How do you deal with people who are so ignorant?

Question

I live in a small market town in Scotland....I have lived here for 10 years now. Can't seem to get out of the place. The town is clean and well cared for but the people are so bloody ignorant. If you walk down the street they feel that it is their right to shout abuse at you or make personal comments. I have to say it has never happened to me because I would turn on them but my son and daughter can't go out without someone starting on them.

They shout abuse at everyone....not just at us.... each other as well. They don't say hello they say Hey Wanker or Hey *****!

My daughter who has no confidence whatsoever, was started on by four different people. She was walking home from her friend's house. One of the individuals was 30+ year old who called her a minger. She didn't know her but felt it was OK to do this. My explanation for these people is that they are small minded. It is a farming community and most of them are not too smart. A lot of them are fat and dumpy and I think they have a go at my kids because they are different.

Answer 1

try to instruct yoru children to be above them. if people yell things, keep walking. it will be a tough life, but in the end, that strength and indifference to ignorance will prove to be useful, and will make your children have formidable minds when they grow up.

a good thing to say is, "the reason why they yell is that there is a difference between us and them. we are better because we don't have to point out their shortcomings while we walk past. they just have to compensate for all the qualities they lack"

Answer 2

If your going to stay there longer then you should do something about it. If you have time on your hands why don't you start off by finding someone who thinks the same as you. Start a group which holds regular meetings where you teach people about public etiquette and the way the world is changing. Don't make it sound fancy because based on what you say I think your town would shun anything which is fancy or the likes.

Start off by talking to your local vicar or priest and ask him to talk about it in church, that has a lot of impact. You must be patient, slow and resolute about this. People will, I'm sure, initially reject it because small towns always hate change. Start with the women as men are more stubborn about change than women, and the women can always bully their men bout it :D. Tell them how such behavior affects the children and their own behavior in the future. bring it up in the PTA meetings.

Give out fliers with information about public behavior. Have your children and their friends, if the parents allow it, start stuff like politeness week etc. Talk to your mayor too...making it official always gives it more weight. Talk to the teachers at school, I'm sure they'll understand.

But of one thing you must be aware. This will take a long time to really work but it will work, only slowly.
Make this project simple, uncomplicated and fun which will appeal to everyone.

Answer 3

That's a long answer, but keep practicing until you get it figured out, because you'll be doing it your whole life so you might as well get good at it.

You son and daughter, on the other hand, might be too young to handle such abuse. And that's what it is. If you can, you might consider packing up and moving, for their sake.

Another option, though, is to become the friend of someone who is widely respected in that small market town. Their influence will win you peace and quiet.

Answer 4

Why are they shouting abuse at your children???

Is it the same person every time that shouts at them??

Why do people have to be prejudice just because for whatever reason you are different to them??

I get comments because of my size... I used to get upset but I have now got a string of responses to whatever anyone can throw at me - yes I get upset but it doesn't make me want to move.

Wherever you go you will get some ignoramus having a go....

Tell your kids to hold their heads up high. Tell them to smile. If the abuser sees that it's not affecting them perhaps they will stop.

You and your children are better than the person who is hurling abuse. The abuser is a loser.......

Good Luck and I hope I've helped in some way.

Answer 5

Namaskar.
Sorry to hear your predicament, unfortunately most people of foreign origin go through with abuse.
Indian people are the coolest race on earth. Ask the children to stay cool, help them to get good quality qualification and move from morally corrupt dump. It's like this all over UK.
They don't know that India is going to be the third richest country in the world by 2050, China, USA, India in that order. Our children can walk holding their head high. Wish you and your children Happiness.

Answer 6

You must show your children the way adults do things, and that the world is not a playground where these bullies rule. Since the ignorants are clearly just that, school playground bullies, big enough to pick on children ONLY.
So, how do adults hande this, simple they call the police.
Escort your children a few times, have them identify the thugs.
YOU confront them saying that they WILL STOP or be reported.

Do it calmly, firmly, leaving no room for doubt that you will do what you say.

These are childish bullies, they will quit.

Answer 7

Small minded people live everywhere not just in small market towns sad to say. It is a world over complaint. Not easy to ignore such but it annoys ignorant people more. Such racial ignorance is a lack of understanding and a sign that these people lack confidence in themselves and their own culture - feel sorry that they live such dull lives and meanwhile carry on with your lives and be glad you have a close knit family close to hand.

Answer 8

smile at the ignorant people in that town.....
this used happend to me when i was younger but father told if smile at them they will feel stupid and woudnt do it again

if that wont work just move to another place that the same quality at your town but with more friendly faces.

good luck with your decision

Answer 9

If i were you i'd pull them up if they say anything to my son or daughter. This happens in quite a lot of places. Tell them that if they have anything to say about your family then they've to come and tell you.

Answer 10

Ignore them.