my man for 4 yrs. don't want to take his pregant girlfriend to the doctor appointment and iam upset. i want my man to be there so i feel good and he says it is a woman's job to stay home, care for the 3 kids, cook, and clean. he says that he should only work and make money and i should do everything else by myself. what u think agree or disagree.
2006-07-19 09:12:45 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
first of all i have a bachelors degree, and i work a full time job. my kids are from a previous relationship and i have been supporting them and working hard for them, so my point is, this is the way my man is.
2006-07-19 09:23:28 · update #1
I think different households have different agreements in place as to a division of labor.
If you're not in agreement with staying home doing the domestic chores, then get a job and stop doing all the household work.
This is a negotiation between two people. Don't give HIM all the power to make the decision and stand up for what kind of role you want for yourself.
Of course, 3 + kids DO need a lot of hands-on attention, so obviously you did intend to spend a lot of time at home. Why do you keep having kids if you don't want to stay at home and take care of them?
If you don't want to be a stay-at-home mom, then go out, get a job, and hire a nanny. And stop having so many kids. And if you want him to be more hands-on at home, then negotiate that with him. Kids DO need two parental influences. And whether he can take you to a doctor's appointment would depend on whether his job will allow him the time off. Why can't you drive yourself?
2006-07-19 09:18:38 · answer #1 · answered by lily 4 · 5⤊ 1⤋
While I totally disagree with your boyfriend on soooooooooo many levels you probably knew all about that when you chose to have his child. You are having child #4 and this is the father you picked. It is a little late to start think about this stuff now. Use the things that have gotten you through so far.
2006-07-19 17:49:24 · answer #2 · answered by Suesan W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the point of a relationship isn't to do everything yourself!!! I would think that your man would want to be with you at the Dr's office to experience that part of the new life YA'LL are bringing into the world. You didn't make the baby yourself so you shouldn't have to do everything yourself!!!
I hope that you can change his mind about what his duties are in the relationship...otherwise I'd say he's a loser and get rid of him!
2006-07-19 16:52:34 · answer #3 · answered by itsjustme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your man is a sexist, chauvanistic jerk living in the 1920's. Damn straight he should go with you! It's HIS kid too! Plus he's supposed to be there to support you, that's what a REAL man does.
If he's not going to do that, then he's not a real man, and you need to find one that can support you in OTHER ways than just money. Money isn't enough. He has to be MORE than that. He should help you out, he should help with the kids, and be involved in pregnancy and parenting.
2006-07-19 16:18:20 · answer #4 · answered by Guppy Geek 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was with my ex for 3 years....his opinions were the same as your mans....i was pregnant and out came that side of him so i left him....im sorry but i dont agree that the women are supposed to be barefoot and pregnant while taking care of the other kids, cooking, cleaning and basicly catering to her man for her entire life....that is just so last centry and im not amish so i didnt go for it....some women do but i think it's degrading and discriminatory towards us women....we should be able to work and make our own money and be able to have our husbands help around the house when we need them to. I left my ex bc he believed in that....i married another man who agrees with me...and acts on it...if you dont agree with your man...find another bc they wont change!
2006-07-19 16:20:55 · answer #5 · answered by gaigesmommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it sounds like your boyfriend is a jerk and definitely a male chauvinist pig to say the least!!!
It sounds like you are going to be very unhappy with this guy.
Good luck Babe!!
Sorry you are with such a jerk.
2006-07-19 16:17:06 · answer #6 · answered by krYpToNitEsMoM 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm hi, it's 2006, not 1956. Totally disagree with the loser.
2006-07-19 16:17:05 · answer #7 · answered by nicolehope 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
disagree!! right now man and woman are the same they can earn both, they have to share the household chores.
its man job to do cleaning too....If you love each other you wont let your partner to be slave.
2006-07-19 16:20:23 · answer #8 · answered by dreamer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Continue to do for you and your kids... Make use of your degree... You dont want to become too dependent on anyone else... Dont give him that power.... its a give... Come on you didnt get your degree for nothing...
2006-07-19 16:37:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ANY MAN CAN FATHER A CHILD BUT IT TAKES A SPECIAL MAN TO BE A DADDY!!!!!!
HE IS A MORON AND NEEDS TO BE KICKED REALLY HARD INTO THE REALITY OF THIS CENTURY AND THIS TIME>THINGS HAVE CHANGED AND HE NEEDS TO CHANGE WITH THE TIMES
2006-07-19 16:48:54 · answer #10 · answered by leoslady3900 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋