How do you stop a parent from smoking when you live with them and they have just had lung cancer?

Question

My mother will not stop smoking even though she almost died from lung cancer and went through hell after having two-thirds of her lung removed. She has recently started smoking again and I hate it. I stay ill all the time with allergies as does my son. Is the only thing I can do move out?

Answer 1

Unfortunately, you cannot control your mother. The best thing you can do is to take care of yourself and your son. I know it's hard to watch, but you have to realize that millions of people are addicted to nicotine and end up dying from it every year.

I do know that several years ago, when my husband wanted to quit smoking, the doctor put him on an anti-depressant called Welbutirin, I think. My husband said it really helped. The doctor explained that many people who have a very difficult time getting off of nicotine, they have a chemical imbalance in their brain and the nicotine seems to fill that void. The medication helps to take the place of the nicotine, thereby helping the user to quit. But your mom still would have to be motivated to quit. it would still take dedication on her part.

Answer 2

I hate to say this, but yes, that is all you can do. You can't tell your mom what to do even if what she is doing is killing her. If she were mentally ill or making these decisions because she was on drugs or something, you could probably go to court and get power of attorney and have her committed or something. As it stands, all you can do is move out and take care of your health, as well as your son's. And, we can both pray for your mom to stop before it's too late.

Answer 3

Mothers discipline a child when that child does wrong. Not because she hates the child. But she wants the best out of that child. :-) Sometimes, it works the other way around, if in a very affectionate yet stern way. NO MEANS NO MUM! You owe that poor lady your special care.

Answer 4

I guess you need to set a good example of not doing something you wanna do just because it suits you. For instance, your mother smokes even though she knows it's unhealthy, she does it anyway. This is similar to one of your previous questions regarding (you) sleeping with a married man and interferring in his relationship, just because you want to. Do you see the similarities? You need to consider the consequences of your actions. Try setting the example of determination by kicking your habit and they will see they can kick their habit too. You can do it. I have faith in you. Good Luck with your parents.