Is the relationship flawed from day one ? Is it lack of true love ? Or is most relationship a classic permanent decision made in temporary circumstances ?
2006-07-18 19:53:06 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
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Causes of divorce
An annual study in the UK by management consultants Grant Thornton, estimates the main causes of divorce based on surveys of matrimonial lawyers (see [6]).
The main causes in 2004 (2003) were:
Extra-marital affairs - 27% (29%)
Family strains - 18% (11%)
Emotional/physical abuse - 17% (10%)
Mid-life crisis - 13% (not in 2003 survey)
Addictions, e.g. alcoholism and gambling - 6% (5%)
Workaholism - 6% (5%)
According to this survey, men engaged in extra-marital affairs in 75% (55%) of cases; women in 25% (45%). In cases of family strain, women's families were the primary source of strain in 78%, compared to 22% of men's families.
Emotional and physical abuse were more evenly split, with women affected in 60% and men in 40% of cases. In 70% of workaholism-related divorces it was men who were the cause, and 30% women. The 2004 survey found that 93% of divorce cases were petitioned by women, very few of which were contested.
53% of divorces were of marriages that had lasted 10 to 15 years, with 40% ending after 5 to 10 years. The first 5 years are relatively divorce-free, and if a marriage survives more than 20 years it is unlikely to end in divorce.
Regarding divorce settlements, as defined by this survey women obtained a better or considerably better settlement than men in 60% of cases. In 30% of cases the assets were split 50-50, and in only 10% of cases did men achieve better settlements (down from 24% the previous year). The 2004 report concluded that campaigns like that of Fathers 4 Justice must succeed in increasing the percentage of shared residence orders, in order for more equitable financial divisions to become the norm.
2006-07-18 19:59:33 · answer #1 · answered by mallimalar_2000 7 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Most marriages that end in divorce is due to problems with finances and/or infidelity.
Are relationships "flawed" from day one? Yes, but it's how you and your spouse deal with those flaws - regardless of whose flaws they are - that will either make the marriage succeed or fail. However it's the "flaws", these imperfections, that can make any relationship great.
I am very fortunate that where my flaws exist, those are my wife's strongest characteristics ( I have an extremely bad temper and am a bit of a perfectionist). And the same can be said for my wife (She is a very trusting person, and has had a tendency to be "burned" by her acts of kindness). It's these "flaws", these peck-a-dillos, that make me love and appreciate my wife every day.
A secret of a successful marriage is finding someone who not only good TO you, but good FOR you as well.
2006-07-18 20:05:12 · answer #2 · answered by GottaGo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been married for 17 yrs (plus 7 yrs we lived together before marriage). I feel like we have one heck of a huge bond together. But... we do have our problems, not able to work em all out either. Some just gotta be accepted. I think it's all in the heart and how hard you both try. If it's something you want you stride for it. fight for it. Speed bump after speed bump. We've been to 4 councelors, didnt do any good we were told to divorce. We worked it out on our own.
2006-07-18 20:39:22 · answer #3 · answered by queenlionus 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dissolving an agreement on paper vs. Adulterous conceptions
The term "settling" comes to the forefront when ppl "marry"
Ironically the happiest marriages I know of are not bound in church but in doing by Ladies and Gentlemen who don't rely on promises but live in the day to day.
:) Ppl were partnered and paired looooong before the institutions of court, church, or priests.
In short a marriage that is forced and forged in "I do" that was never an "I did", is doomed from the first uttered "I.."
Ask a truly happily married couple if their pledge 1 day long ago keeps them strong or is it the pledge they carry on daily and to the present that keeps them goin stronger.
2006-07-18 20:11:51 · answer #4 · answered by Clint P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People change and no one is perfect. There are flaws in every marriage. Its depends on how willing both parties to work things out, compromise, forgive and forget. This require deep committment and constant reminder why do they get married at the first place.
2006-07-18 20:06:33 · answer #5 · answered by Pickles 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is lack of commitment. Our grandparents stayed married 30,40, even 60 years. They took the good with the bad. This younger generation uses marriage like gum. Chew it up and spit it out.
2006-07-18 19:59:16 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
most married couples either allow themselves to fall in anger over their significant other's problems and habits. One of the promises made in marriage is the "for richer or poorer, in sickness & in health" line. I can bet most married couples often forget that.
2006-07-18 19:59:48 · answer #7 · answered by shadow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's lack of compromise, trust, and love in most cases. To have one you have to have all, and most people carry their baggage with them and are unable to be happy with anyone.
2006-07-18 19:56:47 · answer #8 · answered by heidielizabeth69 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lack of communication
2006-07-18 20:12:02 · answer #9 · answered by cmac 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because of the no right decision
2006-07-18 19:55:02 · answer #10 · answered by ice cream with chocolate 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋