okay, so I'm emo....?

Question

I'm really in love with my emo music and my style. My parents aren't too happy with it, and they think I'm Gothic, they even have my grandparents trying to convert me over to the old me, when I wore colored clothing and listened to regular, non screaming,no make-up wearing men screaming their heart out kinda rock... omg I can't believe I liked hat kind of music!!! My parents over-heard some of my music and found my music lyrics. They told me that it was too depressing and that they missed the old me, I haven';t changed all that much, just the music,make-up and i paint my nails black and red,.... Is there anyway to keep my style, without my parents thinking I follow a religion, I don't believe in anything other than God,etc.( I'm not pagen or wiccan ) I always tell them that "black is a color, not a religion!"

Help, please!

Gothic is partially religion.... not just by wearing black..., I'm not Gothic, it's Emo - emotional...

They only want me to stop because I'm starting high school and they don't want me to get beat up by rednecks or fully 100% Gothic ppl...

i don't exactly catagorize myself, i just like what i see and go by the name of it...

Answer 1

Ya know, all kids go through phases! It's not like you're going to be dressing like that when you're 30!
I've listened to my daughter's emo music, and ya know what, I actually like some of it! The lyrics can be quite good if you take the time to actually listen to them (but you already know that!). Sit your parents down and ask them to listen to some songs that you really like.
Explain to them WHY you enjoy dressing the way you do. That it's simply an outward expression of yourself. Ask them how THEY dressed when they were your age, or in college. I'll bet you'd be surprised (unless they were missionaries!).
Talk to them..... keep the communication open with them. I'm sure they just want to know what's going on in your head and why you've chosen this "style". Good Luck!

Answer 2

Ah, I'm the same way. I used to be really mainstream dress, but I have always listened to metal, punk and classic rock, sometimes grunge, and rockabilly. But, I started dressing darker just because I love the way it looks, and much more because I'm a very morbid person, I love the occult, but I don't dwell in it. I'm more, well, I'm really not going to go into details, but let me just place a word in my description, Sadomasochistic. Black and dark colors are just natural to me.

Now, onto you. Your parents are probably worried about the same things my parents worry about. People's perception, acceptance of tolerance of you, based on how you're dressed and how they look around you when you dress like such. Sounds stupid? It is. They always ask me if I'm Satanic, or Atheist and it gets on my nerves. But, every time I add something even more crazy to my frickin' arsenal of dangerous clothes involving nails and spikes, they shake their heads and say, "Why?" My answer is the same, because I like it, and it makes ME feel right, and it makes ME happy. Noone else, you. Your parents are most likely concerned about your well-being, and knowing that's what makes you happy should be a start.

More complicated, is the "depressing" music, and the dreary, "depressing" way of dressing. I have always said, although it is not completely true, that I am not depressed and I am not affected by the song lyrics, that it is only music, not orders. When they ask why you dress that way then, just say it's what you prefer. Try it, see what happens, worst case, just tell them to accept you for who you are. That's all I can say.

Well, good luck with the crappy world of stereotyping, labeling and discrimination. I've been there and back too many times even for a computer to keep up with.

Oh, and high school isn't so bad. People don't beat you up for looking different, only if they're scared of you. Like me, ugh, people think I'm going to kill them. But they never mess with me, because my high school is full of frickin' p*ssies. I really cannot wait for the first day of my senior year. I'm going to screw with so many people, heh.

Answer 3

Music is a phase. But not all music. Some music will make you think, "that is it" that's the music I love. Then again, you find another. Such as Reggae, some is good, some not. So, you move on to another. So, lift up your voice now. Sing you sinners, if you can't sing, dance. Wherever there's music. the devil kicks, so make your choice. I, myself would heed Carl N. and what he has to say. As a matter of fact, I'll stand beside him in this question. But, he wears pink. So listen to your Grandma and your Grandpa. They love the old "you" and they would not want you to be any other way. They know the way that you're going is a devilish way and so do I.

Answer 4

If you have categorize yourself... there is a problem. That said, I have a word of advise... I'm 28, and I'm tatted up... started at 16. I have my MBA now, from a killer school, and I have a great job... but it's in corporate America and tats aren't really dress code. So, it's 100+ degrees today and I'm wearing long sleeves. Do I regret it? Not really but the choices you make last. My lip and tongue piercings are long gone, but some things stay with you. You do not want to be Emo or Punk at 30. That would be sad. And it's your parents job to worry. If they didn't, then you would really have a problem.

Answer 5

Your parents are, as most parents are, ignorant about the trends and styles that are popular at the moment, and are even shocked by your sudden change in fashion tastes. It hapens to almost all of us. My dad in particular was really critical of the music I listened to when I was your age.

The emo fashion scene is harmless, and that's what your parents don't understand. They may have heard negative things about Emos, such as the similarity to the sometimes feared Goth culture, and widely reported instances of self-harming among this specific group of people, but as long as you're not involved in that, don't try and change to suit any one.Try to explain that you are not depressed, and you like listening to the sort of music you do, because you identify with it. Be honest and open about the 'emo' scene, and it may help them understand. Perhaps invite some of your friends around, to show your parents that your friends are just regular teenagers, like yourself.

Like I said before, if you like who you are, be proud of that fact, and don't make allowances for anyone, even your parents, unless there's an occasion you are expected to dress up.

Answer 6

It sounds like you really like the new you. And even though I don't relate or understand the reasoning behind your preferences, that doesn't mean I don't respect them.
But as hard as it sometimes is, try to appease your parents. Let them know that you are still you, but just with some changes. Be open, not strictly emo. Try to get a balance. Maybe your drastic change is concerning your parents. Try to be open to other modes of self-expression, not just one way of doing things, (that's probably why they think your following some religion). Think of other things you like. Like I said, be open. Variety is always good, it adds to your character. Try to accept other things that might not be emo, besides you should be YOU not a label. You should never label yourself. One day you might change your mind about your preferences. So just try to discover YOU.

Answer 7

As a parent of 4 teenagers I know it is hard for your parents because they are frightened that you ae growing up and changing but also I remember what it was like to be your age and I wore black alot too it kind of fitted my mood. I am 30 now and still wear black but have lost the thick eyeliner now

Answer 8

Emos placed on all black and performance lengthy hair thats in there face and is just one color. they in many circumstances pretend to be depressed and stuff. Scene youthful toddlers gown "emo" yet with brighter hues, better peircings and do not pretend to be depressed. they're commonly quite into smoking and perscription drugs. Then there are "hardcore" scene youthful toddlers who pay interest to deathcore and act quite demanding even in spite of the indisputable fact that they placed on female's pants...

Answer 9

well my parents are the same way, actually you sound alot like me ,but my parents need to deal with the fact that i havent changed thatt much its just that ive gotten older and i dont want to be the little girl that they loved (not that i ever was) but i wear alot of black and listen to the same music butthey say im gonna get jumped by the people that are "satanic" which to her is goth but i dont put myself in a group ,but if i did i would either be punk, emo, goth, or outcast. it makes it easier to make friends in high school. dont worry about ur parents they can get over it!

Answer 10

I don't mean to sound condescending here... but it's a phase. You will grow out of it. Your parents really ought to know better -- all kids want to find a way to express themselves and their individuality. And your parents will probably hate your style until it changes... but what they don't seem to realize, is that this is part of the appeal! Sorry they are giving you a hard time, but most of us go through something similar during our teenage years.