my moms husband just told her hes been cheating on her. this isnt about him and her but i was wondering what exactly causes you guys to cheat, what goes through your mind during the affair (not just the sex part) why do you do it when you know your going to be hurting someone? women please do not answer i just want a guys perspective.
2006-07-19 20:47:35 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
just for a little more info, their relationship was really good, my mom and dad tell me everything they are very affectionate to each other he said the reason was because she was holding him back but shes more successful then him and shes always trying to help him out with his business. and hes not that into sex coz hes older and has problems down there u know
2006-07-19 20:52:54 · update #1
it is just an immature, destructive call for attention. There is a thousand and one reasons why men (and women) cheat on their partners and that is what it all boils down to. Lack of attention, the other person being unattractive, sometimes even just the fact that they are sex addicts and would **** anything that moves.
Nothing really goes through our minds but we usually feel pretty guilty afterwards.
2006-07-19 20:55:50 · answer #1 · answered by Christian H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hmm good ? well the first thing that make use do it is that the relationship with the others has turn in some way that would make some look other places it just not all men that have affair guess it kind like the saying if you cant love the one you want love the one you with for a man to have affair mean hes been hurt to in some ways but then there's men that have affair just to do it sometimes you meet someone you get a Strong feel to do it an it take both side to do it so i guess the best thing for your mom an her husband is to work it out an if you mom ever meets some that she whats to have a affair with the husband better be open mind about it for what good for the gander is good for the goose i came back to edit this for one reasons it said i was the first to answer this an looking back on others i have answered tells me a lot
2006-07-20 04:04:34 · answer #2 · answered by whatdoesitmader 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough one to give a simple answer to unless you can be there to look into your parents relationship from an outsiders viewpoint. We don't know anything about the other female involved, was she older or younger than youre mom?
Was your parents relationship all work and no play or was it just that this other female re-ignited your dads inner manhood. Men can sometimes be easily lead astray by a new female.
This probably doesnt help much, maybe a mediation service could help resolve the situation for youre parents.
2006-07-20 04:13:39 · answer #3 · answered by Trakreppa5 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are really three reasons most guys cheat...
1. Some believe it is the "nature" of men to build groups. In nature you see one male, many females. IF this is true then, we are only five or six thousand years away from that part of our lives. Sometimes we revert.
2. Some guys see it as a challenge to get other women.
3. And please don't get angry here, women... but you tend to make it so easy. You push us away with your independence or you withhold sex on a whim to get your way. Now this isn;t me saying it... ever hear of Dr. Laura?
If you really want a great perspective on guys, you need to read her book "The Proper Care and Feeding of a Husband". It is not a flatering books on most of us guys. Frankly, it makes us look pretty stupid but, regardless of the impact, she is right on about it.
2006-07-20 04:11:53 · answer #4 · answered by Talisman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Males are by Nature Polygamous. Please watch mammals and other animals on Animal Planet / Discovery / National Geography channels.
Monogamy was imposed on Women by Men (to ensure the identity of the father - no DNA tests then - high hopes, women found ways to cheat). But monogamy was never meant for themselves. But the pretention must go on - We are Christians after all - commandments etc.
We refuse to be realistic and pretend to be monogamous. The Cheating comes hand in hand with the Pretention. Women cheat men as well.
In current situation, marriage has become irrelevant - but cheating continues (now you cheat your girl friend or boy friend on live-in partner).
Men are all-the-time simultaneously polygamous (change the girl anytime), women are one-after-another polygamous (that is change the guy after some time).
We must accept the fact that nature supports POLYGAMY. Religion says NO! "God forbids so - Monogamy only".
When you cheat Nature - you cheat yourself. BE HONEST TO ACCEPT POLYGAMY.
2006-07-20 04:12:49 · answer #5 · answered by nodoublespeak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Men are not good at sentiments.
2. All men are not cheaters.
3. This happens in individual cases.
4. Your mother should handle this.
5. Don't every generalise things.
6. For them women are meant only for sex.
7. Many human beings on this planet lack human relation principles.
2006-07-20 03:53:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is how men of lower instincts reconcile their desire to have a good carnal activity more often and "easier" than given by spouse, with the desire to be with the one they "really" love. Openness maybe wud have yielded better solutions.
Believe me, the non-sexual part is just the "excess" that comes with the territory. If it was paid sex or wildly random promiscuity, they have many, many reservations and fears. Preferably, the sex is free under the pretense of a "love". The attention is better too (than otherwise).
Sorry if I dont use "we" but "they". I dont belong in that male group, I am the odd one out, but in my own and greater family, it is rampant. So thats how I know. And I sympathize with the children who hurt too. What a boost to one's self worth, eh? I dont know about non-biological Dads, but my references are all with biological ones (worse). In fact in my country, 2 out of 3 cheat on spouses.
Men of higher instincts do it because they mainly are bastards, Nothing else justifies it.
2006-07-20 04:36:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know because i dont do that i couldnt imagine hurting my wife who i been married to for 2 years by having sex with another woman
2006-07-20 03:51:28 · answer #8 · answered by Matthew O 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i`m not like that but i can give u some entry about that. some guys do that cos they need some attention from their lovely mate. but i think in some case the problem is not that simple. do what u want say what u want to say, u deserve to to do that
2006-07-20 03:57:49 · answer #9 · answered by veer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
could be for any reason, if it was for just the sex I would say he's a jerk. but if he was seeking affection where he couldn't get it from home then this is a different story.
2006-07-20 03:50:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋