My husband's ex-wife refuses to change her surname. Problem is that she has added his first name and last name as her surname. We live in the UK. Can we take a legal action against her?
2006-07-21 02:01:45 · 13 answers · asked by P P 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am an ex-wife and I use the last name of my ex-husband not because I want to but to avoid further complication for our daughter.
There was a time she asked me why I have a different last name from her - There was a time we traveled had to bring all those documents to prove that I am the mother because we have different last name.
Without meaning to be offensive - there was a time the school questioned me if I am the guardian or the mother since I am using my maiden name.
Are there kids involve? Why take legal action - not unless it was part of the decree that she reverts back to her maiden name.
2006-07-21 02:10:11 · answer #1 · answered by Azil-em 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you feel, and wonder what satisfaction she may gain from this--but I can tell you that I have been in your shoes to a degree. First of all, when I divorced, to change my name on the unknown quantity of documents required a tower of strength that I did not have at that time! All this work and expense is up to the woman! Does not seem fair.
Then when I remarried, the EX kept his last name, and even upon being asked to change it at the attorney's negotiation table, she refused to do it. Well, considering that she is a school teacher and would have to face up to all her students and ADVERTISE her failed 3rd marriage relationship., that made me cut her some slack in my mind--so I just ignored it.
I am stilll confused as her is some local shops, the cleaners, the plumber, the library, the vet, the dentist and all the places that she was once on file with him...but they are kindly set clear and we are all operating peacefully on the same few square miles of Planet Earth--and she is still spinning!!!
Honey, life does go on, let go and just be happy, that is your best course of action!
2006-07-21 09:15:56 · answer #2 · answered by susieque 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If in your new marriage the only thing you have that bothers you is that the ex wife kept the name, let it go. My guess is that when she lets go of the past and is ready to move forward in her life she will take back her maiden name, until then I don't think there is much you can do. Try not to let it bother you. Maybe most people know her by this name and its hard to pass on the change to everyone w/out having to go thru the whole mess.
2006-07-21 09:13:52 · answer #3 · answered by flowerandkevin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a weirdo. But like someone said, a lot of mothers keep the old name for the kids. It just makes life easier on that front. And then there are all the things you would have to change. If it's not that, then just think of how unhappy her life must be to not let that go. That should be punishment enough.
2006-07-21 09:22:24 · answer #4 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you worry about what name she uses? When you married him I assume you knew there was a previous MRS. Right?
I say leave the name deal alone. She earned his last name..or is it because you want to "erase" proof that there was someone before you?
Time to get over it..you and your hubby. The ex earned the right to have his last name for as long as she wants. If hes griping now..maybe he should have been more choosey from the start ;-)
Best wishes.
2006-07-21 12:02:27 · answer #5 · answered by AccountableLady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is his ex-wife, leave it at that. Why give her the satisfaction of fighting her over this. You are his wife, ignore her. If you give this too much attention, she will continue to have some sort of power over you and your husband. What can she do with his name anyway? Legally there is nothing she can do, they are divorced and he should have papers proving this. You have all the legalities in this relationship, you are now his wife.
2006-07-21 09:08:35 · answer #6 · answered by BluePassion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate my maiden name. When I divorce I am going to keep my married name. It will save trouble for my son as well. I have had his name for the last 20 years, do not want to go through the hassle of changing it back again.
There is no law about going back to the maiden name.
2006-07-21 10:33:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give the lady a break and get on with your life, for goodness sake!
There's probably a thousand people out there with the same surname too (less the firstname), why let it bug you?
2006-07-21 09:10:18 · answer #8 · answered by Son of Gap 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave her alone, why do you care? Maybe she doesn't feel like the hassle of name change again. Who are you? the name police. You got her man let her keep her name. I hope the next wife makes you change your name. Weirdo.
2006-07-21 09:07:33 · answer #9 · answered by ticklefoot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget it....it's not worth the trouble. You're playing right into her hand and doing exactly what she wants you to do...get your panties in a wad! Act like it doesn't matter to you one way or another.
2006-07-21 09:28:54 · answer #10 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋