Relationship Advice please help?!?!?

Question

My relationship just ended. Love is not a word I toss around but I honestly love her... still do...

She broke it off because she needed to make college and work top priorities, which is fine, I understand that but she refuses to break contact... she emails, texts, messages, calls me everyday just to talk.

It always ends in us both being upset and it's not helping... I finally blocked her messages and am not accepting her calls because I need time to heal. But she cries on my voicemail because I'm out of her life..

I told her that I cannot ever see her the same and there's no hope for us ever getting back together because she's hurt me so much in all this..

Am I wrong?

What's the quickest route to normality?

Answer 1

Dude trust me I just went through all of that myself. I'm sorry to say but there is no easy route back to normality. You are doing the right thing because it will just ending up hurting both of you if you keep communicating. What has worked for me is just rely on friends to keep you busy and try not to have much time where you are just doing nothing because you are only going to think about it and it wil depress you. Good luck man.

Answer 2

Work and college are difficult at best without having to try to put romance in the picture. What was going on in your relationship or her work and school that made her feel so overwhelmed. My daughter and her boyfriend just went through this and come to find out on the few occasions when they could be together they were constantly fighting because he thought she needed to make him more of a priority in her life. She truly loves him but feels that love, marriage and kids should wait until they have the educations to get jobs to make all the other a reality. He has a good job and doesn't think she needs to worry about getting her education. My husband and I talked to both of them. My daughter is right that there are no guarantees in life and you can't be dependent upon someone else's job or career. The boyfriend is right that a relationship that isn't at least nurtured some won't last. SOOOO, we suggested my daughter cut back on the number of classes she was trying to take and we also agreed to her cutting back some of her hours at work. Things are much better now.

Answer 3

No you aren't in the wrong she is! If she is the one who broke it off but still calls and texts you everyday it sounds like she is having second thoughts. More like she wants to have her cake and eat it too! I understand that she has hurt you and you can't trust her again like you did before and that is normal. If you really don't want this woman in your life you need to make that clear to her in every way possible. Send a letter saying you want no more contact and talk to her in person and say it to her face. If she doesn't get it after that tell her you are going to get a restraining order against her if she doesn't want to listen the easy way. The easiest way to get over her is don't answer the phone when she calls and don't respond to her text messages. Good luck with her!

Answer 4

When love is involved it's going to take time to heal. A relationship becomes away of life, a routine if you will. It's hard to create a new routine but it's possible. You have expressed your feelings on the relationship and now it's her turn to learn to accept it. You are taking all the proper steps to heal yourself. Don't feel bad for being selfish, your feelings come first now. Maybe in the future you two can be friends, but right now it's too early. You both need to come to terms and only time can bring that.

Answer 5

You're doing the right thing. She was playing games with you. It seemed like she wanted you to still be hanging around while she kept her options open. You are being very strong about this. I'm in the same situation, sort of. My bf says he can't handle certain things right now, and says that maybe we should break up, but he never leaves me alone. Keep being strong. Let her know what she's missing out on. Sometimes a little too late, and too late period.

Answer 6

You are not wrong for this and youseem to be a very nice guy. Just keep her out of your life. I do not know the quickest route to normality, but I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 7

You're doing it bro. I'm actually shocked someone on Yahoo actually has some strength to do what is right.

This chick breaks up with you, and you go about your life...and she comes crying back - that's how it always works!

Go you for doing what it takes to get over it. She only wants you because she can't have you. If you were to let her back in your life, she would just hurt you again because she clearly has other priorities.

Answer 8

You are a smart guy. She may already be seeing someone else and just keepin you on a loose lead in case it doesn't work out. And this may be something that will happen again if you go back with her. Shut her out completely. She made the first move. Good Job! Sorry for your pain though.

Answer 9

i dont think you are wrong. you do need to heal. i know where you are coming from because i had to go through the same thing. if she wants to be more than a friend to you, she shouldn't of break up with you. cuz true love should be there no matter wrong even if it has to do with college
Good Luck!!

Answer 10

You are right in what you are doing. It sounds as if she wants to keep you dangling just in case she doesn't find someone else...She broke up with you because of college and work....but breaking up means 'breaking off'...In order to get your life normal you have to let this go and move forward. Tell her that you have to move on...and don't sit there listening to her crying voicemail....she just wants to keep you on the side...don't do it!