something wrong with me?

Question

i am surrounded by a great group of friends, and yet every day, every moment, there is an overwhelming loneliness, so bad it physically hurts sometimes. and every week there's some new rumor goin round that im goin out with some different guy (small town) like no one can figure it out and that in itself is wrong(the single-ness). is there something wrong with me?

Answer 1

You have the symptoms i have. You have depression. i have been trying on my own to beat it, but it has not been easy. And if your anything like me, no one can tell because i am always telling jokes and with a smile on my face. It sometimes works to bring my spirit up. If you have the means you think about going to the doctor just be careful about the kind of medication they want to give you. Sometimes all you need is an ear to talk to. But i know that is hard to come by.

Answer 2

It is a fool that calls loneliness a form of self-pity; and, fools that take that line are the type who cannot entertain the thought that they have more mush between their ears than knowledge... If things are rotten, then calling them rotten is not self-pity. As far as anything being "wrong" with you, the answer is a resounding "YES"--- but, that is a qualified answer; because, you have a lot of good company, since there's 'something wrong' with us all! Hey--- welcome to the world. What? Did you think WE were perfect? SURELY YOU JEST! Those who proclaim to never be lonely are all eaten-up with themselves, leaving no room for anyone else! Loneliness is a real thing; but, you need to know--- it is not the ONLY thing... Sometimes, the hardest thing in life to say is, "O-K". If things get sloppy, then they're sloppy... If things pick up, then they've picked up; but, just because a few fish in an isolated pond decide to act as though they've got a handle on the world that you don't understand doesn't mean that they could survive in the ocean of the world. When you look at the size of the pond, the big fish there are only big in relation to that set of circumstances. When you find a way to redirect your focus onto something other than what seems to be problematic, you'll discover a world in which bombs are not falling on you and you don't have to fear soldiers invading your house in the middle of the night--- and the grass is growing, and the birds are singing, and the sun is threatening to burn right through you. It's then that you can get a glimpse of those things that are okay, and know that you're as much a part of them as they are of you--- and that's okay, too...The next time you think of something being 'wrong' about yourself, think about something else not perfect--- like a lop-eared rabbit... It's kinda hard to think such 'wrong' is cute; but, it IS a fact. And remember: God didn't make but one of you, and you're it--- Don't muss it up--- it's the only one we got...

Answer 3

Hmmm... tough one without knowing you, but here goes:

1. If you are a teenager, then believe it or not what you describe sounds normal! Hang in there, bear the pain and you WILL grow out of it.

2. If you are past your teens, it sounds like you may be suffering from depression. A doctor can assess whether medication could help.

I'm not a doc, but I can offer a few suggestions and words of encouragement:

1. Surround yourself with positive and inspiring thoughts. Read inspiring books, watch upbeat/inspiring movies, and listen to songs with positive lyrics. We live in a world where crap surrounds us (soap operas, violent movies, celebrity gossip, etc) Keep the crap out of your brain. Here are a few inspiring movies to lift your spirit:

Dead Poet's Society
Stand By Me
Shawshank Redemption
Radio
Fried Green Tomatoes
October Sky

2. If you do drugs or too much alcohol, stop. I know its easier said than done, but these substances affect your mood.

3. Find somone, one person, who you can talk to and trust not to blab it around. Maybe a pastor, priest, counsellor, or senior citizen. Just being able to "get it out" helps a lot.

4. Volunteer your time. For some reason doing nice things for other people is just a natural "pick me up".

5. As a drastic measure, consider shaking up your routine. You may be stuck in a rut. Have you considered moving to a new City? Changing careers/jobs? Anything is possible that you want to do! Worst case scenario, take what savings you have, but a bus/train ticket to a big city and see what happens. Most people never really strike out and try something different.

6. Daily exercise that gets your heart rate up - even a good brisk walk - releases "endorphins" in your system which are nature's own "happy drug"!! If you aren't an athlete, just start with what you can do (walking, jogging, treadmill, stairs, whatever). Gradually increase the intesity and frequency of your workout. In addition to those happy endorphins, just getting in better shape will help you look and feel better.

7. Regarding the rumors, those people are small and petty. Who knows why they have a need to spread rumors, but it just shows you that other people have problems too! Forgive them in your heart so that anger and hatred don't take root and fester.

Well, good luck and keep your chin up!

Answer 4

Well, I don't have a medical or psychiatric degree but I think you can relax a little bit. You sound a lot like me... lonely in a crowd. Not all the time as you describe, but often. I don't know what the professionals would call it but i don't think you are in danger. Of course you could get a professional opinion if you would feel better. As I said you seem to feel that way more than I do. But I wouldn't say there is something wrong with you.
With all that said, is there someone you love or miss? Have you thought that maybe it could be God calling you? Have you recently lost someone? I'm just throwing out some options to think about.
Talk to God about it. I know, I know... but really, it's worth a try. He might surprise you. Even if it's not Him you're "missing" He may be able to help you sort it out. Just ask Him about it next time you have some time alone.

Answer 5

No, that happened to me a long time ago. I took some time to myself and found out that I feel much better when I'm alone than when I'm around other people. It takes all of the pressure off. Somehow the loneliness went away when i was alone. I just felt more at home. Now i do have friends but only just a few. I recommend that you just take as long as you need, to be just by yourself and to think about what you really feel and what you really want. You will figure it all out on your own. It just takes time.

Answer 6

No there is nothing wrong with you. Maybe you just don't feel like your a part of the crowd have you tried interacting more with your friends if that's not it then try getting out of the small town for a while. It could be closing in on you. Try something new.

Answer 7

Most people have those kinds of feelings at times. I remember when I was in the Peace Corps in the Central African Republic that I felt terribly lonely at times although I was going through some very exciting experiences.

You have a very important strength: your group of good friends. Stupid people who have nothing better to do spread vicious rumors but you shouldn't worry about them since people know what kind of people they are.

Lately I have been the victim of vicious rumors and people even have insulted me to my face which gives me an urge to...well, I won't go on about that. But what has helped me is knowing that in a war you have to pick your battles.

There are times when, even if someone insulted you to your face, you should walk away since those evil people probably just want you to react so that they can say that you must be guilty.

Often just giving them a dirty look and walking away will show them and other people who may be watching that you know they are scum, and you wouldn't waste your breath talking to them.

Often rumors start because someone sees something which he/she doesn't understand. Then the stupid gossip mongers spread it around but people around you won't believe it usually. If they do, it is very unfair but you can clear up the problem by talking to your friends and family.

Sometimes you can easily just tell someone something like: that is really stupid--I don't even know Eric! Then people will believe you because in general people, esp. friends and family, can tell that you are obviously telling the truth


Really, the opinions of people outside your circle of friends and family really don't mean anything because if someone else told them that you are an angel, they would believe it since they don't know you well enough to know what you are like.

If you don't mind a little advice: focus your attention on your friends and family and feel how they love you, and if you feel lonely or if someone says something mean, just think: they don't know me; they don't know anything, and the people who count for me love me, so why should I lose any energy thinking about the opinions of people who don't know anything?

Maybe in the future you will end up in a happy, stable marriage with someone in that great group of friends or their brother or cousin.

Answer 8

Some may call it a depression, others might term it as a lonliness syndrome, yet some others may term it as your urge for socialising with new men each time.
there is no dirth of unqualified observations or Self opinionated conciet.
You have obsolutely no problem, or depression, or any mental illness, The feeling of lonliness is with everyone at some point of time in thier lives. so dont worry, Just do what you think is right.
besides I wiould suggest you take up reading as a habit, it might help,

Answer 9

There's nothing wrong with you you're just a LIL lonely. This town might not be big enough for you, get to the biggest city closest to you and meet some really hot guys but make sure he has his own car so he can come visit you when you're lonely.

Answer 10

no. there is something wrong with everyone else. everyone has to start some kind of rumor and some drama just to make their boring life interesting.
& the part about you feeling lonely, you are probably surrounded by a bunch of people but not talking to them. i do it all the time and i feel like no one likes me but its juat that sometimes you would rather be alone.