What does everybody think of this:?

Question

Same-sex marriage pioneers separate

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060721/ap_on_re_us/gay_marriage_separation

It was on Yahoo News this morning!

BOSTON - The lesbian couple whose lawsuit led to legal same-sex marriage in Massachusetts have announced they have separated.

"Julie and Hillary Goodridge are amicably living apart," Mary Breslauer, a local political consultant, said Thursday night on their behalf. Breslauer declined to comment on how long they had been separated or whether the couple planned to divorce.

The Goodridges were among seven gay couples whose lawsuit helped thrust Massachusetts into the center of a nationwide debate on gay marriage. The state's Supreme Judicial Court issued its narrow 4-3 ruling in November 2003 in their favor — saying gays and lesbians had a right under the state constitution to wed.

The Goodridges were married May 17, 2004, the first day same-sex marriages became legal under the court ruling, by a Unitarian Universalist minister. Their daughter, Annie, now 10, served as ring-bearer and flower girl.

Now, Breslauer said, for Annie's sake, the Goodridges want privacy.

The child figured prominently in the Goodridges' case. When Julie Goodridge gave birth by cesarean section, there were complications. Hillary Goodridge, at the time having no legal relationship with mother or child, said she was barred several times from seeing her daughter and partner.

"Even though their number one priority was their daughter," Breslauer said, "marriage makes her also their legal obligation. Their daughter is more protected because they are married."

Julie Goodridge declined to comment, saying Breslauer was the family's acting spokeswoman. Hillary Goodridge did not return a telephone message left at a business listing Thursday night.

Answer 1

WHO CARES . . .

It's not news (wish the media would wize up) Darfur is news.

It's never going to be news (like who cares if my neighbors break up)

It's not MY business (feels like the media wants to support all the crazy peeping toms and accident gawkers)

People need to stop enjoying wallowing in other peoples misery - it's rally bad karma

Where is the compassion for these people who really are so alienated from the mainstream. It has to be very painfull to not fit in, not to have basic HUMAN rights to love and cherish and honor each other. Adding insult to injury, some folks want to pillory them.

I say - go mind your life, your happiness, your bliss, your inspiration and your business and lend a hand to someone less fortunate.

Answer 2

I think it's unfortunate that the media is making such an issue, it's only going to feed the fire for those who oppose gay marriage. The only thing that this REALLY says (to me anyway) is that the Goodridges are human, and human beings aren't perfect. Just because they had to fight so hard to receive the right that every person should have, didn't mean that they would stay together forever. Ideally that's the way it works out but, relationships, whether gay, bi or straight just end sometimes, period, that's life. I realize that in filing the lawsuit in the first place, they made their lives public, but why do they have to hounded during such a painful time?

Answer 3

I think all the "Pro-Gay marriage" related answers here are correct and well put. I also agree that it's sad that the Religious Reight will most likely use this and other "Gay marriages that end in divorce" tales in their spin doctored pundit propaganda to the general public as the citizens in Massachusetts go to the poles later this year to vote on whether or not the Gay marriages law should be repealed.
The way I see it at this time, is that if every Gay and Transgendered person in that state showed up to vote in support of Pro-Gay marriages, it might only prove to negate the Anti-Gay marriage votes accumulated by the Religious Reight. Therefore the deciding factor of votes that will be in favor of the Gay Marriage Law and continue to keep it on the books will come from the Non-religious Right Heterosexual community.
It is indeed a rather sad thing that the law has to be voted on by the general public to keep it ratified. Frankly, it has no business being on the ballot in my honest opinion. Gay marriages should be here to stay for good, both in that state and the rest of the United States.

Answer 4

Half of all marriage in the US end in divorce, I guess gay people are no different. Thankfully these two women were legally married in Massachusetts, so their children's rights will be preserved by the law and the courts. Had they been simply a cohabitation couple, as they would be in 48 other states in the Union, the kids might totally lose the right to see one mother or the other, and have no inheritance rights from that other parent, etc. Thank God for Massachusetts

Answer 5

What's to think? Sure, they were pioneers, and yes, made a huge difference to the right to marry stance.

However, they are human and should be allowed to be such. Would it have been better for them to stay together for form's sake, so that it wouldn't be an "embarrasment" to the GLBT community? Should they have stayed together, even though it might have harmed their daughter emotionally? (NEVER stay together "just for the children"!)

The problem today is that everybody is so busy looking for heroes, they don't forgive if they feel that their heroes let them down.

Straight folks get married and divorced every day. For good and bad reasons. We, in the GLBT community are just as human....and if legal marriage is granted across the board, we will probably do the same.

People change, love grows and dies. For some, the love stays forever. For some

Answer 6

I think that it reflects the similarness between gay and straight couples. 50% of all straight marriages end in divorce. An additional fraction, though I don't know how large, ends up with what amounts to effective permanent separation. Many of those who stay together live separate lives and share a house -- particularly after the children are gone -- often with no emotional connection at all. The rest, significantly less than half, perhaps no more than 20% have actual life long committed and functional relationships.

Why would gay couples be different?

Any of our friends, straight or gay -- even, frankly, fundamentalists who are acquainted with us and disapprove -- would admit, and have said, that we (Jonathan and I) are the most successful couple they know. It is true, we are a successful couple, we love each other after almost 15 years, we still have regular sex, we accommodate one another's needs and we allow for one another's foibles. We have argued with raised voices less than 5 times in 15 years --- still, shouldn't MOST couples be able to say that? They can't -- gay, straight or other.

I expected that there would be separations among the newly married gay couples. I expect that there will be divorces. It's part of life. It would be nice if our percentages were lower -- but I don't expect it -- people are people, and most people are self-centered. Someone has to elect in any relationship to be the one ultimately willing to subordinate him or herself after the discussion is done -- if the other one won't. It has to be a conscious decision, and it has to be done in every relationship. Traditionally in straight marriage it has been the woman. For the relationship to also be healthy you have to be able to do it without bitterness, recrimination or rancor -- otherwise you have to be ready to separate.

Fewer people these days are so willing.

*shrug*

As I said, its the way people are.

Regards,

Reynolds Jones
http://www.rebuff.org
[e-mail]

Answer 7

In reality, it shows gay marriage is the same across the board, whether it be opposite genders, mixed races, different religions, whatever. However, this will definitely be fuel for the fire under the conservatives and moral majorities caldron pot.

Answer 8

Just goes to show that same-sex couples really are the same as opposite-sex couples. They're not undermining marriage, they just have problems, just like everybody else.

Answer 9

I think that it shows that even same-sex marriages can last and fizzle just like regular straight marriage. It also shows that marriage shouldn't be defined just by one way.

Answer 10

Lesbian couples split just like hetero,gay,bi,or tg couples,doesn't mean anything,really