Sex Drive Decrease During Pregnancy?

Question

I am 11 weeks and 2 days pregnant, i am so tired that I dont want to have sex.......a few weeks ago thats all i wanted and now im too tired.....my fiance thinks that it is him, he thinks im not attracted to him.......he is very insecure and thinks that I want another man....how many of you had a sex decrease and how did your husbands, fiances, etc handle it....how did you handle it.......

Answer 1

Your sex drive can increase or decrease in pregnancy. And it can change as well. You may find that a few more weeks in you will want sex again.

Tell your fiance that waves of hormones are washing through you right now and it means that everything is out of whack right now. Reassure him that you love him, remind him that it's his baby you are carrying.

good luck

Answer 2

With my first wife, one of the things that made her wonder if she was pregnant was that she wasn't lubricating normally, so sex was difficult (she may have stopped liking me by then but she did like the sex, so this was a standout event to her). Her mother told her, though her doctor said it wasn't so (of course, she believed her mother) that sex during pregnancy would injure the baby or cause a miscarriage, so that was out for a while. Then she heard that an orgasm would speed up or spark a delivery when she is about due--so suddenly, all the stuff we couldn't do before was fair game except for deep penetration moves.

With my second wife, she could think of nothing else but the discomfort that I caused her, so "Don't touch me" and "Are you kidding?" were the words of the day for most of the full term.

I think your fella is just frustrated out of his gourd. I know you are tired, but maybe just be the object of his affections, but in an obviously more passive way than previously. I would have thought my wives would be doing a lot of oral for me in the meanwhile, or that I could do it between the breasts (which were so wonderfully swelling by then), but no. Still, figure out some encouraging way of release for him that involves you in some way. Distract him, make him think with the head on his shoulders, by listening to your belly or feeling the movements, and telling him again "That's YOUR kid in there." As long as you include him in your pregnancy, you will keep him from feeling left out and alone again. Here's an analagy that he might appreciate: baseball isn't all just pitching and swinging a bat, sometimes you've got to run the bases. In this case, WE made a hit, now help me make this a home run.

Answer 3

I had absolutely no sex drive during either of my 2 pregnancies. In fact, I was feeling so tired and ill that it annoyed me when my husband even suggested intimacy. This feeling continued on after both of my boys were born as well. Apparently that's normal when breastfeeding because of hormone levels. It might be helpful if you show your fiance this reply as well as others that I'm sure you'll get so he realizes it's a hormonal reaction, it has nothing to do with him. As for how to handle it, I reassured me husband that it wasn't him, I had him read about this topic in my pregnancy books and I asked him to be patient. When I was feeling a little better (less ill and less tired) I put an extra effort into pleasuring him. When he wanted to pleasure me, I asked if he could give me nice back/foot/leg rubs instead.

Answer 4

The firdt trimester is always hard. Sounds like you are not far untill you get to the second trimester. Hang in there! The second trimester is great. You have energy and are feeling great and will want sex more. Explain to you fiance that you are tried because of hormones. You body is getting use to the change and it is not him. Things will get better and you will make it. Wait untill the baby arrives. Not only will you not have time for sex but you will be to tire from night feedings to care. So when the second trimester comes enjoy it while you can.

Answer 5

I was exhausted during my first trimester. It's really normal, and you need to explain to your fiance that your body NEEDS this rest. Plus, your hormones are flaring up in different ways-your sexual desires will come and go throughout pregnancy.
Fortunately, my husband completely understood. Maybe you should get the book What to Expect when you're Expecting and give it to your fiance...

Answer 6

When I was pregnant at the beginning I also felt the same way but it gets better as time goes on. Right now you body is still getting use to all the extra chemical changes. But as for your fiance I would just try to keep explaining to him that your body is changing and if he could just be patient that it will be better soon, and if he could stop taking it personally.

Answer 7

Some people go thru that, just tell you fiance you may feel more upto it or even tire him out during the second trimester. Alot of women peek during the third fourth and fifth month so tell him to prepare him self you'll feel alot better in the 2nd trimester you might not even feel like your pregnant.

Answer 8

Let him read a pregnancy book -- he needs to be educated about the fact that you are exhausted and probably sick and have no desire to have sex - but that it's not a reflection of him at all. What you're going through is totally normal - but it's almost over -- the exhaustion, etc usually goes away when you hit your second trimester.
Good Luck!!

Answer 9

My wife was completely un-interested in sex throughout both her pregnancies, also she vomited almost all the time. You will be glad to know that everything has returned to normal afterwards. If you hubby is a good man then he will wait it out with you. Good luck with your baby(ies) and try to get some sleep!

Answer 10

You have a extreme amount of estrogen going through you right now because obviously your pregnant..You sex drive has gone down alot because your body is focused on peparing the baby not having sex..So tell your fiance its not him, its what going inside your body..