PLEASE HELP!! What should I do?

Question

My friend and I had an argument about politics and she said some really bad things about America. I finally got sick of it and told her that she should leave the country if she didn’t like it especially since she's here illegally. I tried to apologize to her about our argument later but she said I took a "low blow" by bringing up her illegal status-- especially since I knew her situation. I'm stuck between defending myself and whether or not to just let this friendship go. What should I say or do?

Answer 1

Wait! She said some bad things about America, your America...YOUR home, and YOU feel bad for bringing up her ILLEGAL STATUS??? She should go home if she isn't happy here. I here there are lots of open spaces in...say...Pakistan right now. Sorry, but you will get no sympathy from this Southern girl!

Answer 2

You DID take a low blow admit to her you were wrong in that (but in my honest and patriotic opinion, if she doesn't like it here why risk being here illegally??? She SHOULD leave), but let's get past the politics and get to the friendship, keep apologizing to her, eventually if she is a TRUE friend she will get over being mad and realize that you BOTH said some things in the heat of arguement that you probably didn't mean. IF she doesn't then she's not a friend worth having. Don't defend yourself, you believe what you believe, only apologize for offending her and hurting her feelings. Also in the future tell her you would like to avoid getting into discussions about things like that, and that you can both agree to disagree and leave it at that. I think if you are persistant in your want to patch things up she will come through, and you two will be friends again. And honestly I've lived in two different countries besides the USA, and well, I have to say your friend is on CRACK the USA ROCKS! But I just had to interject my personal opinion about it in there. If when you approach her you try to apologize and then turn around and try to defend your position again then what you're doing is just starting the fight up again, and it doesn't sound like that's what you want. Apologize for the things you did wrong (don't apologize for your beliefs or the things you honestly don't think you did wrong just to make her like you), and then tell her you all can disagree and still be friends, and that's what you want. It might take some time for her temper to cool and hurt feelings to heal so give her that time.

Answer 3

I'd let it go. She can't be on both sides of the fence. And it wasn't a low blow, so don't apologize.Obviously there's something special about the place for her to want to reside illegally. I would have said the same thing in your situation. Besides, she could get deported anytime, so may as well end it now! Help it along and call immigration, then she'll really have something to b*tch about, but you won't have to hear it! It's not as if you could even say: If you don't like it so much, vote and make a difference. The only reason she's complaining is because of the whole deal about illegal residents anyway. If she would have went about things the legal way, she wouldn't be the one everyone wants out of the country.

Answer 4

Tough situation. One thing, though. If she is so against America, why is your friend here? You might have hit a touchy subject with her, and feel the need to apologize, but I think an apology should come from her, too. Since she's here illegally, her family must have been desperate to leave a bad situation. And although it's not perfect here, at least we have things like freedom, civil rights, great universities, etc. She should realize how much better she'll have it here in the long run. But she & her family should become a legal citizen if they want to stay.

Answer 5

I can see why your friend would be upset because being an illegal immigrant has got to be a big deal for her, and maybe very stressful. But otherwise you are right, if she doesn't like it she should do something about it, like leave. But to keep your friend, you may want to just tell her that you feel differently than she does, and apologize again for the illegal remark. Hope it works!

Answer 6

I don't think it was a low blow. If they came here on their own then they shouldn't be saying things that are bad about this country, but if their parents brought them here then i guess it wasn't really their choice and they can say things like that. A good friend would understand the situation and apologize for saying negative things about your own country and if they don't then maybe you should forget the friendship.

Answer 7

Anybody that is in our country illegally & has the gall to trash us needs to go back home where their veiws on America are the same, most likely a country we suport. I sure would not want to be their friend. Oh, and by the way this is what we all believe deep in our hearts we are just too polite to voice it. Come here: speak english, take care of yourselves and stop getting money from this place you dislike so much. I don't really care what you think, stop whining and go home!!!!

Answer 8

Well, if your friend wanted to be here so bad that she came here illegally then she should admit that there are things here she can't get from her home country. I don't think it was a low blow at all, it was the truth. Your friend needs to take a good hard look at what she wants and why she came here in the first place. You need to take a good hard look at how self-involved your friend is.

Answer 9

If you really are friends, then the illegal status comment actually was a low blow, because there is nothing positive you can do about it (which makes it none of your business).

If homegirl won't accept your apology, it's "game over" for your friendship. Sorry.

Answer 10

Its good that you are patriot towards your country that's why you feel bad if someone says anything wrong about it but on the other side you should try to know why your friend is saying such thing and try to resolve the problem instead of losing your temper. Now finally you should take initiative and try to know what is the problem and solve it. This will be a great dedication towards your country and your friend. Try if it might work.