my boyfriend is 26 years old. i always catch him in the middle of the nite watching porn on dvd's, on the computer, or looking at his dirty magazines. and then he does his business with himself and comes back to bed. will this ever stop? is this a phase with men in their twenties. it makes me feel that i'm not pleasing him enough or in the right way? should i worry? should i break up with him over it? how can i make it stop bothering me?
2006-07-20 08:44:38 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Unless they're very inhibited, guys stop masturbating once they're so old they can no longer get it up (or dead). Most guys who masturbate look at porn: if they don't, they're imagining the same sort of stuff in their head.
If he isn't giving you all the sex that you want, then you have a legitimate complaint, and you need to take it up with him that making you happy comes before jacking off. But if you're getting all you want, and he wants it more often than you do (and given the range of sex drives that people have, it's pretty inevitable that one partner or other in a marriage will have a higher sex drive), wouldn't you rather he was masturbating than either unhappily frustrated, or cheating on you?
Do you really want him to expect that you put on a sexy show and give him a bl0w job every time he feels horny, whether or not you feel like it? Do you want him to wake you up in the middle of the night and say "Honey, I'm having trouble getting to sleep, give me a quickie so I can relax?". If so, offer him that deal: if he gives up the porn, you will take care of his needs any time, day or night, whenever he happens to feel horny, no matter how tired or uninterested you are, you'll be happy to turn him on and get him off, and won't ever make him feel bad about it. Or would you rather just let him take care of his own needs now and then without having to bother you?
Most people masturbate, even when they are in relationships. They may do it less if they're getting regular sex, but they still do it.
2006-07-20 09:00:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-07-19 14:19:50 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My question is to you have you expressed how it makes you feel to him because that is an important step. As he gets older he might stop, but then some men don't. Ask him if you are enough for him and if you please him in the right ways because that may be the only way to find out. Talk to him about it and see where it goes from there. There really is no way for it to not bother you so just try to relax for the time being and talk to him and then maybe you will be able to not let it bother you. I hope this helps if you need anymore advice let me know.
2006-07-20 08:50:56 · answer #3 · answered by mandi88_bailey05_ray 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's as addictive as drugs... yes it is a problem.. but he doesn't see it as that.
You sound like your doing what u should be... he is just off too far from what is norm. Yea worry... have an open talk with him that it is disrupting a live relationship.
Break up? this could easily carry over into the marriage and family life... etc... 26 years old he is still a horn dog so yea he may slow down later but it needs to be checked and you are part of his life and it needs to be brought too light.
Possibly educate yourself a bit more.. Library books, studies etc... and possibly counciling?
THIS IS A HUGE PROBLEM and shouldn't be ignored... completely stop...ahhh... every guy likes to peek just once in awhile just too make sure nothings changed... but out of control is no good.
2006-07-20 08:51:34 · answer #4 · answered by Maken trax 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off its not about you its him. My boyfriend has more porn than the lord allows. It bothers me sometimes, but its not about me. He'll jerk off and still want to have sex.
Anyway I would talk to him about what he's doing and how it makes you feel chances are he doesn't know how much it bothers you.
It just might be part of his normal routine so he doesn't feel like anything is wrong with his behavior. He's a guy it's what they do.
just talk to him, If its all he does break up with him.
2006-07-20 08:57:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think its a phase and its not you. I doubt if it will stop some men have a stronger sex drive that turns them into perverts, no really nice way of saying it. If you stay this will be up to what you can tolerate or even want to.
2006-07-20 08:54:38 · answer #6 · answered by auntkarendjjb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all never..men never stop looking at porn.talk to him about it maybe there is something he is missing. Maybe the 2 of you can watch it together and have all kinds of fun, but i would just talk to him about it
2006-07-20 11:12:27 · answer #7 · answered by asking4trouble2001 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
guys always want to enjoy and show to his girl friend what he is watching ,don't break this is normal to watch porn but no affair with other girl .enjoy you too
2006-07-20 08:51:52 · answer #8 · answered by sangita 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well guys will be guys and their brains are somewhere else, ( if you catch my drift ) and maybe if you wanna stay with him, maybe think of ways to pleassure him and make him let go of the stupid porn. you can do it if you put your mind to it. good luck. :)
2006-07-20 08:50:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes go ahead and break up with him it seems you are still young.
And it has nothing to do with you pleasing him.
I guess its like alcoholics. He seems to be doing too much of it and has become addicted.
2006-07-20 08:48:26 · answer #10 · answered by jercha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋