When I met him this girl "his friend" was like "oh he's so gay" but everytime we are together, he does not act like it. He talks about ex girlfriends, and future wife ect.... But maybe some of the comments he makes I wouldn't expect from a straight guy, like " talking about a celebrity being bisexual, and then trying to convince" We have been friends for about 5 mo and gotten really close, but I feel like I should have said something from the beginning. I tried to like there were these guys staring @ me and he said something. Im like No, they're staring @ you. And he cussed me out, so I was thinking he might jus tbe a feminine male?? It really doesnt matter but........I just feel it is wrong to decieve in relationships, say for instance he becomes involved with a female, but is bi and messing with guys. That is WRONG if he is not letting both know up front. Also I never asked him anything about that or even felt like that was an issue to us being friends
2006-07-21 03:07:29 · 17 answers · asked by she 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
If he is a good friend he wont be bothered if you ask him right out.
2006-07-21 03:10:29 · answer #1 · answered by pistolpete797@yahoo.com 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not confront him on his sexuality. He may still be trying to figure it out for himself and not sure what his orientation is. It is hard enough coming out to yourself, but to have someone call you out on it before you are even comfortable with it yourself, is a horrifying experience. This is all part of the coming out process.
Since he is the only one responsible for his actions, he will be the one held accountable if he is dating a girl, but messing around with guys.
If you do catch him first hand messing around with a guy and he is dating a girl, by all means, you have the right to talk to him. However, if you don't know for sure, tread carefully. Otherwise, you may damage the friendship you have developed.
What can you do right now? If he is important to you, you can passively show your support of the gay community. If you know other gay people, invite them to gatherings or dinners, go to gay pride parades, events, etc. Not that you have to base your whole social life around this, but mix it in here and there. Eventually, your friend may feel comfortable to talk to you about what he is going through.
Most important of all, let him approach you about it and if he doesn't, then he doesn't.
Live and let live.
Good luck!
2006-07-21 04:49:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are just friends, his sexual orientation is his own business - unless he chooses to tell you. It's not an issue to your being friends so don't dwell on it.
If ever you catch him cheating on his girlfriend - you should sound off on him. Doesn't matter whether it's with another girl or a guy.
Whatever he is, though, ask yourself if you're the sort of friend that'll love him for the friend he is. Once you've answered that, the rest is immaterial.
2006-07-21 03:31:39 · answer #3 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well... you did not say that he was a good friend.. a dear friend or just a friend as an acquaintance.. that all would make a difference. If he was a DEAR friend..then you would probably know already. Could just ask.. Did you ever have gay thoughts?.... or Have you ever been with a gay guy? You could arrange for YOU to meet with a handsome dude and ask your friend over to your table(or wherever) and see if his eyes ROAM on the cute guy
2006-07-21 04:12:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should bring something up, then ask your question. but your friend sounds just like me. I'm bi, and straight acting, but there are things that I do that come across as somewhat girly.
2006-07-21 07:04:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait until he is ready to tell, and if sometime you feel you should ask well ask in a nice way in which your not going to judge him in any way.
2006-07-24 12:34:28 · answer #6 · answered by Manny_T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want to know? Just let him live his life. We need to learn to keep to ourselves and let our friends do the same.
2006-07-21 03:13:51 · answer #7 · answered by Linda 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's your friend,what do you care unless you want to be more than friends with him....let it go,and be glad you've got a nice friend,who cares who he sleeps with
2006-07-21 05:52:10 · answer #8 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's not sure, either. Tell him that it's okay with you, whatever he is, and he may feel more comfortable to be honest with you and with himself.
2006-07-21 03:12:14 · answer #9 · answered by T Time 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF YOU ARE A TRUE FRIEND you wont be bothered by what he is.
Why put a label on him?
2006-07-21 03:14:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋