My ex of 3 years ago, just recently got a job across the parking lot, in our small community. He has been living away since we broke up... and still commutes... I had recently asked him to go for lunch... to catch up.( We have been talking on MSN frequently, but there is absolutly no way that we would even think about doing anything, especially on my end, and he is getting married next year) Anyways, he said that it wouldn't go over well with the current g/f, then i suggested a trust issue, he said that its fine, then he kept asking why we should go out for lunch, I myself would just like to catch up with him, ( I have a b/f going on 18 months), and he said that it would be akward, and wouldn't explain why it would be... I don't see what the problem is... Does he think something will happen, Does he think that I am still into him eventhough I explain to him that I'm not, or is there something else playing here...? Help, guys especially....
2006-07-18 09:28:47 · 17 answers · asked by Kristin M 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
His girlfriend is one of the super controlling nags we see on here all the time who would kill their man for talking to his ex. Some women don't believe that men can only be friends with Ex's. Basically he is pussy whipped. Let him figure it out on his own. Why do you care so much anyways??? Maybe you still like him?
2006-07-18 09:32:42 · answer #1 · answered by Mike Hunt 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think that he might really think it to be akward. I mean if you two did have a serious relationship then going to lunch might stir up missed memories and feelings even if you do not think that they would. I suggest just to leave things how they are if he does not want to go out to lunch with you that is his choice and you must respect his decisions otherwise he might get the wrong idea. As for his new girlfriend dont you think that you would be a little jealous if you new b/f ex all of a sudden wants to have lunch with him...
2006-07-18 09:33:28 · answer #2 · answered by Lucid_dreams 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guys have a long history and men usually still fantasize about their ex girlfriends. I usually see no point in continueing any friendship after a relationship because you might still subconciously be holding on to something in the past and that can hinder your growth with your new boyfriend. Nothing possibly good can happen from you guys getting together for lunch.
2006-07-18 09:35:24 · answer #3 · answered by iamwetoddid365 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust is a issue with every couple some more than others, he is probably just trying to avoid a possible argument that may occur by having lunch with you and then again he might not think of you as close of a friend as you do of him. Hey, if he doesn't want to go then," oh well ". Good luck.
2006-07-18 09:35:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Learning how to let go of all committments to your ex is important here. You must do that and also learn how to trust yourself all over again.
It is obvious he doesn't want anything to do with you anymore, and has moved on.
Nothing wrong with that, it is only human nature.
Don't be hard on yourself, try to see the light and then next time someone who enters your life, give them a fair and equal chance at getting to know you and your heart again. You never know when the next person will enter your life, and it could be the right person for you forever!
2006-07-18 09:33:29 · answer #5 · answered by snorkelman_37 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now come on!!! Really take a good look at this situation. Would you like your boyfriend doing the same thing you're doing right now? Respect the fact that he doesn't want too. At least he's smart enough to know his boundries. Do you plan on going to the wedding or are you invited? You know guys have a harder time fighting temptation.
2006-07-18 09:36:08 · answer #6 · answered by twilight1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is absolutly no reason why u need to see him. just give it up. hes getting married and you have a bf. hes deff not interested in "catching up". guys dont do that stuff. thats something u would do with your old college girls. not an ex. you 2 arnt gonna be friends afterward so theres no reason to know whats goin on in his life right now. and hes certainly not gonna fu*k up his marrage for an ex gf.
2006-07-18 09:35:04 · answer #7 · answered by rodie5582 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how he feels. My ex and I broke up four years ago and I was a bit hesitant to see him again in person though we've talked on and off since we broke up. I felt awkward because he's my ex and it's so odd to just hang out with him after we dated.
2006-07-18 09:32:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
either he don't trust u or his self or if u were seen together it could get around and upset your boyfriend or his girlfriend , he's keeping his nose clean , i think he's doing the right thing , i wouldn't want my hubby meeting with another woman espesialy when he don't have the time or money to take me out , i would be pissed and hurt , would u want your man taking out an old girlfriend , and yes that would break my trust with my man , that's a big no-no
2006-07-18 09:37:21 · answer #9 · answered by cc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well with the info that u have given. i think he still has feelings for u, but doesnt want to tell u. but dont worry all guys are the same. when u brake up with them and u want to become friend they always feel weird and blame it on us if they start to feel love again. just keep on explaining to him what u really want.
2006-07-18 09:32:49 · answer #10 · answered by sexy_happy_lover 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋