I am a virgin b choice because i want to know its right i take this beig step, but, i've been talking to this guy for a while and he asked me about sex and when i told him about me being a virgin he started rattling off about how he was 22, i'm 17 but i'll be 18 in a few months, and he expected sex to be part of his life. This has happened several times before and it's not like i blurt out "I'm a virgin" the first time we speak but if they ask i will be honest about it. Why do they freak out so much? Its not like i'm asking them to take it right then. I really liked this guy but he hasn't really spoken to me since the conversation. I don't think i did wrong by telling him and explaining to him that even though i could've had sex i chose not to because so many girls lose their virginity and it means nothing. I want my first time to mean something. If anyone has any helpful advice that would be greatly appreciated. I don't want to have to be ashamed of being a virgin or lie to get a date
2006-07-21 06:05:55 · 38 answers · asked by I'm better than you 4 in Health ➔ Women's Health
Be proud of who you are!
I didn't wait until marriage, but I did wait until I was with someone special who I cared a lot about. Because my first sexual relationship was a beautiful thing I am very secure and comfortable now in my sexuality. Many of my friends had bad experiences early on and unfortunately they have many insecurites about their sexuality and have many hang ups about sex.
If that boy (and yes, at 22 and acting like that - he's still a boy) isn't interested in you b/c he can't have a casual sexual relationship with you then you don't need him. I hope you see that! You'll meet a man who will recognize the value of your decisions and respect you all the more for it. Have faith!
2006-07-21 06:13:04 · answer #1 · answered by Miss. A. Laneous 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Simply put he was not the right guy for you. He is also 22 years old and you are 17. Had you just had sex with him do you think he would have stuck around or cared for you? At least you found out what kind of guy he is before anything happened.
Be true to yourself and you have answered your own question saying you are a virgin by choice because you want sex to be meaningful. Never be ashamed of standing up for yourself.
The right guy will come along that is into who you are and not just sex.
2006-07-21 06:15:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are absolutely right about holding on to your virginity. Sex is only part of a true relationship. You have to have love, and a bond with your partner for a relationship to last. Keep looking for the guy that doesn't get squeamish when you tell him your a virgin, because he will be the one that likes you for who you are, not for the 2 minutes he can use whats between your legs. In life you will spend the majority of your time NOT having sex, so make sure the person you choose has common intrest and goals outside the bedroom. My daughter is 19, is still a virgin according to her and her mother. She has seen too many friends get pregnant and not finish college to chance ruining the rest of her life for 5 minutes of possible pleasure.
2006-07-21 06:16:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON'T GIVE IN TO PEER PRESSURE. Sex loses its appeal and value if you give it away too easily. You should wait until you are ready. The "right" guy will love you for who you are, not for what you can do for him. The difference between love and lust is give and take.
Sex can result in disease or pregnancy, so make sure you understand "safe-sex" and have a thought in your head about what you would do if you did get pregnant.
Ultimately though, sex is easy... its physically satisfying (most of the time), but relationships and love are much harder to deal with. By waiting, you are going to have a better perception of what you want from a guy and from life. You'll appreciate your choices more.
I gave up my virginity to a stranger just so I could say I wasn't a virgin. As much as I love the intimacy of a physical relationship, I think I would have been better off waiting for the right person.
Be true to yourself.
2006-07-21 06:13:14 · answer #4 · answered by Sir Greggath 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if I'd tell a guy that I was a virgin until or unless I was sure that he's the right one. A lot of guys take it the wrong way, but that just tells you what kind of guy you're dealing with. If you're asked again, tell them that it's not even the time to have that conversation. You don't have to lie or feel bad about a decision that you've made for yourself. If they don't respect your choices, then how can they ever respect you.
2006-07-21 06:12:26 · answer #5 · answered by Babydreads 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear about your boyfriend. But if he loves you he should respect you. If he loves you he should be able to wait. He should be supportive. If not, than he doesn't love you and doesn't deserve to be with someone like you who is pure and have higher standards than most of the girls your age nowadays. You have sex when you are ready. You decide for yourself, okay?! You don't have to be ashamed for still being a virgin. You should be proud that you still are and that no one has touched you yet and left you. You don't have to lie to get a date. If a guy doesn't want you because your virgin, then he's dumb. Keep moving. He's not for you.
2006-07-21 06:13:50 · answer #6 · answered by Natalie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did everything right. This guy just wanted to get laid. Your better off being honest at the right time. If the guy cant handle it, then he is just a perv. You are only 17. Wait to find the guy that sticks around after telling him this. He will likely be a better person. But, watch out. Some guys like the challenge and want to just get virgins and then dump them. So be careful.
2006-07-21 06:11:35 · answer #7 · answered by chris42050 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are plenty of men who would respect your decision to not have sex, and those are the kind of guys you want to be dating. Any man who cannot respect you enough to allow you to make decisions about YOUR body, can go to hell and you don't need to be dating him. Don't let someone rob you of being truly ready for your first time just because they think you should "put out". Don't be ashamed of your decisions, be proud that you've made a decision and have stuck with it, regardless of what other people think. I know that I lost my virginity farr too early, and now that I'm getting married in two weeks, I really regret not saving my virginity for someone really special instead of just throwing it away, and I don't want you to regret having sex either!
2006-07-21 06:11:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are making a great choice to be a virgin. That's something that you'll never regret! Don't let this guy push you into having sex.. wait until you're married! So far you're doing great. And you shouldn't be ashamed of being a virgin, you should be proud of yourself! If this guy is gonna make you feel ashamed of your choice, then he doesn't deserve you! To me it sounds like all he really wants is your sex... if I were you, I'd let him go. Good luck!!
p.s. you'll find a guy that won't make you feel ashamed of being a virgin... just wait!!
2006-07-21 06:09:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was a virgin until I was 28 honey so I know how you feel. Any man who would not be with you because of your beliefs is not worth the time nor effort you put forth to be with him. A person who is in love will wait until you both are ready. Do NOT give the most precious gift to anyone until you are sure that person is for real and loves you.
2006-07-21 06:11:58 · answer #10 · answered by betterbegood_to_me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋