genital herpes / genital warts?

Question

My wife and I have been married 15 years now. When I married her I knew she had genital herpes
Month into are marriage we found out she also had genital warts. Now living with someone with these std’s you just can’t be spontaneous in love making. I’m 48 y/o and so far I don’t have any of these std’s but, are love making been very little in are 15 years. I just don’t know how much longer I can live like this.
1.Should I just tell her its over? I really don’t want to break her heart, but I also have to think about myself.
2.Do you live with this, if so how do you cope with it?
Please don’t tell me to use a condom if you do you better educate yourself on these std’s, this is a skin to skin std and it can pop up anywhere anytime down there, and don’t tell me there’s more to a marriage and love than sex I know I have been living it for 15 years. PS I’m not fix it, I’m just using his laptop.

Answer 1

It sounds like one of you is a little paranoid. Taking medications prophylacticly in combination with condoms should protect you unless she has a particularly agressive strain of the condyloma which is rare. Lots of couples deal with this issue and have a healthy sex life. Have you spoken with your physician?

Answer 2

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Answer 6

Genital herpes, also commonly called "herpes," is a viral infection by the herpes simplex virus (HSV) that is transmitted through intimate contact with the mucous-covered linings of the mouth or the vagina or the genital skin. The virus enters the linings or skin through microscopic tears. Once inside, the virus travels to the nerve roots near the spinal cord and settles there permanently. When an infected person has a herpes outbreak, the virus travels down the nerve fibers to the site of the original infection. When it reaches the skin, the typical redness and blisters occur. After the initial outbreak, subsequent outbreaks tend to be sporadic. They may occur weekly or even years apart. Two types of herpes viruses are associated with genital lesions: herpes simplex virus-1 (HSV-1) and herpes simplex virus-2 (HSV-2). HSV-1 more often causes blisters of the mouth area while HSV-2 more often causes genital sores or lesions in the area around the anus. The outbreak of herpes is closely related to the functioning of the immune system. Women who have suppressed immune systems, because of stress, infection, or medications, have more frequent and longer-lasting outbreaks. It is estimated that as many as 50 million persons in the United States are infected with genital HSV. Genital herpes is spread only by direct person-to-person contact. It is believed that 60% of sexually active adults carry the herpes virus. Part of the reason for the continued high infection rate is that most women infected with the herpes virus do not know that they are infected because they have few or no symptoms. In many women, there are "atypical" outbreaks where the only symptom may be mild itching or minimal discomfort. Moreover, the longer the woman has had the virus, the fewer the symptoms they have with their outbreaks. Finally, the virus can shed from the cervix into the vagina in women who are not experiencing any symptoms. Women may be more susceptible to genital herpes infections because: •The genital area has a greater surface area of cells moist with body fluids (mucosal cells) than men. •Hormone changes during a woman’s menstrual cycle may affect the immune system, making it easier for the herpes simplex virus to cause an infection.

Answer 7

lol @ Monty.

Dude, I know you said not to say this - but you have been living with it for 15 years! You CHOSE to marry someone with her condition!

Now you want to leave because of it?

Sounds to me like there are other issues here...but hey...you're an adult...you're entitled to be happy, and if you feel having a disease free girl will give you that happiness, then leave.

I'm not coming down too hard on you...I would never marry someone with permanent std's in the first place (unless it was Milla Jovovich or Jennifer Anniston)...it is just an unnecessary stress.

Answer 8

I think there's more going on then the STD problem. Yeah, that's a big obstacle in a relationship but you need to ask yourself this question....if something happened to you and you could no longer have sex would it be OK for her to leave? You didn't go into this unaware of the problems associated with this disease. If you would rather have different positions and spontaneity are worth leaving your wife then do her a favor a tell her. But if you love her and want to stay in the marriage go to a psychologist that specializes in this field. There's help out there you just have to be willing to go the extra mile and find it.

Answer 9

I am absolutely terrified and I feel so alone. I just found out last week that I tested positive for hsv1 and 2. I have been with the same man for the past 10 years and within the last year found out that he has cheated on me with numerous women. I am so scared that I can give it to my children by kissing them and them eating with me...I feel like my whole life has changed. And even though the nurses, my doctor, and websites say that a lot of people have it I still feel like I am by myself. My self esteem has dropped and I feel like I have been used up. But now, My life is very happy.

Fast Acting Guaranteed Herpes Treatment?

Answer 10

Altho it is a bad break for you both I feel most sorry for her. You knew about this problem when you married her and you stuck it out 15 years. If my wife of 43 years came up with aids I wouldn't leave her because I love her. Sometimes its hard to do the right thing, I just hope that you will.

Answer 11

If you love her enough you will stay w/ her, If she had cancer, would you leave her?? Also genital warts do not usually show up on guys, so the likelihood of you having them is really good, it only takes 1 contact, so if you left, YOU would also be spreading them