Before my husband and I were married I made sure
he knew all about me, and the things I have done
that where the most controversial or dispicable.
In complete honestly, an engaged or soon to be
engaged couple should be forthright with such
things. It enables the other to freely decide
if they truly want to be married. I have heard
some say that there are some things that are
not the others business. I beg to differ.
Secrets can come out later in life and cause
disaster in the marriage. It also prevents
the person from forming an honest opinion of
you and conflicts with that persons freedom
of choice.
Witholding information to keep a relationship going
is not fair to the other person. I also feel it is a form of lying-especially where important/or controversial subjects
are concerned that person has a right to know
as your future spouse...
This would entail anything and everything that might offend
or cause the person to rethink the relationship.
What do you think?
2006-07-17 22:14:36 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It is my opinion that the person has
a right to know, particularly before
engagement has taken place.
Do you feel the potential Spouse
has a right to this information?
YES? NO? Explain your answer please
2006-07-17 22:16:16 · update #1
Are there exceptions to the rule?
YES ? NO? Explain your anwer
2006-07-17 22:18:50 · update #2
What can i say, NEVER and i mean NEVER keep secrets, they always get found out, upfront and honest, whether good, bad or ugly.
2006-07-17 22:38:45 · answer #1 · answered by Jewell 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't think you have to go pouring out every detail of your life to someone who has come along after the fact. You might generally discuss your previous relationships, but details should not be discussed. You might stir up more than you planned for. If there is something like an abortion, or a child involved, yes, I think disclosure is necessary. If it involves another marriage, yes. If it involves serving jail time, yes. If there is something like past drug use, yes. Any LARGE issue should be discussed. But for every little fling you have, big deal. If someone loves you, they love you for who you are and where you have been in life makes you who you are.
2006-07-18 06:02:37 · answer #2 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all have secrets! And there are some that should remain secret. And withholding information is sometimes a good thing.
However I think a couple needs to talk about as much as possible before they are married. After 2 years of marriage is not when you find out that one of you does not want kids!
2006-07-18 06:06:26 · answer #3 · answered by paintingj 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think secrets are stupid. When you love someone and want to be married to them for the rest of your life, they should have no fears of sharing every detail of their life. Only if you can not hold their past against them. Most don't want to share for fear of rejection or just don't want to relive some of their past. If it were due to anything medical yes in a heart beat I'd want to know all but if it's just trivial stuff, let it go :)
2006-07-18 05:24:57 · answer #4 · answered by Tainted_Halo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely it depends upon what kind of secrets. If it is touch and go, not necessory to communicate it. If that secrets keep buging you, and if it would ruin your relation in future then better share it. For example You are already having child. Because this would definitely come into picture.
if it is like, you had crush, small time affiar,these kind of things will not take much needed notice.
So it is purely depends what kind of secrets.
If that secrets are really bugging me, i will share it.
2006-07-18 06:54:42 · answer #5 · answered by rai 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the past should stay in the past unless it will pysically harm the other person
2006-07-18 07:40:39 · answer #6 · answered by JULIE 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋