Suggestions of how to satisfy my wife (women over 20 only!)?

Question

We have been married for 5 years now. I love my wife and want to satisfy her in every way, including in bed. Ofcouse, with each year of marriage, you have to be careful not to let sex just become routine. When I ask her if she enjoyed our love making, she always says yes, but I want to know if there's anything I could do to make her go crazy. She's probably too shy to tell me. Any suggestions from MATURE women only please?

Thank you all for your suggestions. For those that say I need to talk to her about it, I totally agree. As I have said, she is very shy about the subject and I've come a long way with making her feel comfortable enough to even talk a little about it. I will continue to work on that. But as for why am I asking strangers, I think this is the only environment that I could have this conversation. I would never talk about our private details with people that know us. The anonymity of the internet allows you to have serious discussion about something personal without embarrassing anyone. Thanks again.

Answer 1

Since I'm a granny, I think I'm mature enough to answer this question. OK...here is the thing most men don't realize. If you want great sex that night, you have to start planning early that day. When she gets up in the morning, hold her a while...fix her lunch with a nice love note in it; call her during the day and ask how she's feeling. When you get home, focus all of your attention on her (not in a sexual way)....run a bubble bath for her, a glass of wine....just show her alot of attention and she will be yours for the night. When you're making love ask: do you like it like this, or like this? Show me how you like it. Do you like this touch or this one...show me how you want me to touch you. Do you like this sort of kiss, or this one...now, you show me how you want to be kissed.

It's nice that you really want to please your wife. You're a good guy. All you have to do is pay attention and ask at the right time. Good luck to you both!

Answer 2

Sometimes even the closest couples have a hard time communicating about sex. It's definitely an area where you don't want to hurt someone's feelings.

I'm a Passion Parties Independent Consultant, and I talk to a LOT of women and couples that have the same concerns that you do. I know many women that would be happy to have a husband so concerned about their pleasure.

Maybe it's time for you to just take the initiative and introduce something new. It doesn't have to be anything too wild. Passion Parties carries many things that are quite tame, but can initiate conversation and new exploration in relationships. From things like a book on Sexual Positions or Erotic Massage, to White Chocolate Body Powder and a blindfold, or a flavored massage cream, there are lots of ways to find out if there's something more she'd like. Browse a website or catalog together and see if there's anything that catches your eyes! Of course there's a wide variety of things out there, so she might find something that would surprise you. OR, find something yourself, and surprise her! Again, if you're not sure of her reaction, start small and tame and work your way up. You know her best, so you should be able to find something that you'll both enjoy.

Exploring adult products does NOT mean that there's anything wrong with your relationship. Like you said, after a few years, you have to work to keep things from becoming routine. Even the best relationships can use a little spice and variety from time to time, and that's what Passion Parties products are about.

Honesty and communication are very important. Good luck to you! I am open to professional questions regarding this subject, Hosting a Passion Party, or the Passion Parties consultant opportunity.

Answer 3

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There's no easy answer to this. Do you really want to open this can of worms? You're not the jealous type, but will that hold true if she has a great time with her one night stand? You better be damn sure of yourself if you're going to let her sleep with younger men. Especially since it sounds like she's actually looking for an on going affair. Do you really want to share her with another man? There's also another possibility here. She's asking for your help to see how you react. If you really are willing to let her sleep around, she might start to wonder about your commitment to her. After all, if monogamy is not that important to you, it's only a matter of time before you stray. I would suggest instead that you get her to talk to her friends about sex more openly. Get some feedback from other women on their experiences. Maybe even get some new ideas for things to try with you. Maybe she can satisfy her curiosity without actually experimenting. In the end, it's up to you if you want to allow her this experience. But just be aware of the possible consequences.

Answer 4

If you use lots of your imagination she must be very satisfied... if you dont jump in the routine, if you take her by surprise, if you get her lingerie.... if you take her out here and there and make her feel you really desire, if you last longuer than 1 minute, if you use different approach with her not always the same touch at the same place... at the same time..... well you have a very satisfied wife and you should just keep doing what you are already doing....

And dont be shy to try new stuff with her... that doesnt necessarly involve other poeple i mean just between her and you....

ps i am 37 and married can tell you alot about marriage and sex...

Answer 5

I have to applaud your desire to make sure she's satisfied, but FIRST AND FOREMOST you have to remember that if she doesn't tell you she wants something, it's not your fault for not giving it to her! Unless you aren't giving her the opportunity to tell her - it sounds like you are, but you may occasionally need to be more specific. She can't request a technique of which she's never heard, after all...

Since it sounds like you're just looking for generic suggestions, I'll recommend a book called "Tricks" (if there's a local sex shop in your area, by all means patronize them and see if they carry it, otherwise you should be able to find it online). Once upon a time, somebody went around collecting people's suggestions, just like you seem to want to be doing, and put 125 of them into a book along with some pretty good advice on how to use them - the most important suggestion being "don't get so caught up in executing the Trick that you forget to enjoy the moment with your partner".

Oh, and if you ever played a brass instrument in high school or college, you've got a very nice technique in your repertoire already. Forgive me if I don't get more explicit than "practice your arpeggios on her". ;)

Answer 6

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RE:
Suggestions of how to satisfy my wife (women over 20 only!)?
We have been married for 5 years now. I love my wife and want to satisfy her in every way, including in bed. Ofcouse, with each year of marriage, you have to be careful not to let sex just become routine. When I ask her if she enjoyed our love making, she always says yes, but I want to know if...

Answer 7

Find a book called "Nice Couples Do" by Joan Elizabeth Lloyd.It is a book with true sexual stories about couples who may be too shy too say what they want or ask what they want for fear of embarassment from their partner.What you do is give her the book and tell her to find a story that she likes and maybe would like to try herself and bookmark it for you.You could do the same for her.That way you're reading it privately and can see what the other one may be interested in.What is so cool about this book is that the communication really opened up between the couples after doing this.An example was a husband would like to see his wife strip for him but was too shy to ask.Another was an older man liked to look at lingerie but was afraid to ask his wife to dress up in the outfits he liked.Some were a little mild and some were more risque but all in all the just reading the stories can set the mood.You can go to a local book store or go to eBay books.Buy it and read it and then gift wrap it and give to her as a gift letting her know how much you love her and want to please her.I know for many women just the thoughtfulness of your gesture would be a major turn on.

Answer 8

This is hard to give advice on due to the fact that the intimate details are not (nor should they be) known to random people over the internet. And it would waste time asking 'have you tried....' over and over again. Suggestion: go to a sex store and see if there is anything you want to try. There's no better place to conjoure up ideas than a store completely and fully devoted to sex. Novels and movies are always a fun beginner, but there are also cremes, furniture, etc. that can make the love making more involved, longer and more fun.

Answer 9

I can say from experience, i know what your wife is going through. Im really shy, and for a long time, I had a hard time telling my fiance my opinions on anything, especially when it came to sex. What worked for us was for starters, trying to talk about it. Talking helped us come a long way, and we learned a hell of alot of each other that we never knew (a few things I rather have not learned, but hey, we can laugh about it LOL) then.... my fiance went to the p-o-r-n shop and bought a few different toys. At first I was really shy, wanted nothing to do with it, but now, our sex life is better then it has EVER been. my fiance and i now have a better relationship, in every aspect. You would be surprised at how alittle bit of talking can work wonders.

Good luck and best wishes.

Answer 10

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Answer 11

I applaud the effort, well done. You can read up in magazines and on the internet and stuff (Kama sutra is great), if you think she's shy then you can watch a steamy movie together (not porn).
However you must be careful not to go overboard or too far out of her comfort zone: wild n' sexy sometimes translates into awkward, ridiculous and just plain uncomfortable.
But to me the greatest aphrodisiac of all is the assurance that my husband loves me and gets intense pleasure from me as well.