To make things worse, I have just contacted him again thru email. I just love and miss him so much. I yearn for him. Oh jeez, you guys, I'm in trouble. What must I do with this wild and beating heart?
2006-07-20 06:50:14 · 18 answers · asked by suki's mom 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hard to say, obviously there is something you are not getting in your marriage. You should figure out what that is and talk to your husband about it. You did make a promise to him, so you should make every effort to fix things before ending it. Fact of the matter is if you just "suck it up", there will be another guy down the road who catches your eye. You need to find what is at the root of this and determine whether it can be fixed or not. Either way, this ex probably should not be the reason you leave your husband. Maybe down the road if things don't work out, but certainly, it is not wise to start a relationship with this guy while you are married, or leave your marriage JUST for him. Take these two men out of the equation, and ask yourself, What do I need? Also, you said it yourself, this is your ex! Most relationships with ex lovers do not work out. There is a reason you guys broke up. Unless it was a distance issue, there are issues to resolve there too. I say, think about what you need and find a way to get that in your marriage. If that doesn't work, THEN consider other options.
2006-07-20 06:59:17 · answer #1 · answered by Rock Star 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Grow up! What are you twelve years old? People often want what they can't have. If you are bored with your life, either you are boring, or you have given up on your marriage, then you need to make some hard decisions. For instance, what is it about the ex you miss? Is it the way he made you feel about yourself? If this is it, then work on yourself, try to attain what you had then. Like where you in better shape then? Did you have less stress in your life? Make steps to alter your perceptions. Fix you!
Now, Is it your husband just doesn't do it for you anymore, in or outside the bedroom, either one? Then it is up to you to talk with him, tell him what you want. Try something new. Pick something you always wanted to do together, but were a little scared to do, then do it. Fix him!
Don't forget, he is your EX for a reason!!
2006-07-20 14:04:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you should not keep secrets from your husband...not good
Why did you marry him if you were still in love with someone else....not fair
I have posted this to someone else but maybe it will help you....
My best friend of almost 30 years left an abusive relationship, but he was her first love and she lost her virginity to him. She packed up after he left for work after a extremly bad fight..kissed him goodbye, see you later, then got on a plane and moved 1500 miles away. She got involved with a guy who was a friend of her family...at first she was seeing him as "just friends" The guy was totally in love with her and would of given her the world if she asked. After a year or two she married him, Great guy, came from money, treated her like a queen....but she still remained curious about the jerk who she left. Her husband was trying to start up his own business and he was working late a lot.....she became bored and even more curious...One day she was talking to her fly by night brother (who remained friends with the ex) and he mentioned that he was asking about her....well one thing lead to another (this is like 7 years of being married to the nice guy) and the jerk drives the 1500 miles to come and secretly see her. I WARNED HER...BUT SHE WOULD NOT LISTEN
she ended up getting in the car with this jerk and went back with him...Her husband was devistated, he would of taken her back but.....when she realized she had made a mistake and she was going to go back to her husband....she had gotten pregnant by the jerk! So she stayed with her baby's father and divorced the nice guy. That was 20 years ago, and she has lived 20 years of hell. Moral of the story....be careful what you wish for!
2006-07-20 14:31:52 · answer #3 · answered by Linda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be mature. Right now you are being imature. You are willing to hurt your husband just to go with your ex. Your ex is history, lady! He's gone. Sure you miss him and all, that's ok, but over-do-it! You have a husband now, love him, be there for him, and settle down. You made a promise when you married your husband, so be a good wife and fulfill your promises.
2006-07-20 13:54:56 · answer #4 · answered by Mstislav 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can put that old relationship behind you and live your current life, or you can divorce your husband and have another go with your ex.
How foolish for you to reinitiate contact. How would you feel if you learned your husband had done something of that nature? Treat others as you would like to be treated.
Make up your mind which path you will walk...then put your whole heart into THAT path...stop torturing yourself and betraying your husband...
2006-07-20 13:55:44 · answer #5 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
firstly you are right situation such arise in life , but you got to be more practical and honest to yourself, or else you will have no one other to blame but yourself, its a pity it happened, but now that you are married and have a loving hus why spoil it , just imagine he doing the same , digging old graves just stinks, so you are not the same , what you were , you are married and be sensible . avoid contacts and do not disturb your life. i think ur x also doesn't seems to be a good one as he should have adviced you if he truly loves you. beware !
2006-07-20 14:04:17 · answer #6 · answered by ramesh n 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds to me you love your husband but your not in love with him and the love of your life is your ex.....well he has to be your ex for a reason right.....your in a tough situation...what happens if your husband finds out you contancted your ex what do you think he would do.....what if your ex is happy with his life now then what are you going to do.....your heart is going to be let down because you thought that just maybe you could have this fling with your ex.....it doesnt work that way...if your not happy with your marriage you need to talk to your husband and figure out some options because if your marriage is over then you need to think of what you are going to do before you go jumping into someone elses arms.....make sure that you are doing this because you love your ex and its not a lust thing because in the end your the one who has everything to lose not your husband or ex....good luck and i hope you find true happiness in whatever it is you are looking for
2006-07-20 14:02:10 · answer #7 · answered by G's Gurl for life 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fantasies are exactly that, fantasies. You need to look back at why you divorced him,.....and concentrate on your current husband. Doing something really stupid, could hurt a lot of people,.....especially if there are children involved. Purchase a vibrator, and the warming KY gel. Wake up, you have responsibilities.
2006-07-20 13:56:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
suck it up and get over it. you've made a promise to love this man you married and im talking about the action love (not the emotional kind). so, if your integrity and character matter to you and your child, you just have to realize that you cant change the past, but you still have the oppertunity to make a beautiful future for your husband and your child.
2006-07-20 13:53:40 · answer #9 · answered by soul patrol baby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep it a secret unless you decide to leave your husband. If you are planning on seeing your ex on the side, be prepared to face the consequences. And make no mistake about it, there are ALWAYS consequences.
2006-07-20 13:53:40 · answer #10 · answered by brian k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋