I am 23 my bf 37 i want kids and he's not ready.
When are you ever ready for kids? what should i do... He knew i wanted kids... He told me he's selfish and dont want to give up anything. I gave up everything for him i left my home country (south-africa) my friends and family to be with him in the states
Some advise please... we been together for a year. know him all together for 3 years
what should i do
2006-07-21 02:51:41 · 7 answers · asked by bcb 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i got pregnant when i first got here 8 months ago but he let me get an aborstion...even when i decided against it
2006-07-21 02:52:27 · update #1
Drop him and move on. If he doesn't want kids now, he most likely never will. There are plenty of good loving men that want children. You are young, continue to look.
2006-07-21 02:54:55 · answer #1 · answered by Mommymonster 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're never really "ready" for kids. If he's 37 and still not ready, it doesn't look likely that he ever will be. Does he give u hope that he might want some in the future? If so, and he's a good guy, then maybe u should give him more time. Just let him know you're not willing to wait too long. But you are young! I'm 33 and just started having my family 2 yrs. ago. (I waited until I found the right man) You have plenty of time in your future, but if you're man NEVER wants kids, then u need to stop wasting time. There are LOTS of men that would love to. A good theory on that is "I never heard anyone say they regreted having kids, but I've heard lots of people say they regreted NOT having any"! Be open with your BF, and give him time if that's what he needs, but also let him know, you cant watch your whole life go by and give up this dream. Funny as it may seem, the selfish men usually make the best Dads. Having children is a life changing experience! Good luck, I hope things work out for you.
2006-07-21 10:08:18 · answer #2 · answered by Jenintn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sad just by reading your story and that you gave up a lot for him and he don't want to give you a child. I'm wondering if there were not signs before that such would be the response from him ?
There is no easy answer to your situation as your feelings are on the line. What you can do is to talk to him and if there is no change let this be your guide as what to do.
Are you working in the States or a house wife ?
2006-07-21 10:00:24 · answer #3 · answered by Premio 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being an Indian, I may not understand the relationship you have with your friend. Definitely he is not a "boy" friend anymore!!If its a temporary affair, please leave him and mend for yourself(or go back to Sth Africa).
Your ages have crossed the "macho" age and the time for procreation is a little overdue!!
2006-07-21 10:00:09 · answer #4 · answered by THE WORRIER 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is that selfish..you should move on..thank him for opening your eyes before it is too late... He is 37 and set in his ways and it wont get any better!!!! Follow you gut instinct.
2006-07-21 10:01:10 · answer #5 · answered by jh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out there and find someone who deserves u babe. he's going to b old and wrinkly soon anyway and whilst he is u could be enjoying a family with someone else.
Good luck
2006-07-21 09:56:56 · answer #6 · answered by ???????????? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him if he loves you he'll give you a child....
2006-07-21 09:56:44 · answer #7 · answered by Sandra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋