wat do i do?

Question

me and my husband are really NOT gettin along fightin bout anything we can think of carpet,food,movies,relationships,colors,etc. wat can i do to fix this we dont want to get a divorce but we cant live like this wat do we do

Answer 1

It takes two people to fight. You can stop fighting back. It WILL be hard. But with prayer and spiritual guidance things will turn around. Choose your battles, everything is not worth the stress.

Answer 2

Spend time alone together away from the everyday hassles of life. Do something new together, plan a trip, anything but make changes like buy a new house. Most importantly, learn the basics of communication. Try and find a couples group led by a counselor. It's amazing what you can learn from others in the same situation, and there are a lot of couples who fight on a regular basis. If my ex and I had done the above we would still be together. You should do something before it's too late.

Answer 3

What brought the two of you together? Sometimes remembering the beginning the falling in love, helps focus on what the real issue is now. FIghting about all these little things tells me that there is something bigger going on. Stress over jobs or money, kids, family. There is a bigger issue that you are ignoring, go and see a marriage consuler to help work thorugh it. This way you know whether or not there is something worth saving here.

Answer 4

You're not fighting about carpet, food, movies or any of that. Those are just symptoms. Your issues with each other are somewhere else. You have frustrations, disappointments, etc. in your life that have reached the point you can't keep them inside. Since you don't resolve the real issue, you fight about things that aren't really important.
First sit down with yourself... see why you're frustrated or disappointed with your life. Understand why you feel the way you do. Try to understand why you focus that on your husband. Then try to see why he's frustrated and disappointed with his life. Try to see why he's focusing on you. Once you identify the real, underlying problem that's causing the behavior, you can deal with it. Until then, all you'll do is fight.
One clue to him... men get their self esteem from two areas. Only two. Career and sex. So... where is he most frustrated, and what can you do to help?

Answer 5

You either got in a very comfort zone with each other, or you two are too bored and get an excuse to fight. Try some therapy, also try to get a separate hobby each one, or one of you take a short trip with some friends ( no cheating though). Sometimes the separation can make you miss each other and spark up th relationship. As long as you both haven´t lost respect for each other.

Answer 6

I would advise to get profressional help. I am reading a book about marriage, and they say that each person brings unspoken rules into the marriage and they figure that their spouse will behave one certain way. Also they follow in the footsteps of the role models they have had. (parents). So get help, and remember, marriage takes work, but it's worth it!

Answer 7

when was the last time you took off together to get back to the basic of the relationship.
Let him take you out on a date. Get the respect back for each other. And remember why you feel for each other.

Answer 8

If your closest informational resource is not currently reliable (i.e. your mate) you might want to look elsewhere for feedback.

Friends, family, co-workers, counseling, whatever works... But the key to it's success is to remember that if you ask the question, you must take the answer as a compliment to your friendship, not an insult to your intelligence. You might not like what you hear and you must be prepared for that.

Remember, it is you who is looking for answers. Good luck!

Answer 9

Well you need to talk about it, and see what the real problem is then find a mutual ground to stand on. I would suggest a get away to a cabin on the lake or a retreat somewhere. This will make it all about you both and your happiness.

Answer 10

well, you either need a date together or a few days apart to miss each other and remember what its like without each other. try not to yell when you start to argue (yes its hard!) and try using i sentances "i feel like this carpet is fithly because i dont have a carpet cleaner, could we put one on layaway?"

good luck.