HELP friend prob?

Question

ok i have a boyfriend and a best friend and they are usually at my house at the same time know my friend gets mad at me when i am with him even if it is for a minute to say hi what can i do i want me and her to stay friends but i really love my boyfriend he understands me but shes the only person thats been there for me and i don't want to have to choose one or the other

i give them the same amount of attention but she wants more

Answer 1

It is common, especially when friends are close, to feel rejected and alone when a "boyfriend" enters the picture.

From my experience, the best way to handle it is to reassure your friend how important she is too, but let her know how it is tearing her up because you care for your boyfriend and really need her support, even if she doesn't think he is right for you, but to trust your judgment. Also, scheduled at least once a week where just you two girl, sans the boyfriend, get together and do something fun, can just be as simple as having dinner and a movie or a sleepover together, and during that time you agree not to mention the boyfriend...whether it is to praise him for complain about him...enjoy her and her friendship. If she is as close to you as it sounds, she might accept this. She doesn't have to like him...all you are asking is that she treat him and you with courtesy and respect.

If your boyfriend really does understand and trust you, he won't have any problems with this either. If he does, then you need to re-examine your relationship with him. Controlling boyfriends don't get better with time..usually just more abusive.

As no one likes to feel they are the odd person out, another thing to try is to ask you boyfriend if he had any cute friend that you friend might like come over with him and all four of you hang out for a night. If it works, great, if not, have him ask another friend the next time.

Good luck!

Answer 2

did you and your friend hang out together a lot before you got with your boyfriend? if so, she might not like the idea of sharing you with him. it's almost like he's invading on her time with you when she's around visiting you. also, does she have a boyfriend and if so, is it serious? i ask because if she did, she would understand you're situation a bit more and wouldn't put you in such an uncomfortable predicament. i had a best friend who did the same thing to me. she would get angry when i spent time with my boyfriend (even if she was there!). her relationships were never serious so she didn't understand that what she was doing to me was selfish on her part. she later found a boyfriend she became serious with, and suddenly she was missing in action all the time. always busy with her boyfriend or inviting me out with them. i didn't have a problem with that but when it was me, "she" did. try to spend one-on-one time with her. so she doesn't feel like you're slipping away. talk to her, tell her how you feel and if she gets offended, you need to evaluate the depth of this friendship. i'm sorry the answer is so long!! good luck with the situation and i hope she understands.

Answer 3

Your going to have too, because if shes your best friend then she will understand. You have to look at the big picture. It's what you really want for you. You run your life not her.

Answer 4

if she's your best firend,she'll understand,talk to her,tell her how you feel, but remember not to take her for granted,try to give her almost the same amount of time you give your boyfriend,so she doesn't feel left out and once in a while hang out with both of them.