How do I get along with my husband?

Question

My husband thinks I am not looking for a job. I'm looking daily and sending resumes and making my callbacks, etc. It's getting to the point where he is calling me names and acts like he does not respect me. We just got married last month, but have been together for three years and he has an 11 year old son. I don't know what to do. :(

We moved to SD from Omaha last Oct, and got married in June... I had a job at a daycare but lost it due to a layoff. I have not had any luck finding anything since. Before all of that, I was trying to start up a home daycare in our house but there are about 30+ daycares in our town/city alone! :( Now I am looking into customer service. I know he is feeling the pressure, but last night, we had a worse arguement and he was throwing things, etc. I don't have family here, my family is 4 hours away, I ended up calling my mom and talking to her so I could calm down. :( Don't know what to do.

Answer 1

How fast can you run? You should do it.

Answer 2

You not having a job and him calling you names are two seperate issues. Name calling is verbal abuse, it makes him feel all high and good and feels like he is putting you down. I would think if you all had a good relationship before a simple thing like it taking time to find a job wouldn't cause this much trouble. Is there something else going on? What does his 11 year old son have to do with it? If he doesn't respect you now, he probably never did. Some men show their ugliness after the vows are said. You need to really work on letting him know treating you like that and talking down to you will NOT BE TOLERATED.

Answer 3

I have been in your shoes. It's very degrading. I am 45 years old and I was raised that dad made sure that all our needs were met. Not so much our wants, but our needs. My dad took on 3 jobs just so mom could stay home and take care of the home and kids. My EX-husband was on me constantly about getting a job, and he said he wouldn't work two jobs for anybody. (That would include myself and our two children.) Real caring man wasn't he?..I started to babysit a few children in my home just to help out with the bills. Can you make ends meet without you going to work, or does your husband WANT alot of material things that are not necessary. Set a budget, clip coupons, live frugle and see how things work out. GOOD LUCK..

Answer 4

Tell him that it takes time and everyobody that looks for a job doesn't get it the next day. The number one cause of divorce is the lack of good communication and you both need to talk about this seriously. I assume that he must not make that much money to care for the three of you till you get a job. Also, ask him what do he expect from you?

Answer 5

He really sounds like he is the one with problems..maybe you need to make a copy of everything you do and give it to him, you can only do so much. He is probably worried, but he is putting too much stress on you. If he is calling you names he is not respecting you. Id let him know quick that you didnt marry him to head straight on into divorce. Do all that you can and let him to know he needs to backoff. Marriage is stressful and a full time job itself and he does need to understand that and you to make this work.

Answer 6

Calling you names? He's how old, exactly? Twelve? Sweetie, he's a loser. After you find a job, consider dumping his a** for someone who will treat you with respect and love, not degradaton and humiliation.

Answer 7

You are doomed to a lifetime of this abuse and more. Take the hint. Get out of the relationship.

Answer 8

Tell him you need him to be supportive of you and that his comments are hurtful to you. Hopefully that will change his tune.

Answer 9

How fast can you run? You should do it.

Answer 10

Run,