The guy I'm with had the problem all men dread tonight. How do I make him feel better. I've told him its not his fault and that I'm not upset. I think he's worried its gonna happen again.
2006-07-20 09:37:59 · 13 answers · asked by Deborah 1 in Health ➔ Men's Health
Sorry perhaps I didn't make myself clear. It was embaressing for me to. Its not that he was "early" its that he wasn't there at all. If you know what I mean.
2006-07-20 09:46:04 · update #1
BTW Rnforhire - we are mature enough to be able to dicuss sex. My issue was that I wanted to be able to offer the right level or support without being overly sympathetic. Which is why I wanted a GUYS point of view.
Ps thanks to all the guys who have givin thier point of view and feelings. It's really helped me be supportive of my guy.
2006-07-22 04:06:21 · update #2
Give him a hug and leave the matter alone. Much depends on the kind of girl you are. Don't try to seduce him in an obvious way for a while (but use your subtle tricks all the time, like bending down when you are working). Don't move to the second stage until he's had a good few erections. Really pretend for a while that this is not the most important thing. Divert his attention to other things without telling him why. He may be tired or under pressure or whatever. It's normal. It is not the most important thing in a relationship. Give him time and tell him you are not in a hurry. Prostate massage is a good idea, really, and that girl seems to know something! A really consistent practice in control is through meditation and yoga. The yoga cycle of the TM people is good and there's one posture called the locust (combined with the cobra). I recommend it. But don't give it importance. Instead give importance to things you like to do together to grow together. The good times will follow. Be patient.
2006-07-20 21:20:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
That's a hard one (excuse the pun). I don't think there is a lot you can do. It will be a huge bash to his ego and by trying to 'help' him, you are only going to highten the issue. If he'd crashed the car, then a hug might help but 'this' is something he's going to have to get his own head around! By 'helping' you might only make things worst and some of his concerns/anger might end up being directed at you.
If it was me, I'd hope (like you) that my partner would be cool about it. Inside I would be gutted and a tad scared to having another crack at it but being a bloke, I'd eventually have to give it another go.
Be there for him but try to do it in a way that isn't too obvious or even worst, in a way that makes him feel as though he's being treated as 'ill'!
........... best of luck !
2006-07-20 09:45:51 · answer #2 · answered by nickthesurfer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmmmm, ... bake him a strawberry rhubarb custard pie it always works for me....... LOL truly sounds like you were supportive and did what you could for his moment of masculine impotence ...... Just let it go ..... it is now his issue ... as it could have originated from all kinds of things; like emotional stress..... or a chemical reaction like drinking too much alcohol or having a strychnine base in his LSD ..... if it is a serious physical problem it will become obvious over time and he will need to see a doctor but there are plenty of drugs for that.
Remind him sex is natural and it works better if he does not take it or himself so serious ..... So on the light side ...... just tell him if he can no longer cut the mustard he can for sure lick the jar. LOL
Good luck and keep on smiling
2006-07-20 09:57:14 · answer #3 · answered by rcabrave 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to jerk off an hour beforehand. Also tell him you're flattered that he thinks you're so hot that he can't last longer than 20 seconds.
33% of men suffer from premature ejaculation. Chances are he's just one of them.
Also tell him after having sex with the same girl over and over, pretty soon it will take him looking at porn, getting spanked, and dirty talk to get him lasting anything less than one hour.
2006-07-20 09:42:51 · answer #4 · answered by Jay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you mean his little soldier wouldn't stand to attention... (I don't dread it!)
Stop talking about it, stop trying to reassure him. Let him deal with it. And for the next time, maybe try something a bit different. Make sure that there's no pressure to perform.
2006-07-20 09:44:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Act like it's perfectly normal if you want him to be comfortable.
He may not have anticipated sex last night, so he may have masterbated before hand to stay calm with you. That happened to me once.
It does happen on occasion, it is normal.
2006-07-20 09:42:35 · answer #6 · answered by thedavecorp 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy may be having premature ejaculation.It may be due to nervousness and afraid of sex.Go slow.Build confidence him.Please understand description of sex for many hours in porno /XXXvideos are not correct.The sex will last from 2.5 minutes to 7 minutes(maximum)
2006-07-20 21:22:53 · answer #7 · answered by leowin1948 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's going to happen again. Big deal. It's just something that happens, even to the studliest studs. And your friend should know that.
If he doesn't...educate him, with affection.
2006-07-20 09:44:03 · answer #8 · answered by St. Hell 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly, the risk of impotency is proportional to the build-up... in other words, he needs to quit playing with his little friend when you aren't around and then he will be able to perform... about broaching this subject, I truly feel that if you are not mature enough to discuss sexual issues, than you shouldn't be having sex..
2006-07-20 09:56:26 · answer #9 · answered by RnforHire 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cant do much, dont give him sympathy he already feels inadiquate. tell him he gotta make up for it by fxxking your brains out soon ( dont say next time) or tell him to get some sleep and you will wake him up by sucking him in the morning. try lighthearted dirty talk or shove your finger up his bum and massage his prostate
2006-07-20 11:50:10 · answer #10 · answered by busted 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋