My wife wants to have a baby and I don't have any sperm. should we use a donor?

Question

My wife wants to have a baby and I don't have any sperm. We can't afford the $4k that it cost to go through the donor program. So we are thinking of getting a doner to do it the old fashioned way. Is it considered adultery if I am present?

We have tried other options such as other programs. and they all cost more than can afford. @ I have three kids from a previous marriage that are grown.3 I can't adopt because my ex filed a bunch frivolous domestic abuse claims when I was married to her. and even though they were unfounded they are still there. and atleast this way one of will still be the biological parent

Answer 1

It's only cheating if that's what is in your head instead of a baby.

If you can find someone already in a relationship, ask for all health records, and make sure it is not someone you know, I think it's worth a shot as long as all of you are agreed. A swingers club might help. They have sex with other couples and are discreet and non-commital. Someone might go for it. Make sure you find a lawyer to draw up some papers explaining the other guys role and responsibilities after conception. You don't want Mr. Donor coming around in a few years saying he has rights.

Just a thought, if you can't afford $4k, then can you really afford a baby?

Answer 2

Yes, it is adultery. Because you are not the one who created the natural law, you have no right to try to circumvent the natural law. God does not say, "Do not commit adultery--unless it is OK with all of the parties involved." He is unequivocal: "Do not commit adultery." Unless you have sociopathic tendencies, you are hard-wired to find adultery (regardless of motive or what you call it) deeply offensive. You might imagine that it will be OK, but the reality will be much different.

Imagine, how will you feel if they have to have sex multiple times (as is often the case with even fully fertile couples). Do you really want another man to become "as one flesh" with your wife? What happens when she finds that she enjoys it? How will you feel, standing by while your your wife an another man sweat and groan in pleasure?

I love my children, and having a family with children is the best thing that I can imagine. Pray to find out what God would have you do in this situation (and I can assure you that it is not to have someone else have sex with your wife).

Answer 3

I rather do no longer comprehend your pondering even as you're saying "only desire her to maintain to our contract of the noted infant and no bio-infant." yet, you also acknowledged you probably did not favor to any volume further babies---so what may be the reason of adopting, that may be somewhat one/infant?? Then on your statement, why is it okay to undertake notwithstanding now no longer have a bio-infant? a infant is a infant and that i visit se why your better half may desire man or woman who she has carried. only bypass get it reversed, persons do it in any respect situations, if it does no longer artwork then you honestly'll keep in recommendations diverse determination yet in case you do not desire one extra infant then you honestly definately might want to now no longer have one so as that you'll guard an part of living!!! the justifications you gave are not factors you may want to keep in recommendations having a infant instead you undertake or it is bio. As for the donor sperm, persons attempt this in any respect situations, I see no longer some thing flawed with it in case you won't be able to produce one on your own.

Answer 4

whoa.
don't you dare watch your wife having sex with another man. it'll freak you out for the rest of your life. anyway, what if she doesn't get pregnant the first (or second, or eighth) month? how many times are you gonna be in the room while she has sex with this guy? DON'T DO IT!

you can have a friend donate sperm without him having sex with your wife.

he's in a room, alone (maybe with some magazines). ejaculates into a cup. you QUICKLY take the stuff, use a syringe or turkey baster, or whatever, and inseminate your wife. it's not as foolproof as actual sex, but it will work eventually.

good luck!

Answer 5

I know people that have done this,only trouble is the donor might claim the child,better get legal advise or a signed doc that this is what had transpired between all concerned,this protects all involved,get it certified too,that way no confusion can come from the agreement

Answer 6

there are other programs that will help with IVF or donor that some may provide low or no cost I would search around for a fertility clinic and find your best option before you send her off into your friends arms. You never know what might happen.

Answer 7

It isn't adultery if you okay it but are you going to be okay with another man on your wife? You could always adopt that way you both get the baby and no one has to screw your wife. It's something to think about. Wishing the best to you both♥

Answer 8

yes it's still adultery. Remember the story of Abraham and Sarah and Hagar. Why dont you try adoption. Maybe you dont have sperm for a reason...perhaps you were meant to adopt.

Answer 9

I know someone in the same situation. What they did, is have the guy ejaculate in a jar, and then they used a syringe and put it in the woman. She got pregnant after the 2nd time. It would be better than the old fashioned way.

Answer 10

Hey what a great idea for a Reality Show!!! It could be called "Screw My Wife"

Seriously tho, if your wife wants a baby but you can't impregnate her, tell her she can't have one. Why would you want to let someone screw your wife? You must be a real wimp, I bet she's just saying that she wants a baby 'cause she knows you can't give her one, thus giving her the go ahead to screw other dudes on your dime.