"Spare the rod, spoil the child", is is favorite verse from the bible. He doesn not believe in time out, or punishments. I just got married five months ago, and my husband is having a hard time relating to my son. My husband also came into the marriage with his five yr old son. I notice that my husband beats my four yr old son for things that HIS son has done and didn't get anything other than a warning about. My son tries to have conversations with my husband,and my husband acts disinterested, and aloof. Yesterday, my son went to hug his stepdad when he got home from work, and my husband acted as though he didn't see him, and as my son turned away I snapped. I asked him how could he not see my son trying to give him a hug? He just shugged his shoulders. All he says to him is to "stop being a "mothers boy". I feel as though I hate him when he whips my son for stupid stuff like wasting juice on the rug. My son gets the worst spankings out of all the FIVE kids, I hate it! Please help?
2006-07-18 06:13:00 · 10 answers · asked by candy0813 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
LEAVE HIM QUICK. HE IS DOING TO YOUR SON WHAT WAS DONE TO HIM AS A CHILD! DON'T LET HIM RUIN YOUR SON'S LIFE THE WAY THAT HIS FATHER RUINED HIS!!!
2006-07-18 10:07:17 · answer #1 · answered by Precious 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for your predicament. I also find my boyfriend is tougher with my son than I am but your husband has a real problem. You need to tell him that you are leaving unless he changes. If he doesn't change, then hard as it will be to walk away from this new marriage, LEAVE! Your son is more important. Also, report it to the police in order to get more support in this matter (if you leave). In order to support your allegations, you should start secretly keeping track of what happens, why and when. There is nothing in the world bad enough that a 4 year old boy should be whipped. If you stay & allow him to abuse your son like this, your son (if he survives) will grow up to hate him and you for not protecting him. Even if it's hard, even if it hurts, even if it's not easy - leave him if he doesn't stop. My heart bleeds for you and for your little boy. Where is his father to help protect his son?
2006-07-18 13:24:58 · answer #2 · answered by savagescorpio 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is not good for you or your son. i would suggest writing things down on paper that you want to say to your husband (so you dont forget) then ask him to get help, counceling and whatnot. if he refuses i would pack my kids and leave. it sounds like he has it out for your baby and when your son grows up he might resent you for staying with that man.
there are plenty of men out there that will not treat your son like this. just gotta keep looking!
good luck.
2006-07-18 13:18:48 · answer #3 · answered by ziggunerin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's actually called physical assault (even in your own family). Give him a shock one day and just step outside the house and call 911 on him if he has decided it's his way or no way... he'll be handcuffed, read his rights and hauled off to jail. I don't think he knows that this is actually against the law!
2006-07-18 13:18:10 · answer #4 · answered by Windsurfergirlinphx 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st off you have to look out for your child it should'nt be that way you just said out of your own mouth that he spares the rod for his own why not yours you should step up to the plate and be a mom put your foot down and tell him you disagree with his tactics i would never let no one abuse my kid like that i know youre in a difficult situation and my mom was too but just tell him to cut it out and treat all the kids the same but love is not worth it if your kids have to endure abuse like this i rather be lonely as long as my kids are happy and not being abused in order to love you he has to love your kids the same way he loves his and thats that
2006-07-18 13:23:38 · answer #5 · answered by TEXXBRATT 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how to solve your issue, nor can I speak for you. But in your shoes, I'd stand up to him and say, " treat ALL the kids the same....OR.... leave the mothering to me. IF that's too much to handle? Then one of us will stay in this house. I didnt marry you to step over my kids and justify". He would get the picture.
2006-07-18 13:46:05 · answer #6 · answered by cre8or 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband doesn't know how to love or to get it. He needs counseling, but may not try to get help. You should get counseling to see what direction you should go.
2006-07-18 13:22:21 · answer #7 · answered by mustanglady 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GET A DIVORCE. YOU HAVE TO PROTECT YOUR CHILD AND FORGET ABOUT EVERYTHING ELSE. BECAUSE YOUR SON IS GOING TO RESENT YOU WHEN HE GETS OLDER AND WONDER HOW COULD YOU LET SOMEONE TREAT HIM THAT WAY.
2006-07-18 13:22:38 · answer #8 · answered by shi shi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some reason, I dont think your husband EVER used that verse....just a guess......you need help dear.....be submissive and play your position.....God will take care of the rest.
Were you so naive that you didnt see this before.....or did you choose to ignore these signs just for your own gain........well its to late now YOU ARE MARRIED....FOREVER.....HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAH(gasp)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
2006-07-18 17:18:21 · answer #9 · answered by Massa Bruce 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its called child abuse you should leave him before he hurts your son mentally or phisically tell him he has no right to correct your child that you will correct him.
2006-07-18 13:21:12 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋