How can Singaporeans educate their children to deal with life rather than just to pass examinations?

Question

Answers staff note: This is the real Morris Allen from Morris Allen Study Centres! To take part in the Y!ureka contest for a chance to win Dopod phones, register at http://yahoo.com.sg/answers

Answer 1

The best education Singaporean parents can give to their children to deal with life is to live as role models and inspire their children to live a good life.

Singaporeans should instill courage and hope in the minds of their children and bring them up with full awareness to the hardships in life one needs to face. They must make them aware life seems to be a bed of roses but in actuality covered thorns underneath needs to be tackled.

Answer 2

They should not potray a rat race image such that children study fearing that they might not have a job next time. Moreover, there are many things to think of in life than exams if we were to widen our views. Next, schools should start a more all rounded education. Take the recent sex education for example, this is one way to allow children to learn some parts of life. However, the problem with Singaporeans is that they only find a solution when a problem arise, they do not anticipate issues. Schools is where students start searching for their passion and interest than to pass exams. Lastly, the education that parents give their children should not be neglected. Parents have the responsibility of the upbringing of the child as well as his ability to face life. Yet parents have been stressing their children about results and do not bother about their welfare.
In conclusion, life is a very general word that could apply to many other things. Still, children in Singapore have not been seeing or enjoying life that children should have. If there is no changes being made, these children who only know books will pose a bigger problem for Singapore in future.

Answer 3

The first good thing to do is take away the emphasis that doing well in school is the only way to secure a well-paying job. That is what my mother did and I am very very sure that I am not alone. However, it's not their fault for coming out with such an equation. Our parents have experienced the growing pace of Singapore, from a shabby post-war island (stone me if I am using the wrong choice of words) to a mighty metropolis today. They are the ones who saw how years ago, the O level certificate was the key to many job opportunities but now worth almost nothing on the resume. Parents always want to best for their children (and for their own too!) and would probably do whatever within their reach to grill the idea of good results = good future into their children heads. Growing with such an idea in our head, we may grill the same ideology into our children and thus, beginning the circle of 'life'. In Singapore this century, it's just seems logical that the strongest survives (getting well-paying jobs) while the weakest washes the toilet (pun intended). See how serious parents take the whole kindergarten and primary school rankings and how people still taunt ITE as It's The End??

It could be an Asian thing that we are more conservative and we keep everything (good and bad) to ourselves. I don't remember my parents sharing their life experience with me. When they do, it's usually about how they live when they were young. My father didn't relate any of his business experience as a capable hawker or my mother as a good wife to me or my sisters. Whatever it is, it seems comforting to know how we may have shared the same adolescent turmoil or business failures. It is definitely helpful to know how what did they do within their powers to tackle these problems. I feel that Singaporeans can help educate their children to deal with life by opening up to their children. Admit that they were young before and that they have commit mistakes. Don't only be a signature, an ATM or a lecturer to your children. Show them that having good results is important but growing and learning outside the textbooks are also important. Give them a little freedom to explore life and learn what's life outside their comfort zone. Being street-smart is not a bad thing too. Of course, lay some ground rules/values to keep them from getting into troubles too deep for them to handle.

Answer 4

Singaporean children face a major problem of being buried in books. I believe this is due to the fast pace society and intense competition by peers. Myopic cases have been rising among children as well. This is a sad fact of life then children do not have their childhood.
Having gone through Singapore's education system, I feel that students feel very pressurized. Of cos my two cents worth of opinion might be a long term process but no harm voicing it out. First of all, changes must be made in society. They should not potray a rat race image such that children study fearing that they might not have a job next time. Moreover, there are many things to think of in life than exams if we were to widen our views. Next, schools should start a more all rounded education. Take the recent sex education for example, this is one way to allow children to learn some parts of life. However, the problem with Singaporeans is that they only find a solution when a problem arise, they do not anticipate issues. Schools is where students start searching for their passion and interest than to pass exams. Lastly, the education that parents give their children should not be neglected. Parents have the responsibility of the upbringing of the child as well as his ability to face life. Yet parents have been stressing their children about results and do not bother about their welfare.
In conclusion, life is a very general word that could apply to many other things. Still, children in Singapore have not been seeing or enjoying life that children should have. If there is no changes being made, these children who only know books will pose a bigger problem for Singapore in future.

Answer 5

No child is born with an innate focus on passing examinations only. This mentality is more often than not inculcated on the child by the parents.
The best way parents can educate their children is to lead by example. Children tend to mirror their parents' actions as they look up to them. They are also forced to be focused on examinations in order to please their demanding parents. Which child would not choose play over studies if given a free choice?
Parents themselves should take a step back, appreciate the other aspects of life, their children may learn to do the same as well. At the end of each day, parents could share with their children how they handle their day's situations and problems, whether at work or personal life.
If parents do not place top emphasis on their children excelling in examinations, their children would not be that obsessed with examinations and lose out on appreciating the other joys of life that a child should be entitled to.

Answer 6

While formal education is an important part of a person's life in learning how to use critical thinking and exercise our reasoning powers not forgetting gaining knowledge, it is also important that society and the educational system should place equal emphasis on other values, be it moral, spiritual or EQ development. The current system is an over-emphasis on being no. 1 in everything. But we know in reality, there can only be one winner while the rest loses out. How meaningful is it to chase after this no. 1 status, and how long can it last?

Firstly, it won't be easy for Singaporeans to change from their current psyche unless the Government realises the importance of the above stated values, and take a lead in reforming/overhaul the educational system. As we can observe, Singaporeans are relatively trustful and "obedient" to any initiatives by the government. As it flow downwards, Singaporeans' thinking might change, collectively. Successful campaigns so far include "Speak English", "Speak Mandarin", Mozzie wipe-out (campaign against dengue fever), "Singapore's OK" (campaign in containing SARS breakout) and so on.

Secondly, Singaporeans would have to face the stigma of being different if they were to adopt their own education programme for their children. However, if parents are brave enough they can actually take their children off the system from secondary sch onwards, and design their own education prgoramme with a good mix of academic training and imparting social values. There are Singaporeans who are already doing this, yet maintaining a good balance between academic and social values and skills.

It will take alot of wisdom, courage and time to change our deep-rooted kiasu-ism psyche. To achieve that balance might mean forgoing the obsession to be always no. 1. What would Singaporeans choose?

Just my two cents' worth.

Answer 7

Well, Morris...that is a rather tough question to answer. But I shall try. I am a mother of two and am perplexed at the distance some parents would go to make their children pass exams. As a result, these children grow up going to school without experiencing the joy and purpose of learning. I am an educator and I know the looks in their eyes when I start talking about an issue that is NOT examinable - disinterest. I do not want my kids to grow up like that - so, experiential learning is the way for me. To deal with life well, one needs strength of character. Perseverance, creativity, levelheadedness and a gracious attitude are important characteristics for me. How do I educate them on this? Never say "cannot"...even if they were to colour a crocodile blue, yellow and purple. ; ) That even if you fail an exam, you may succeed in life. And, by not comparing my children with the rest.

Answer 8

I have always believed that all strong buildings point towards a strong base/foundation. The same case as for the nurturing of a child. If since young the parent had taken a wrong step towards this nurturing of the child, in the later stages of the childs life, it would be virtually impossible to rectify this sticky situation.

I feel that Singaporean parents tend to give their children too much pressure in the early stages of their life through numerous tuitions and the tons of assignment papers to do over their already piling school homework. And the all so familiar phrase almost all Singaporeans get to hear from their parents when they were young, "You better study hard and do well for your exams, otherwise in future you will be NOTHING".

I think parents instead should encourage their children to explore and try out the things they wanna do when young, as thats the best time to learn new things and make mistakes. Of course i am not advocating that education is not important. Life is not all about education. Just think about it, in the end, a degree is just a piece of paper acknowledging your hard work and efforts for the past.. lets see.. 15 to 20 years. But out there, we have to deal with problems neer would be taught in the textbooks (i.e relationships, conflicts, competition, backstabbing, networking.. etc etc).

So Singaporeans should let their child be exposed to these elements earlier in their lives, to prepare them for the harsh reality, rather then bury them in grades and textbooks and not disillusioning them that an ideal world exists out there, only to find out when its too late.

Answer 9

This is a tough one. If nine out of ten parents educate their children just to pass the exams with flying colours, you do not want to be the one educating about life, and not getting good grades.

This is a problem for society, and the government will need to re-align their purpose for the education system in Singapore. For the last two generations, we have all been programmed from school , to study hard, get good examination grades, to get a good job in order to be successful.

It is a difficult process to change this mindset now after forty years of the same program that has done Singapore proud as we are in the international standing as a country in economic terms.
But are we as successful in the other side of the coin, have we become a nation of robots without emotion, and just like a mechanical bring throughout our life.

We will need everyone to be more resourceful, and everyone must know that there is a bigger picture in life than passing examinations. The leaders must set the example by promoting alternative means as a measure of success instead of merely on the exams, like success in the pursuit in sports, or the arts etc..

Answer 10

It could be an Asian thing that we are more conservative and we keep everything (good and bad) to ourselves. I don't remember my parents sharing their life experience with me. When they do, it's usually about how they live when they were young. My father didn't relate any of his business experience as a capable hawker or my mother as a good wife to me or my sisters. Whatever it is, it seems comforting to know how we may have shared the same adolescent turmoil or business failures. It is definitely helpful to know how what did they do within their powers to tackle these problems. I feel that Singaporeans can help educate their children to deal with life by opening up to their children. Admit that they were young before and that they have commit mistakes. Don't only be a signature, an ATM or a lecturer to your children. Show them that having good results is important but growing and learning outside the textbooks are also important. Give them a little freedom to explore life and learn what's life outside their comfort zone. Being street-smart is not a bad thing too. Of course, lay some ground rules/values to keep them from getting into troubles too deep for them to handle.

Answer 11

Being a parent, what we notice is that we first teach our children social etiquette e.g. greeting people with 'Hello Uncle/Aunty', opening door for people, saying 'Thank you', etc.. Along the way new teaching come about when we go somewhere new e.g. going to restaurants - the dos and donts. Still it is based around social etiquette. Unfortunately not all parents have these social skills so their kids are not taught - hence the governments Courtesy campaign. I remembered when my 6 yr old son held the door open for someone; that person simply walked through without saying anything. After the person left, my son asked 'How come the Uncle didn't say Thank you.'

Teaching your children about life also depends on your own moral values and experiences. My spouse and I are still learning and we expect to keep learning until death probably. Fortunately we are Christians so we do have a life application manual which we can use - The Bible. There are a lot of life experiences detailed and methods on how to deal with certain situations e.g. we are teaching our children to just be grateful for having what we have now and for being healthy.

The parents profession will also dictate what kind of life skills you teach your children. I'm both in IT and Financial Planning, so our children are taught basic computing skills and about saving before spending and how you can get income e.g. the older son is given some house chores to earn money.

What it boils down to is really how experienced and what kind of values the parents have that will dictate how their children will view and deal with life. From some of the encounters with parents, their children may be better off being taught by someone else :)