I have been married for 14 years we have been seperated once for about a year, we are now back together again for 7 years, I care for him, but I can't say I love him like a wife should love a husband. I have no desire to have sex with him. There are alot of things in the past that have hurt both of us he says he loves me and will not give up. But he says hurtful things to me leaving me feeling hurt and ready ot fly...what do I do??????
2006-07-20 02:47:59 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you've already answered this question, there's no love left, no desire, no passion.....its over and you're wasting your time.
2006-07-20 02:52:06 · answer #1 · answered by justme_cheri 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm just coming out of a similar situation. I am 3 mo into my separation because I didn't feel that I loved my husband the way a wife should. He said many derogatory things and refused to support our family so I had to work 2 jobs while he sat at home. To answer your question, when you take inventory of your relationship and you find more bad than good things, it's time to part way, and vice versa. Life's too short to be unhappy and to stay in an unfulfilled relationship denies both of you the right to happiness. May peace be granted unto you.
2006-07-20 03:18:33 · answer #2 · answered by Angel Raye 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know when a marriage is over, when you have decided to give up on trying to rekindle the love you once had for him. It seems as though that's exactly what is going on here. He's prepared to fight for the marriage, but you have already decided that the love is gone, and so is some of the trust, due to the past.
If you are unhappy and unable to feel like it can be worked out, file for divorce.
2006-07-20 02:56:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to answer your questian. but i do know what you are going through, trust me i been there. My ex was having affares more the a woman should. but as i gorgave her the easyier she found she could do it as she knew i would forgive her. I got divorce papers on christmas eve, 4 years ago. even now i still care for her, but i am afraid, no matter what you do once you have fallen out of love .even a small amount, it is very nearly impooable to get that back. apart from sitting down and porring your heart out at him, without interuptions, you will never find out everything.
as him to sit and lay down everything, and you do the same. once its all in the open then build on what is left. or.. you will know what to do. but nothing is over , till the court stamps the the end. smile now and then and sing your heart out, it helps. i am crap at singing, but it sure put a smile on my face.
take care.
tony
2006-07-20 03:15:38 · answer #4 · answered by tony_shand2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We got to where we weren't talking to each other. We were just co-existing. Sleeping in separate rooms. Not wanting to be here. He would leave for hours at a time and not come home right after work. So this week I told him it is over. Now its on to the next step. I am looking for a place to live. And I will go see an attorney next week.
2006-07-20 09:03:48 · answer #5 · answered by I love winter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The past is hard to move on from. When trust is taken away it is so hard to regain it. If you are not happy move on life is to short. I was married for 7 years we separated got back together and the words hurt so bad. It was good for awhile and then we went right back to why we separate in the first place. Time to move on you deserve to be happy!!!!
2006-07-20 03:25:27 · answer #6 · answered by bifgrl31 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u have being with him for 14yrs that is a very long time to just throw away i would get into some counsel and stay with him and fight for my marriage , because i have being with my husband for 12 and we have problems , and we both have hurt each other in the past too, but i love him and he still love me , and i am not going to just throw the years i have being with him away without fightiing first . so fight for your marriage , see that what the devil wants he wants u to leave your husband so he can laugh at u , but don;'t let the devil steal from u , go to some conseling are go to church .
2006-07-20 03:12:13 · answer #7 · answered by angel h 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U CAN'T TELL THAT A MARRIAGE IS OVER IF U ARE NOT IN LOVE WITH HIM ANY MORE. TRUE AND DEEP LOVE IS ALL THAT MATTERS WHEN WE REFER TO A 14 YEARS MARRIAGE. SO FROM THIS POINT OF VIEW U SHOULDNT DIVORCE. ON THE OTHER HAND IF HE DOES NOT TREATS U GOOD AND HEARTS U, U SHOULDN'T STAY WITH HIM FOR AN OTHER DAY. NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO HEART US MENTALLY OR PHYSICALLY!
2006-07-20 02:59:44 · answer #8 · answered by ANGIE M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you know in your heart, your just waiting for your brain to tell you. You have answered you own question...you don't love him like a wife should and you don't want to have sex. You need to move on.
2006-07-20 02:55:35 · answer #9 · answered by chillilyn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey, pack your bags when hes not around and get to hell out and dont look back,hell always say things to make you feel bad or guilty, huys are good for that crap, your not happy and never will be with him again, so just go and move on with your life, trust me, ive helped alot of women in bad relationships, and abusive ones, 32 to be exact,get out while the getting is good, ive brought women to womens shelters, got them aptments in new towns, given them money for bus tickets, any thing to save there ***.my wife i have now was abused bad when i met her, and i got her out of it, and we fell in love, shes never been happier.her relationship with her ex started off like your is now, then it got to hitting her, get out, thats all i can say, you dont have to put up with it.good luck
2006-07-20 02:55:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's time to call it a day,don't forget, that this isn't a dress rehersal for life. You only get one shot at it.
2006-07-20 02:51:55 · answer #11 · answered by pikewingers 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋