Answer if you are going to give me a REAL ANSWER:What's WRONG with me??

Question

Okay, this is going to be hard to explain but bear with me. It may also be weird.Anyway,I have problems with being affectionate. Whenever I am in a relationship, I feel like if I am affectionate with my boyfriend, he'll go tell his friends about it. If I am not in a relationship and I go on vacation or something and I meet someone hot, I can be affectionate (especially when I am drunk) but it's just a one time thing and I never see them again. Therefore most of my relationships don't last too long. What's wrong with me?I mean I used to be really affectionate until these last few years. I'd rather not be touched anymore..

Note: Don't say anything stupid like I am gay because I am 100% straight.

Answer 1

Sounds like you're not the one with the problem. You've got to find a mature guy who won't "kiss and tell." Once you feel secure with someone you will naturally be affectionate. I believe that there is someone out there for everyone. Good luck.

Answer 2

It sounds to me like a guy might have done something to hurt you or went a little to far at some point while you were drunk,or maybe even not while you were drunk,most women have a defense mechanism that makes us this way when we have been hurt mentally or physically,or some people if they have been in a long relationship just get bored.As for getting friskier while drunk,ALOT of people are this way because as you know alcohol loosens people up,sometimes too much.I used to do the same things you are doing until I found someone who makes me want to be affectionate and doesn't pressure me to do anything,another thing is you could be getting older and you're not the kissy smoochy type anymore and there's nothing wrong with that..who wants to be slobbered on all the time anyway!!??!You might just need a boyfriend that's not pressuring you to be so affectionate,or talk to the one you have now about how you feel or a close friend then maybe you can figure out what the real problem is on your own.

Answer 3

Why does the thought of someone telling their friends about you being affectionate trouble you so? What would be the harm? It's either affectionate or frigid...why worry about what others say or think? You don't answer to them...

What happened, to cause you to change? You say you used to be affectionate...apparently an event or events occured to cause you to completely shy away from it...bad experience? someone say ugly or untrue things about you?

Perhaps you should talk to a counselor if you cannot get to the root of this issue yourself...it will prevent you from havinng anything other than short term relationships until you take some action...

Good luck!

Answer 4

Nothing is wrong with you. People change. I have family members and friends that don't like to be touched or be affectionate. If you are truly unhappy then maybe see a shrink. Also try to locate exactly what happened when you stopped being affectionate. Find it and fix it if u can.

Answer 5

I think that since you've been scarred in the past, you've decided to stop the pain by just not allowing anything to happen anymore.

I think you need to realize that you should be who you are. If you're affectionate, be affectionate but also be aware that there are guys out there who would love to take advantage of it. Just hold back a little, not completely. Not all guys out there are assholes though it seems like it.

Answer 6

well have you've been hurt be-4 cause some girls don't like 2 B in a affectionate relationships because they were hurt so were u if not then i guess u like 2 be by yourself and have fun with out having someone holding u back just like me it's OK nothing wrong with u

Answer 7

Hmm...maybe you are a little paranoid about what your boyfriend might be saying to his friends. Maybe it affects you psychologically, and you retain you affection out of fear of being another story. That would be a bad thing if you were just a story to his friends. Maybe there are some trust issues? Maybe if you have a boyfriend, you should be more open and talk about it. Ask him not to tell his friends...if he truly likes you, he wont...except maybe his best friend or something. But try being more open and talk about how you feel. That will probably make a big difference for you.

Answer 8

I would have to say you saw/ or even heard about someone having a similar situation where the boyfriend was talking **** about the gf to his friends, saying she is all over me or I got her wrapped around my finger... and it tramaized you, I'm guessing you have to think about 3 or 4 years ago to remember what happened... When someone is drunk, they start to act just how they want to, because their minds sortof shut off for a while and you don't hink about what others would say or think, you become uncaring and thats how you really want to be in a relationship. You want to be affectionate and not care what everyone else says about you or your partner when cuddling. Ever girl wants to be hugged or kissed on the forehead or mouth.
Or just maybe your just going through a stage, that your tired of relationships and just want to have flings, thats all normal anyway.... Your not weird... your not strnage,.... Your just human!!!

Answer 9

YOU MAY HAVE GROWN UP WITH OUT BOTH PARENTS. THAT WILL AFFECT YOU NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TELL YOURSELF YOU ARE TURNING OUT JUST FINE. RIGHT!!!????


IT'S A PSYCHOLOGICAL THING AND THE BEST THING IS TO TALK ABOUT IT.

IT'S EASIER TO NOT HAVE TO FACE THEM AFTER HAVING A VERY GOOD TIME. BECAUSE, YOU FEEL YOU HAVE TO LIVE UP TO THAT AT ALL TIMES AND IT'S JUST NOT POSSIBLE FOR ALL GIRLS OR WOMEN TO DO THIS.

THIS ALSO, MIGHT BE THE CASE. BAD RELATIONSHIPS IN THE PAST.MAYBE IN THE FIRST FEW YOU WERE THE AFFECTIONATE ONE AND GOT BURNED. THAT WILL CAUSE YOU TO BE STANDOFFISH IN THESE OTHER RELATIONSHIPS. OR ALL THESE SITUATIONS COULD BE AFFECTING YOU. YOU WILL STILL NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT IT. HOPE THIS MADE SENSE AND HELPS. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 10

You have trust issues. Talk to a therapist about it, or wait until you meet someone that you can let your guard down with. It will be very hard and you may get hurt, but if you never are able to let those walls down and give more than a one-nighter to, then you won't really have a healthy, fulfilling relationship.