy and if you love me then you would love her for making me happy. So from this time on until you can except her in this family and love her then I am not in this family because we are not 2 we are 1!" They should Love you because you are the one that makes him happy. If they can not treat you with respect then he should not have anything to do with them until they can. When he took your hand in marriage you became one. You need to remind your husband of that. He needs to defend you and stand by your side and not let his family make you feel this way. Believe me I went through it for 16 years and counting.
I hope everything works out and good luck!
P.S. Remember you married him not his family and you don't have to put up with it!!!!!!
2006-07-21 13:53:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both need counseling . My family has never exceptedmy wife (or my brotherswife).I have had to speak up for my wife many times against my family. She has done nothing wrong. They just believe no one is good enough for their sons. Your husband needs to be a man and stand up for you. It is not easy but he should let them know you are his wife and they need to respect you.
2006-07-21 13:51:10 · answer #7 · answered by BUTCH 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change them but your husband should support you not them. It is not fair to you or the children involved. Talk to him, you should not feel left out in your own family.
2006-07-21 13:46:05 · answer #8 · answered by aprillillie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you've done all you can do by talking to him and your in-laws, I'd say some counseling for the two of you would be helpful. If he won't go, you still can. Even if you don't have insurance, there are agencies and church sponsored therapists that can help.
2006-07-21 13:44:58 · answer #9 · answered by Lisa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he needs to talk with his family about that. If they are putting you on the backburner everytime they have a get together then there is something wrong. He needs to step up and tell them if they cant accept you then they cant accept him.
2006-07-21 13:43:45 · answer #10 · answered by angelblueyes200 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋