How do I accept his decsion and move on?

Question

First of all, please don't criticize me. I have heard it all, thought it all and I just need help letting go.

I had been part of love triangle for over a year. I was married when I met my married boyfriend. I divorced and he refused to sign his separation papers. His wife knew about me, and she tried to end things for him and tried to get me to back off.

The man went back and forth between the 2 of us and we both allowed it to happen. Both of us were willing to overlook his faults and cherished every day we had with him.

I do believe I pushed him back to his wife. I wasn't supportive of our relationship and constantly asked if he wanted to go home. I told him that people don't give up. Did I secretly want him to leave?

Well, he left here last week saying he loved me, etc. and we talked about our future. I haven't heard from him in over a week, so I assume he's home now. I won't call him there but I wanted closure. How can I just let go and accept it?

Answer 1

well you need to move on and stop thinking about it

Answer 2

Ouch, okay I won't criticize you. First off you need to realize you deserve a man who is completely committed to you. Believe me when I say if a man tells you his wife doesn't understand him, before too long he'll say the same thing about you to someone else in the near future.

Second, very few people in this world acutualy find "closure". You have to create your own closure in your own way WITHOUT contacting him. Start a new hobby, join a health club, get together with a girlfriend and watch movies or something. Yes, you will feel like your heart is breaking and it will hurt like hell. In time he won't be the first person you think of in the morning, and a while after that it will hurt less and less.

Please don't forget that you are worth a man that is with you and only you. That can give himself to you 100%. Not someone who is married or dating someone else.

Answer 3

This man was never yours in the beginning so leaving him to sort his marriage out is the best thing you can do.
You have messed up your own marriage and dont really seem bothered by this so you dont really have an option other than to forget this as a silly affair.
Mixing with married men/women is always a gamble and most of the time the secret lover always takes a backseat in the relationship.
If you havent heard from this man then hes probably gone back to his family and trying to forget about you,i suggest you do the same.

Answer 4

The only way you can let that sucker go is to realize that you deserve someone who devotes themselves completely to you and only you. You deserve happiness. As for constantly asking if he wants to go home, that's probably just you trying to make it easier on yourself-by letting him go instead of the reverse. Keep trying. Everyone finds someone, right one or not. While I do not doubt he loves you or cares for you quite strongly to stay with you, it is painfully obvious that his love isn't enough to take the steps necessary to be yours alone. Ditch him before it is almost impossible to do so! I'm rooting for you. Don't wait for closure. The truth is that we never get it and the reasons we get just reopen the wound. MOVE ON!!!

Answer 5

The Trinity isn't interior the Bible, it truly is a doctrine of techniques a courting of God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit are in courting with each and every and each and every. i imagine interior the Trinity, even with the certainty that it truly isn't any longer the distinguishing mark of a Christian. To be a Christian, is to maintain on with the training of Jesus and to have self theory in him. OR as some Christians say is to be Christ Like. i do no longer understand the position you heard this yet they're incorrect. It does help to have a a lot more effective coaching of the bible to have a good time with the Trinity in spite of the easy incontrovertible certainty that, yet it quite is yet another tale.

Answer 6

First of all you are wasting your time. Since the man is married he obviously has no desire to build a quality relationship. If you persue a relationship with him you will be blocking the way to a more honest and abiding relationship with someone free to love you.

Move on girl! Find out what it is like to be Number One in someones life...

Answer 7

Letting go when you truly love someone is a very hard process.When it's wrong to love this person because he loves someone else its even harder.I suggest you change your number and your address if you can just change your whole familiar enviorment and start over,take it day by day and God will lead you in the right direction!!!! Sometimes we have to move from our comfort zone to find a new beginning!!!

Answer 8

Get counseling/therapy on why you would allow yourself all that pain. This will help you to let go. You need to start a new life. You deserve better, and you won't get it until you believe it. When the pain you now live in becomes greater than the fear of change, your life will get better.

Answer 9

i dont know the circumstances involved like where there kids etc.
but you need to call him for closure maybe his wife gave him a guilt trip etc,the same thing happend with myself and my husband only I didnt know about the other woman however I dont think It will work with them or you if hes that torn and cant decide who to be with he may just move on and be alone.but if you need closure call him.after my husband came home I was sorry he did our marrige has never been the same.

Answer 10

I feel so bad for the spouses. You say not to be critical of you? Why not? You're a disgusting person to cheat. I don't feel sorry for you. If anything, you need to grow up and mature. I hope no one else makes the horrible mistake to be with you - as you can't be trusted.

Answer 11

Hi sweetiee..

The truth is its so hard to let go ... I been there and no matter who and how many times they would remind me that i could do better and to move on or to let go i didnt listen... My mistake was i never sat and thought about Me... It was all about him.. " he who loves you will never hurt you" and that is true ... try to moe on.. and ask GOD to heal ur pain and to give you a fresh memory.. I wil pray for you and if u have any questions please emial me at [e-mail]