Husbands: Why is it okay to check out other females and/or not value a marriage enough to be totally faithful?

Question

If this is you, a married man that agrees with these question please answer honestly.

If you are married and faithful please state why you are faithful in everyway.

If you are a female what is your opinon on the matter?


Basically is it okay for husbands or wives to look at someone else in a sexual way or even a way that has some negative conotations that is against marriage?
Also, is it okay for husbands or wives to cheat in anyway or to do things against their marriage?

I will post my thoughts after I see what most people think about the topic.

Answer 1

I try to be faithful because I recognize that God has entrusted me with the soul of another person. I recognize that my wife deserves to be loved faithfully. My wife honors and loves me, and it would be horribly unjust for me to giver her anything but honor and love in return. I try to be faithful in heart, mind, and act because I know that the best way for me to love my kids is to love my wife. When I fail her, I fail them.

Having said that, I have add that our society is terribly sick regarding the issue of sex. Most men do not know how to really enjoy their sexuality and do not seem to realize how enslaved they are to lust. They enjoy sex and sexuality in the same way as people who binge enjoy food. Because the sex drive is very powerful, a man needs to constantly strive to master it. "A man can either master his passions and be happy, or be mastered by them and be miserable." Unfortunately, our society has all but lost this awareness.

One may leer lustfully or just look in "appreciation," but neither behavior will bring peace or happiness. I really like what "WN" states. Help your man to master his lust by fully sharing yourself with him and inviting him to fully share himself with you. Don't pretend to be morally superior. Women suffer different but equally reprehensible temptations--like a tendency to be cuttingly sarcastic and self-righteous, as you evidence in your question.

Answer 2

I am a husband and do not believe that it is okay for me to look at other women in a sexual or other way that reflects anything other than fidelity and faithfulness to my wife. It goes without saying, then, that I don't think cheating is okay. When two people marry, they commit to each other in all circumstances and with all their hearts for as long as they remain married. Flirting and fantasizing and things like pornography and strip clubs all eat away at the solid foundation upon which marriage should be built, no matter how "innocent" people claim such things are. How can you be 100% dedicated and focused on your spouse, if you spend time thinking about or flirting with others? It's no wonder to me that affairs are so common, given our society's generally lax attitude towards what constitutes commitment in marriage.

Answer 3

This will be a different point of view. Men and women, for that matter, are not perfect nor will they ever be. Both sexes in a relationship of whatever degree, will look at members of the opposite or even maybe the same sex with sexual inclinations, because it is inbred in all of us. Its what we really do with those thoughts that gets us into trouble. True, it is religiously wrong to look at others with the wrong idea, but if you look at it another way; that you are just admiring Gods work,is it still wrong? To act on your thoughts is indeed asking for trouble and is definitely wrong in the eyes of the Lord, but as I said, we all are only human and life will guarantee we will do stupid things from time to time,and mankind has a tendancy to destroy whatever is at hand, thus high rate of divorce by unfaithful spouses. Life gives us many options, some right or wrong, but it is up to each and every one to chose their option and either reap the rewards or suffer the consequences of our actions. No one else makes our final choices but ourselves, life may give us temptations. If this isnt the kind of different opion, then I apologize for this.

Answer 4

People are going to look at other people both of the same sex and the opposite sex and thats just the way it is, it isn't cheating its being human. It has nothing to do with being faithful. Obviously, staring is a different thing or making comments to your partner along the lines of why don't you look more like him or her is way out of line but thats an extreme case and goes way beyond 'checking out'. Of course its not alright to cheat or do things against the marriage, but it is also possible for partners to be hypersensitive about things like this and in that case it is ridiculous to cater to that persons insecurities. Someone with issues that big isn't going to be happy no matter what you do because they have too many issues within themselves that nobody can solve but them.

Answer 5

Do I find it acceptable for my husband to cheat on me by having a sexual or other intimate relationship with another woman? Absolutely not! Do I expect him to look at other women and not find them physically and even sexually attractive, and maybe even be physically aroused by their attractiveness? Again, absolutely not! Just because he may find another woman attractive (and boy I hope he does--because I'm no supermodel here!) in no way detracts from the way he feels about me or in any way is indicative of his commitment to our marriage. He has to work with women every day, some of them are attractive, some have even hit on him from time to time (yes, knowing he's married). I trust him enough to know he will not accept their overtures, and have enough faith in our relationship to know that even though he may be tempted by these other women, he's still coming home to me every night. I guess I'm just pretty secure in my relationship with him, but we've been married over 18 years now.

Answer 6

Being faithful is about establishing a level of conscieness that transcends decision making. That decision is already made, you don't entertain being unfaithful.

Checking out other females is slightly different. I really think there is a component of that which is biological and it happens without stopping to think about it. For me, if I realize I'm doing it, I'll stop.

The other component of it is that the female form is a work of art and it is very reasonable to admire it a non-harmful way.

Answer 7

I am a married woman. I have been married for 14 years. The reality is we all look. We are human and we are sexual beings. I have no problem with my husband looking, I dont take offense to it at all. I think what it boils down to is trust. I took my husband to a strip club for his birthday and went with him. We had a great time! Communication and trust.

Answer 8

Well, blatant "checking out" is in bad taste altogether and I do not approve, even if the checker and checkee are single. Checking out secretly/covertly is impossible to stop, unless you are blind or depressed. How can we ignore God's beautiful creations all around us? How can we ignore beauty? Aesthetic appreciation is normal, as is some arousal/temptation. But as moral beings with free will, we know we cannot act. Therefore, cheating is not okay.

Answer 9

scientific research has said that nature created males for their offspring...thus men genetically and by nature need to diversify their sexual intercourses. marriage comes at the end. sorry but you just cannot go against nature...it's like asking a gal not to make a fuss now and then!!!!! or like asking a gal not to have her menstural spread!!!

Answer 10

i'm no longer non secular, yet I do have heavy sociological / anthropological history. in case you experience the favor to "concern" your God, then it is because you experience responsible for some thing, or you go with to experience victimized. maximum individuals do not concern their God. They love their God. God is like the only accurate chief. As Machiavelli stated, a tremendous chief might want to be both loved and feared. If he's only loved, then people will nonetheless do what they prefer antagonistic to his needs at situations. If he's only feared, then they received't love their own lives, only doing what he needs out of concern of ramifications. in the adventure that they love and concern him, then they'll do what he needs out of love and comprehend first, and out of concern 2d. enable me attempt to apply a diverse analogy for God... God, in maximum peoples' eyes, is style of a tremendous be certain. a tremendous be certain makes use of two factors love and a million section discipline to be certain people lead a tremendous existence. a million section love is unconditional. God loves you unconditionally, because you're his introduction. (only as a be certain loves their newborn unconditionally). a million section love is for effective reinforcement. God shows you want to advantages your good habit. that is what maximum individuals call "advantages", "miracles", etc. mum and dad do a similar with them children; supply them hugs even as they prevail. a million section discipline is used for detrimental reinforcement. God punishes people even as they have been undesirable. mum and dad do a corresponding to children. Now, maximum individuals will keep on with a Godly existence because they comprehend and love God as a results of at least a million section unconditional love, and a million section effective reinforcement. If that would not artwork then they concern the a million section discipline. notwithstanding, what's "blessing" and "punishment" from God is subjective. diverse religions, or perhaps persons, may even see some thing as a blessing even as others see it as a curse. each man or woman can see besides the actuality that they prefer into some thing. even as a mom hugs a newborn, it is rather tangible that that is a hug. yet, even as someone unearths $5 on the line is that a blessing? What if it only enables them to do some thing undesirable? i imagine the further proper thanks to seem at God is that he supplies people opportunities. The $5 is a probability. How the guy chooses to apply that probability dictates even if that is a "blessing" or "curse".