I'm looking to get people's opinions on using pro se in divorce proceedings in California, namely Alameda County. I have the basic gist of pro se but want to know of people's experiences. Is it worth it? I've been preped by a lawyer and have been assured that family law judges would favor my case due to the unique circumstances prevailing i.e. I've been the primary care taker of my two children for the last 6 years. But I don't know how the finances will pan out. We are trying to work out a settlement outside of court but keep getting into arguements. We want to use mediation. But would arbitration or pro se be better in lieu of our arguing? Any advice would help and serious ones at that, please.
2006-07-18 08:01:24 · 3 answers · asked by ntoriano 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Pro se and Pro per are both Latin and mean "for the self" or "for the person." Just means you don't have an attorney.
Lucky for you that you live in Alameda. You have one of the better family law courts in the state. (Not as good as Santa Clara, but not bad.) If your ex has a lawyer and wants to litigate, you're at a huge disadvantage w/o legal counsel. If you go the mediation or arbitration route, things you say could be used in litigation latter if it doesn't work--be careful. Make sure you're as prepared for mediation, and know what not to say, as you would be for a trial.
All that said, Alameda will offer support to a pro se litigant that other counties don't offer. They have advice offices that will help you understand what you're supposed to do at each step.
Being the primary caregiver in California has not been a deciding factor in custody cases for a long time. It's a factor to consider, and it's important, but it doesn't assure the outcome. California uses a "best interest of the child" standard. It sounds great but it means either party gets to argue that the children would be better of with them regardless of who has been the primary caregiver. The better argument, as opposed to the better parent, wins.
Bottom line, you can do this, and you have the advantage, but it's still not easy or predictable. If you can afford it, an attorney would be best.
2006-07-18 08:31:22 · answer #1 · answered by Pepper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pro Se simply means for your self. That you are representing yourself. Don't do it unless your just going for the final hearing to finalize everything. Why, because if something somes up that you can't handle 'cuz your not a lawyer than you will be asking for a continuance to go consult your lawyer, so you may a s well have your lawyer there. Pro Se saves you a few hundred in Laywers fees when everything is already agreed to and your just going to court to make it official.
2006-07-18 08:37:38 · answer #2 · answered by Carp 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a lawyer. From experience! I have been separated for over a year, and my divorce hearing will be contested until we make an agreement about kids, finances, bills. We went pro se , and it has been a disaster. It's worth the money!!! You definately need mediation. Good luck!
2006-07-18 08:07:50 · answer #3 · answered by Littlemissy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋