Your hear it all the time that money can buy you happiness but what about beauty, brains and over all success?
Do you see your looks and smarts and success as something that will always gurantee you to have a great life?
I'm not one for "celebrity news" but what sparked this question was the news that Christie Brinkley at age 52 was yet, another victim of adultry. Not only her but Halle Berry a very smart and succesful woman, not too long ago had the same thing happen to her and she ended up divorcing him.
*I'm not saying it doesn't happen to men either but women tend get the sharp end of the stick a lot. Ouch.
2006-07-20 15:19:44 · 11 answers · asked by Gemini23 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If I were to make your question a mathetmatical formula, what you're essentially asking is if the following were true:
Beauty + Brains + Success = Happiness
What is the definition to happiness? What is happiness to that individual? Is it money? Is it love? Is it complete fidelity? When one figures out what happiness is to them, then it becomes a much easier task to answer this question. Otherwise, it is an ambiguous solution of infinite means.
Of course beauty, brains and success can't solely be the formula to happiness. If happiness to me is being able to see the sunrise, then I should be happy everyday. I don't have to be beautiful, smart, and successful for that.
I don't believe happiness is shallow. The attributes you have mentioned in this potential formula merely skims the surface of what a person actually is. Sure these are positive characteristics, but perhaps such positive characteristics don't even BELONG in the equation to happiness.
Look, Hally Berry, Christie Brinkley, and Denise Richards are beautiful people who have garnered the attention of the world due to their good looks and crumbling relationships. Supermodels have gone anorexic. Marilyn Monroe overdosed on drugs. There's a high suicide rate at MIT, a school reknowned for its intelligent minds. Scrooge was grumpy all the time, but he had all the money in the world.
If happiness is fidelity than the components of a healthy relationshp would equal fidelity.
My formula for that is:
Communication + Understanding + Mutual Respect + Care + Devotion + Grit + Active Common Interests/ Activities + Affection + Time for one another = Fidelity between two people
Active common interests and activities such as exercise, ballroom dancing, hiking, cooking, etc. keep the relationship fresh and exciting. Many of the people mentioned in the question have incredibly busy lives that don't have time for their spouses. In most cases, a bond can fail if they don't have the time needed to refresh and rekindle a relationship. Think about the friends that have faded away merely because you stopped having time to see them? You've basically stopped sharing experiences which thins the bond between people. Different situation, though similar concept.
Of course, this is a general formula.
In Halle Berry's case, fidelity was difficult because her husband was a sex addict. Every relationship is different and carries different variables which each requires a different custom made formula.
In conclusion, brains, beauty, and success DO NOT equal happiness.
Define happiness and reach inside yourself. Then you'll figure out your own formula on how to get it.
It's all about awareness.
2006-07-20 18:56:29 · answer #1 · answered by wordtherapy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Obviously those qualities aren't enough. I've been told that some men will take a fat ugly woman that treats them well, than a beauty queen with a bad attutude. I'm not sure I buy that, but the reality is that looks, brains, and success (thought great qualities) isn't all. It's pretty much a package deal.
I met a guy recently that told me that he's dating a beautiful Dr. He said she's really smart, a sexy head turner, obviously very successful, independent..."all that." He's been with her for 3 yrs, and he loves her, but he doesn't "like her" as a person. I had to think about that one. It impressed upon me that a woman can't be all things to everyone. If/when it's real love, her sig. other will love her the best way they know how for who she is. And if he can't deal with her negitives, and is any kind of man, then he will gracefully back out BEFORE disrespecting her.
No one says you have to put up with anything you no longer like or love, but don't be a boy about it, be a real man and walk away with your integrity.
2006-07-20 22:32:32 · answer #2 · answered by cinimon_s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Generally, happy people are predisposed to happy. Unhappy people are disposed to complaining, griping, misery, etc, etc....
If you're basically happy, you may have set backs, but you will quickly recover and be happy again. Resilience can be beautiful!!
If you're basically unhappy, you won't have the disposition get far, at least in relationships.
The problem is in the media we daily see "successful" people just because they're rich, beautiful, or famous. Any usually few get there without having a happy disposition.
The problem is, desirable people don't settle for less than other desirable people. And desirable people will always be tempted by others who want them. When things go bad, it ends, but the "desireable, happy" people are resilent, and bounce back. After all, they're desireable also, and have plenty of opprtunities.
2006-07-20 22:50:33 · answer #3 · answered by mt_hopper 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is happiness? Someone by your side that will never cheat on you? Or is it something more?
Success does fill your need for recognition.
Beauty fill your need for approval
Smarts fill your need to be better than everyone else.
Those traits help to get some happiness, but real happiness depends on who you are, and how you have dealt with the issues in your life. Depending on others to bring you happiness is a waste of time.
You take charge of your life and the rewarding healthy and happy life you want can be achieved.
But it most come from deep within.
2006-07-20 22:39:45 · answer #4 · answered by umbralatin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Your life is what you make of it, some people it makes happy to be beautiful, but not be brainy.
Some people are happier having the brains and not the looks.
Anyone can be successful, but what the get out of their success is the question.
And it doesn't matter if you have all 3 + the money, hearts still get broken, and lives get ruined through bankruptsy, divorce, cheating ect. whether you are rich or poor........We are all human......
and life goes on!
2006-07-20 22:42:03 · answer #5 · answered by rdhedhottie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't buy happiness, since it is a state of well being. You can be smart, gorgeous, and successful and still be miserable.
I do believe though you can have as many moments of happiness as you chose. Like your first kiss, that time you went to that place with so & so. To many people believe happiness will fall in their lap or that they are undeserving of it.
Really, it's all what you create and experience. Enjoy life.
2006-07-20 22:29:01 · answer #6 · answered by thoughtsofastranger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
looks and brains and beuty and success can all fade away
money can't buy you happiness, but it sure can rent it for a while
women get the sharp end of the stick in a relationship
men get the sharp end of the stick in a divorce
2006-07-20 22:26:03 · answer #7 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
beauty brains and sucess cant buy you happiness nothing can for some people itmight,every one has different needs inside them to feel fufilled but having a great relationship and being in love is the foundation to a great sucessfull and never ending happy life,someone whom is your soal mate and partner will truely make life worth living,
2006-07-20 23:00:30 · answer #8 · answered by treatau 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
happiness is by being content and grateful. beauty, brain and success not the factors.
2006-07-20 22:42:11 · answer #9 · answered by chasing rainbow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may not buy happiness, but it sure makes a great down-payment!
2006-07-20 22:30:38 · answer #10 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋