i want to be some one else. being myself gets me no friends. i am usually alone and need someone to talk to. everyone calls me a band geek and a nerd. so what should i act like? i am always nice and even do peoples homework! help me please!
2006-07-18 07:29:02 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
It is important to differentiate what sort of esteem you are looking for. Some people are respected and genuinely liked as friends but some people are liked for a superficial trait (such as clothes or looks) and are considered popular for this reason. You need to be more specific because it sounds like you wish to be popular and have meaningful friendships, which are two goals that can be hard to reach at once. For one thing, being popular can attract the wrong type of people who are not there for your benefit and are there to ride the coattails of popularity so it would be hard to find someone to be a confidant in that sort of environment. Another thing is that befriending someone might give you the companionship you crave but it might not be possible to gain popularity as there is a social caste system present in most high schools and your friends determine your social caste.
However, it sounds like you're too much of a doormat for people to like you in either way. You do other people's homeworks! It makes you look desperate and clingy, which are extremely unattractive to potential friends. Being nice is also a vague description because nice is a vague and passive word. It is really easy to be passive, bland and nice (sometimes people do like that) but it looks like it's not working out for you. Also, it's not nice to accede to everyone else's wishes and needs and subsume your needs and personality for the sake of popularity or being liked-- it's being a doormat, which is just asking to be stepped on.
Sorry to be so harsh but get a personality and grow some backbone. Someone will like you but you can't force things either. You're probably better off learning how to get other people to genuinely respect you and from there, it's just a step away from getting them to like you.
2006-07-18 07:42:30 · answer #1 · answered by Esh F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take your mind off yourself and like other people.
Don't try to make friends with popular people so that you can get noticed. Chat with the popular people, but don't try too hard to get them to like you. Make friends with those who don't have a lot of friends.
5 years from now the popular people are no longer going to be popular. They are going to be just another working person in the world. Some will do very well in life and some won't.
If I could go back to high school with the wisdom I have today, I would be much more outgoing and friendly with people.
And most of all. Make the first move. Be the first to greet somebody. Don't wait for others to greet you first. Doing this would change your life more than anything else.
If they don't greet you back so what.
People usually regret the things they didn't do, more than things they did do.
2006-07-18 07:41:17 · answer #2 · answered by Scotty H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do people's homework. That makes you look like you're trying to hard. You don't want to be thought of as a doormat. Be confident and outgoing. Being nice is always helpful. Try to get involved in things that interest you (volunteering at the humane society, band camp, etc) and you will meet friends with your same interests. And DON'T listen to those people that call you names - they suck.
2006-07-18 07:34:03 · answer #3 · answered by impossible 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be your self why would you want to change for someone else to like you.Find others with your same interest.P.S. stop doing others homework.It will work out this to shall pass and you will meet people.Your young you have your hole life ahead of you.
2006-07-18 07:36:54 · answer #4 · answered by Sonny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Focus on being more homely, spend more time with your family, and have lots of family fun. With games, pick-nick, etc. Believe in yourself, and trust your instincts.
Good luck.
2006-07-18 07:40:02 · answer #5 · answered by Francia A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop doing peoples homework and kissing ***, dont let people take advantage of you, stand up for who you are, be yourself and people will respect that, thats how you make real friends.
2006-07-18 07:34:31 · answer #6 · answered by stephaniech24 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2006-07-18 07:41:18 · answer #7 · answered by lik_u_til_u_!ANDREW K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋