why do you think some people are self-destructive? Do they actually like being that way?

Answer 1

As an ex-"cutter" I found it hard to get my emotions out and talk to people and many people also felt that way too. Self-mutilation is usually to try to cope with certain situation that may be found unbearable. It is not to commit suicide, and a lot of them hate being that way. They know it's wrong but they feel kind of sufficated if they don't find a way to cope. Most of them have low self esteems or very bad personal problems.

Hope I answer your question :)

Answer 2

Well, I think my self-destructive impulses come from totally absorbing a lot of abuse as a child to the point that I believed all the lies I was told about being worthless and a bad person and if I were better, my parents could be better parents. They expected me to stoop to their level and be immoral like them and...somehow things got twisted around and all the anger I felt turned inward. I didn't like being self-destructive, but I didn't feel like I had a choice. I thought that I didn't deserve to live and that I should be punished for daring to stay alive. Also, there was an aspect of being numb and wanting to feel something, anything, even if it was self-destructive.

I don't think people just decide to be self-destructive. The self-serving bias is very strong and usually leads people to avoid pain. But in mentally unhealthy people, it gets twisted. Like take addiction--it starts as somebody seeking relief from some problem through a substance or activity. But it gets to the point where the addict is totally ruled by the addiction and doesn't control the activity anymore. It gets more and more self-destructive with the less control the addict has. A happy, healthy person with perky little neurotransmitters firing properly wouldn't turn to a self-destructive activity to relieve stress, but their nature leads them to addiction and it just gets worse and worse until they quit or die. I guess they like the addiction at the beginning--it seems fun and a release, but I would say that the kind of person who becomes an addict has some problems and is not being merely self-indulgent or perverse. If somebody says that it's fun to be self-destructive, then that person is probably seriously mentally ill and doesn't have a good grip on the meaning of "fun."

Answer 3

All human beings are self destructive to a certain degree. Some are overly religious killing their intellect or letting it interfere with everyday life or give 10% of their income to the church when they can't afford it, some work out too much which can be harm full to the body. Some eat too much chocolate, some drink too much. Some read too much killing the time that could be spent with family or friends. It's all in how you look at it.

Answer 4

I don't think all self-destructive people want to be that way, although some honestly may, it's just either and escape from expressing feelings, or a cry for someone to listen, among other reasons.

Answer 5

I have suffered from this impulse nearly my entire life. Trying to explain it to someone that doesn't feel this way is almost impossible. Or so my doctors say. Anyway, I would say that in my case, it truly seems to be something like a death-wish. I find myself running down my "tear list" reviewing every terrible thing I've done in my life. Believe me, it's a long list. By the time I reach the end of it, I'm in the deepest of depression.
Like being this way? Surely you jest? Enjoy having these issues? Enjoy going to therapy every week, to try to work these problems out? Enjoy taking 20 DIFFERENT drugs to try and treat the problem?
If you have to ask that question, then you truly don't get it, and you never will.

Answer 6

They would rather fail on purpose than fail involuntarily. Self destructive acts temporarily relieve the anxiety brought on by the anticipation of eventual failure.

They didn't choose to be that way - their only choice seems to them to try to avoid a greater disaster by arranging for a smaller one to intervene.

Answer 7

No they don't, but some hate letting it out on others so they let it out on themselves, some do it for control, they feel they have no control over anything happening in their lives so they self mutilate to gain control of something, I used to do it, and I hated it afterwards, it didn't bother me when I actually did it, but the next day... I felt like a complete ***. I don't do that no more though.

Answer 8

The truth is they hate their selves and try to hurt themselves with pain on the outside to match the pain on the inside but they never succeed.

Answer 9

like, cutting you mean? I've had a few friends that had cut. They do it because the physical pain distracts them from things that they would rather not be thinking about [emotional pain].