I'v been married for two years and 3 months and we have two girls. Well on Friday we had the biggest fight in the world were he hit me on the arm. Am I right for leaving with my two girls or am I wrong and should we work thing out???? I'm so lost!!!
2006-07-18 12:58:13 · 16 answers · asked by kandyrain 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ok let me say one thing....this was not just a hit like a tap this is like a fist in the arm...bruse hit!!!
2006-07-18 13:03:54 · update #1
Abuse is abuse, and it only escalates it does not cure itself and you can not "work it out".
2006-07-18 16:20:35 · answer #1 · answered by whostolemyprofile 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was so wrong for hitting you. I've been married 18 years and we fight often. My husband sort of shoved me onto the couch once and I almost left him for that.
I was in an abusive relationship(before I married)for six years. It was very destructive. It is also very, very habitual. If your husband does not pay any consequence for hitting you, he will think that he can do it again.
If this is the first time in two years that he has hit you, it is possible that he just went nuts and it will not ever happen again. Maybe he comes from a large family where hitting each other as a child was a common way to react to anger?
I think that you are right to move out. At least stay with family for a while until you figure out what to do next. My first instinct since there are children involved would be to insist that he go see a counselor. Better yet, y'all go together. It is quite possible that this will never happen again. Making him go to counseling might be enough to make him stop and think next time he gets mad.
I hope you get it worked out. I'll keep you in my thoughts.
2006-07-18 20:15:55 · answer #2 · answered by JustLookinAround 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gone! You were right to take the kids and leave. He has serious, and I mean serious problems with anger. That sort of behavior is completely intolerable, and criminal in most states. Go to Family Court and seek an order of protection against him if he harasses you. The only way you two should meet is at a counselor's office, police station, or lawyer's office. Get custody of your children in Family Court right away to prevent him from showing up and taking the kids. No man has the right o put his hand on you. Your kids are likely to be damaged emotionally from his violent, mean, and potentially criminal behavior. By the way, you still have time to report this incident to the police. They have officers their who are trained in issues of domestic violence who can guide you through the steps to get an order of protection and give you details on Family Court. Good Luck.
2006-07-18 20:25:07 · answer #3 · answered by Mr. Grudge 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Work it out girl. Him hitting you on the arm is just not worth leaving your family and ruining the lives of your two kids.
2006-07-18 20:00:58 · answer #4 · answered by A 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think that you should work things out begin that it was your first fight relationships are made to hard and filled with problems but it depends on the love that you have for each other and if your love is strong enough to work things out. email me at Litlledirtyred22@yahoo.com if you want to talk more on this subject because I have went throught the same thing and I think I could give you some helpful advice.
2006-07-18 20:05:04 · answer #5 · answered by Meka 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not looking in the right place for the correct answer. You need to seek professional help, no body here has been educated in this area we all are giving advise with personal experience. My personal opinion is that if he hit you once he will do it again but you really need professional help.
2006-07-18 20:04:06 · answer #6 · answered by 4X4 Woman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you were absolutely right to leave! Any kind of hitting, pushing, shoving, slapping,ect. and get out pronto! You don't need to be in that situation,and neither do your children. This doesn't mean that your marriage can't be worked out. If he agrees to help(counsoling), then hopefully your marriage can be saved. If he doesn't want to change, leave him. You'll be better off without him in that case. I will pray for you and your kids.
2006-07-18 20:45:25 · answer #7 · answered by save_me_now 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kandy, trust me with past experiences, you should leave with you two daughters, if you dont do something he will start to think that he has the power to control you and that is not right, so just tell him without words, that he is wrong, and if you stay he might just do that to you daughters, get out QUICK!
2006-07-18 20:03:18 · answer #8 · answered by Boy, You're My Lucky Star<3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get outside help like marriage counseling because if you go without help i don't know him personally but if your hitting because your angry you need help with your anger on top of everything you don't want your two girls to be brought up to think a man is suppose to hit kids copy adults
2006-07-18 20:08:59 · answer #9 · answered by Kay D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were right to leave. Maybe it was "just a hit on the arm" but one day it might be "just a punch in the eye."
Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever let a man lay his hands on you like that. It is totally unacceptable.
2006-07-18 20:03:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say leave, if he hit you once he will hit you again and it will only get worse. What if next time its your daughters? Trust me I know this from experiance
2006-07-18 20:04:20 · answer #11 · answered by nynerprincess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋