Mothers: How soon is too soon to leave your baby home and go back to work?

Question

Why would a mother bow to such pressures and be obliged to leave her new born to strangers?

Answer 1

I left my first one to go back to work at 4 weeks. I was only working 3 hours a day, and he stayed with grandparents. I went back to work full time when he was 10 months and left him with a highly recommended sitter. I quit when he was 18 months and decided to stay home with him. While we still really needed the money, I was pregnant for my second and could not leave him, I had regretted leaving my first even for such a short time. We have learned to live on less and are just as happy (maybe happier) as those with everything.

Answer 2

You go back to work when you are ready, be that a financial or emotional decision. No woman WANTS to leave her baby, but many women in this day and age need to be either the sole provider for her family or there needs to be two incomes in the household to maintain nourishment, shelter, and safety for the family as a whole. Many women also enjoy working and having a purpose outside of the home. If your work is a large part of your life and up until giving birth most of your life goals were career orientated, you should not feel that you have to put your life on hold because you had a child. Other women find the same satisfaction in volunteer work. Quantity of time does not always ensure quality. If you do go back to work, just make sure that you are spending quality time with your child. An involved loving mother is what every child needs and wants. This can be accomplished as a working mother or a stay at home mother. If you can financially support your family without going back to work because your husband, partner, or family is able to support you AND you are happy to stay home and will feel satisfaction in your life then consider yourself lucky. Women should stop judging one another for the decisions that they make about raising their children and support one another. I am amazed at the tone and word choice of many responses throughout this site. Whatever you choose to do, you need to find support for you and your family and should surround yourself with women and families that are secure enough in themselves that they do not need to judge your every move to feel better about themselves.

Answer 3

I don't know...probably for some ridiculous reason like, oh...the baby needs to eat, and the only way the mother can provide the formula (other than living off the government) is to work so she can buy the formula... Just a thought.

To answer your question legitimately, I think any earlier than 6 weeks is too early. Most women need that long to recover from labor and delivery. C-sections require at least 8 weeks.

Answer 4

I went back to work after 8 weeks. I worked for 3 months (part-time) and then quit for almost 6 months. I currently work part-time, about 3 days per week for 4-5 hours each. My son has never been left with a stranger...my husband or my mother is here with him.

Everyone is different. I don't think anyone likes to go to work and leave their child(ren) at home or daycare...but some of us need to work. I am fortunate enough to work so little...I am home all day, usually leave during my son's nap, and am home shortly after he wakes up. I'm home for a few hours before bed to play and put him to sleep.

Answer 5

to the people who say that working moms have no maternal instincts and the one that said you shouldn't have kids if you can't afford to stay home with them - you should get up off your sugar coated a$$ and start living in the real world.
due to circumstances i was forced to start working when my baby was 4 months old and i was so heartsore the day i had to leave her at play school. she is now 5 months and really thriving at the day mom. i have an exceptionally close bond with my baby.
i really don't think people should pass comments about the choices that other people make with regards to the decision of going back to work. you have absolutely no idea what the lives are like.
i am so glad that i got to spend those first 4 months with my baby cos some moms have to go back to work after 6 weeks.

Answer 6

I think it has very little to do with maternal instinct - many, many mother's feel pressured to go back earlier than they would like because they simply need the money. The state of maternity leave in this country is a joke. Few women get any kind of paid leave, but many more are just happy to get leave through Family & Medical Leave Act -- which is unpaid. I know so many mothers who would love to be able to stay home w/their children but can't because they simply can't afford to.

Answer 7

Well, I guess there are many questions to ask as to why or not.
Does she solely provide for the household?
Is she a career woman in a high level position?

For me it was not a matter wanting to leave my kids with someone, it was a matter of having to provide for them. I was the parent that needed to make the money as well as the dad we both had to work in order to have food and clothing and shelter.



P.S. for those who said that women have not business having kids if they can't stay at home with them - get a life - there is nothing more I would have wanted than to stay home with my kids but because I am not wealthy and sit around all day eating bon bons and do nothing......I have a meaningful life with my kids and they understand resposiblity.

Answer 8

I had to go back to work when my son was five months old. My husband worked first shift while I watched him, and I worked second shift so my husband could watch him. I quit working after two weeks, I just couldn't handle not being home with him. I had a half hour drive to work and I would cry the whole drive for the two weeks that I had to work. Ever is to soon.

Answer 9

I went back to work when my son was 3 months old and it was the worse thing I ever did, but the situation made me have to. I ended up missing work alot of the time when he got sick and I got laid off because of it. I have stayed home with him ever since and now he is 15 months old, and I am in that situation again where I have to go back to work and I start on Monday. I will work nights and my husband works days so we only need a babysitter for 2 hours a day and my dad has agreed to do that for us since he lives with us, and isn't working. Maybe now is going to be easier to go back to work although, I really don't want to.

Answer 10

It's really a question of you being ready to let go of your little one. I went back to work when my boy was 31/2 months old, and I made sure I was done breastfeeding.

It's really up to you in the end. Follow your heart.