Is it normal to keep baby in the same room with you at night?

Question

My baby is 4 months old and I can't stand the thought of him sleeping in another room until he is a little older. I also keep a dim light on to. It just bothers me and scares me at the thought. Am I alone with this...I probably won't quit doing it but I just need opinions. I love my baby and there is nothing wrong with him health wise and is sleeping through the night. Except occasionally he'll wake up and want to nurse. I just want him close so I can keep an eye on him. I get more sleep.

Answer 1

Yes, it's normal. Two generations of doctors scaring mothers about all the horrible things that could happen if they keep their babies nearby cannot change the fact that it is biologically normal for babies to sleep in bed with (and not just in the same room as) their parents. It's fine for as long as you choose to do it.

Answer 2

The problem is not whether one should or should not keep a baby in their bedroom. The real problem is that you are so uptight about it. About 10 years ago, the trend was towards keeping new borns in the bedroom with the parents. So, it is your choice. But you will find that neither you nor the baby will get much sleep. You will be listening to every move, every whimper, ever ready to pick him up. And he will sense your tension, and probably hear every noise you make. It is not in your best interest to keep him in your room. You need to accept that he is probably very hardy, and not breakable under most circumstances. Give yourself and the baby a break; let him have his own room. Then you both will sleep better. Stop worrying; most babies live long enough to reach the terrible twos!!

Answer 3

I don't see anything wrong with a 4-month old sleeping with it's mother. Remember, however, that the possibility exists that you could "overlay" him. Which means rolling over on him during sleep and smothering him. It doesn't happen often but it does happen.
How about getting a bassinet for him that you could put right next to the bed? He would still be right next to you and you could nurse him anytime he needs it.
I do think it's pretty weird when adults insist on their older kids sleeping with them all the time. Especially parents of the opposite sex. Not to mention that I don't know how a married couple can maintain a sex life. But, then again, maybe that's the point.

Answer 4

there is absolutly nothing wrong with it right now as long as the baby is being put in a crib or basinet and not sleeping in bed with you.
Right now, it is a lot easier with the baby nursing to have him so close to you, but you might want to start working with him sleeping in a different room no later then eight months. Otherwise, he is going to grow used to sleeping with you as well and will be extremely hard to break.

Answer 5

I did it with all three of mine until they were sleeping completely through the night. They are now happy and well adjusted big kids and I got my rest when I needed it so no it isn't bad. Just be careful about sleeping in the same bed. That can kill a baby.

Answer 6

My girls slept in the bed or room with us. The first one got her own room at 18 months, and the second one has a bed in our room still, and she is 3 years. Do what makes you comfortable as a mom. You know what is best for your child, other people dont. I always sleep better when I don't have to strain to hear the kids. I am afraid I will miss them when they need something important.

Answer 7

I kept my little guy RIGHT next to my side of the bed in a basinet for the first few months. I suggest a basinet because when they are that small there is a greater risk of suffocation from pillows, comforters, and even you rolling on him (I know it seems impossible, but sleep depravation can do wacky things to even the lightest sleeper). Anyway, then when he was about 6 months old we moved his crib into our room and at this age he would sleep with us half the time and in the crib half the time. We wanted him to get used to his crib before he was exiled (that’s what it felt like) to his room. Then finally when he was used to his crib it was time to move him to his own room. We knew it was time when our presence became more of a hindrance then a comfort. We would wake him up by snoring, going to the bathroom, coughing… you name it. And from then on he’s been happily sleeping in his room. We did the big move around 10-11 months or so, but every child is different of course. And another reader mentioned that in some cultures they sleep with their children in the same bed for MUCH longer, and that is true (sometimes until late teens). In the wild mother animals sleep with their young until they leave their mother’s care. It’s natural as far as I’m concerned. Even now our son (28 months old) still comes to our bed when need be (sick, lightning/thunder, too hot in his room, multiple nightmares, insomnia… you name it). Do what feels right to you. YOU are his mother. YOU know what’s best for the two of you. BTW… we still use a baby monitor as it is hard to hear him cry from our bedroom to his. Most people say to stop using a monitor before now, but my husband and I have decided to keep using it until he moves to a regular bed (around 4 or when ever he starts climbing out of the crib on his own) and can come get us by himself if need be. We feel better about it and we sleep better knowing we can easily hear him too. We even would have bought one of those camera monitors so as to watch him all night… if we could have afforded it. What is normal anyway? By who's standard?

Answer 8

I don't think there is anything wrong with this, I was the same way with my baby when she was that young. If your getting almost a whole night's sleep that is even a bigger benefit - some women don't for the first 6 months or sometimes longer! I think you're doing great!

Answer 9

No honey whatever makes you comfortable. My son is 3 months old and sleeps in his own room and I am constantly waking up thinking I hear him. Maybe I would get more sleep having him in my room but we just don't have the room. You do whatever makes you feel good. Parenting is following your gut don't let anyone tell you to not listen to your mothers intuition!

Answer 10

If it feels right to you, then Yes, It's normal. I'm happy to hear you are nursing your baby. I nursed both of mine and they both slept in my room. I always had one eye and one ear open during the night so it didn't matter if they were in my room or their own; I simply wanted them close to me. Don't be bothered or scared though, if he needs something- He will let you know.