ok last night my bf told me that when ever we talk i always say i dont know ,its up to you,and nothing.
i need to stop saying those things all the time.and he asked me what are you going to do when im gone in the military?
i said live me life go to school get a job and wait for you to come back.what do i do ?
he said you know how ppl grow apart from eachother they just get board well thats what is kinda going on.
dose it sound like he wants to stay with me or leave?
2006-07-18 10:53:54 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I don't think he wants to leave you. I think it is because he is leaving for the military and is worried about that. It is a big decision to join the military today with the way the world is. Maybe you can help him feel more comfortable about leaving if you start giving your opinion on issues now and not wait until he has left for the military.
2006-07-18 11:03:27 · answer #1 · answered by middle aged and love it 3 · 16⤊ 6⤋
It sounds like he's being realistic and knows the chances of your relationship surviving isn't very high...and it's true...long distance situations don't have a good track record, and especially for younger people who tend to have less patience in that area than those who've been in long term relationships over the years...
When he comes back if you are both still single and want to reconnect, that's awesome...but if he's going to be gone more than 6 months or so, then I'd say break up, keep in touch, and let Life take you where it takes you...
2006-07-18 17:58:13 · answer #2 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should really get off that 'i-don't-know-train'! If you need more time to think about something just say so. For all else learn to trust your feelings they say something too, but we generally only listen to the very powerful feelings. Point is to get in touch with yourself, which is the best way to find your answers in any given situation. From there on out it is also easier to make the best of a situation. So whether he wants to leave you is somehow up to you, he did put the ball in your court so whatcha gonna do with it?
2006-07-18 18:04:26 · answer #3 · answered by groovusy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds more like you're desperate to keep him no matter what. If you're always asking him to make decisions my concern is that you fear making a decision he won't like and that eventually he won't like you because you don't do things the way he wants them done. Of course, this behavior seems to ultimately be putting a strain on your relationship in and of itself. It sounds like he wants to hear that you have goals and that you don't rely on him (or anyone) to live your life; the life you want for yourself. Of course, it sounds like you don't really know what you want, so maybe you should take some time to figure that out. As for whether he wants to leave you or not, it sounds as though he is frustrated with the relationship. He may not want to leave you but rather see that you are strong enough to take care of yourself while he is gone.
2006-07-18 17:59:29 · answer #4 · answered by Redshift Agenda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he was getting frustrated with your non-committal answers and maybe is trying to tell you that you two are growing apart and should see other people. which, I think is a very good idea. You never know what you might miss out on while he is away if you are just staying home waiting for him.
good luck, hon.
2006-07-18 17:58:01 · answer #5 · answered by cyndi71mom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know it could be a combination of things. I think he is scared to leave you. You should talk to him. I don't know what branch he is gonna serve in but I know from experience it is hard to leave someone you care about, and go far away and not be able to talk to them as you would have before.
The military is tough on anyone, try to be there for him and I think your relationship will be okay.
2006-07-18 18:00:03 · answer #6 · answered by mudder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, based on your use the the English language, I think that you should go back to school for a while longer and then...maybe, by that time, you'll be over him and you'll have a better life...just let him go, there are lots of other fish in the sea.
2006-07-18 17:59:48 · answer #7 · answered by jonny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he wants to you be more involved in the choices you make together. When guys as you a question it is generally just to see what your thoughts are, if you like or dislike it. If you say I don't know, nothing....it seems like you're not interested in what's going on....so if you like him, start taking an interest and speak up.
2006-07-18 17:59:28 · answer #8 · answered by thoughtsofastranger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him.. sit and talk together and ask him what he wants.. does he feel you're growing apart? would he want to end it? .. hopefully that's not true but you never know.. if that's it then just try to move with your life.. but if you feel like he wants to be with you.. then find a way to stay in touch and try to see if you could do something special .. see if you can remind each other how you feel about one another.. hope that helps.. good luck to you
2006-07-18 18:06:21 · answer #9 · answered by Ninja CK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he thinks you are too dependent on him which will cause you to lose him down the road. I recommend telling him to come straight with you and take more interest in your own life, not his.
2006-07-18 18:00:03 · answer #10 · answered by cass 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun, gather up some guts and ask him. I have the feeling he doesn't want to stay.
Then again, why do you answer that? If you really want to be with a person, you say it, so the person can aknowledge it.
2006-07-18 17:58:40 · answer #11 · answered by AMBER D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋