Recovering Shy Guy?

Question

I'm in a process of de-shying myself. I've become more open to people, I've always been a good listener so that wasn't much of a problem. I heard a tip that i thought was really good, though, especially with dating: treat every potential partner as if they were potential friends; that way, if they reject you when you ask them out, it would'nt hurt as much. First off, I think its a good idea, but i can't really picture potential dating partners as strictly friends, does anyone have any tips for a shy guy to get a girl? Also, does anybody have any more tips for de-shying myself?

Answer 1

As a former shy-guy this is a really hard question to answer. My roomate has the same problem, but at least you are trying to de-shyify yourself. That is the first step, basicly you just have to realize what you have to offer and have confidence. Women see through insecurity like glass, and it turns them off real fast, in my experiances atleast. The best thing to do is get out there and see what works for you, there is a book that might help you called "The shy guys guide to dating" (here is the amazon.com link http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0312187572/sr=8-1/qid=1153374420/ref=sr_1_1/103-8091030-5859052?ie=UTF8 ). That book helps some, because it tells you what to look for, which leads to getting numbers, etc. which in turn helps build your confidence, but the best advise I can offer is just hang in there and it will click some day, and when it does, look out!!

Answer 2

1. keep meeting people. Get to where you are good at asking short, open questions that keep people talking.

2. Memorize at least 50 short, funny jokes you can use when there is a lot of silence. Work on comedy and don't worry about embarrassing yourself about it.

3. Read Shakespeare's sonnets and memorize at least 10 of the romantic ones. Now THERE'S something to tell a girl on a date, a pefect reading of a romantic poem.

4. If you're feeling shy and nervous and unable to talk on a date --TELL HER YOU ARE SHY.

Answer 3

Hey-to de-shy yourself, try to find good friends and try new things. Surround yourself with good people that can only bring u up. Take some friends and go try something you have never done before, maybe something you have always secretly wanted to do but never had the guts. The more things you open up to, the more confidence you will build. It takes time to come out of a shell!!! Give yourself time, and above all-have fun!! Enjoy life, you only get one!! I dont know about trying to see all dateing prospects as "just friends", if you thought of them that way-why would you want to be dating them???? Just be yourself, sometimes you will get lucky, sometimes not-that's life-but if they dont like you for who you are-then you dont need them anyway!

Answer 4

do things one second at a time, that way u wont expect 2 much and there wont b any disappointments, best 2 live in the moment and the feel goods come as a surprise and the hurts dont hurt so much.
good luck and i hope it all works out 4 u.

Answer 5

I don't think there's anything wrong with being a bit 'reserved'. That just means you're selective of who your friends are and who you trust...

What you could do is start going to places that force you to be social. Like a fun class at your local community college..or even volunteering at the boys and girls club, go to a wine tasting event (if you're 21). ... try some ethnic restaurants and bars..see some live events..shop in new places

then try to strike conversations with people you're standing in line with..."dang this line isn't moving!"...that'll get a response from somebody! who ever says something comment on what ever they have in their hands or basket to purchase...

Answer 6

Personally I love shy guys... the guy I'm partially uhm Into now.. you could say is shy.. However, he still wasn't scared to talk to me.. the key is being your self i KNOW that may seem cheesey but its the truth what i like is that he is shy in the sense that I had to chase him a bit.. so it was fun and nice but yet when we talked he was comfortable around me to the point he could mess around joke and have fun :) dont be sad your shy think of it as a gift secretly girls like it! most.. that is.

Answer 7

I heard this tip once that has really helped me: Always act confident. Even if you feel like crumbling into a ball, don't let it show and eventually coinfidence will grow on you and you will shine like the sun!

Answer 8

Pretend that you are an actor, doing the part of some roll model that you would like to be like. Behavior becomes personality.

Answer 9

A shy guy who earns a lot will b liked by dashing dames and they do the rest

Answer 10

Take things slowly, don't try to be a super society person overnight, don't be afraid of rejection, ( been there, done that / still doing that..... ) & follow your instincts about where to go & what you want - SOMETIMES, that is.