2006-07-17 10:20:49 · 42 answers · asked by chicaloca12712 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
if he loves you then he'll love your kids. If he doesn't want your kids then he doesn't really love you..... drop him.
2006-07-17 10:22:18 · answer #1 · answered by kitkool 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish you would provide more info. How old are your kids? How long have you been seeing this guy? What do you mean by not including? If you haven't been seeing this guy long maybe he just wants to wait before meeting your kids. It can be really hard on kids when someone is in and out of your life. My friend Jason has a child and is a single parent and waits until he feels that the girl he is seeing and him have a strong enough connection to meet his son. I think that is smart.
On the other hand if he never wants to see your kids or hang out and is leaving them out of appropriate activities than you need to ask yourself if having this man around is worth alienating your kids for. If your family is truly important to you, you will not allow a man in your life who will not love you or your children. When you meet someone be honest and upfront from the beginning about your children and what you expect in a man. If that man is unwilling or incapable you will avoid this situation in the future. You kids should come first, put their needs ahead of your own, that is what giving birth to a child means, you give up the right to be selfish.
2006-07-17 10:27:45 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hell no! i am saying this because i have been there done that he knew you had kids before he got in the relationship ask him if he knows that kids are a added bonus when it come to dating and relationships,also ask if it was a problem before why did he start something and connot follow through i once had a man do the same thing and like i told him if you become part of my life you have to accept all of it andnot just half because my kids come before you do... he walked away the next day ... no Man is worth half the love a child can give so if doesn't accept you as a package get rid of him you cant have one without the other.
STILL BITTER BUT HONEST
2006-07-17 10:28:28 · answer #3 · answered by sweetshariqua 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Because your kids will always be with you and around you, If he can include your kids and he stays then your kids will feel like you hate them. My parents split and my mom has been married 3 other times and the guys would either not let us go anywhere with them or they just wouldn't go out after he was already living with us. so your kids will feel like they did something wrong for you to have picked this guy to be around or.... you will feel guilty because you can't take them out with you and have fun all together.
2006-07-17 10:28:03 · answer #4 · answered by meika v 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, your kids are and should be part of your life 'till they move out at 18 or 20 or so. And to some extaent after that if and when they need you. Anyone you pick should at least accept that. Ideally get someone who wants to have the kids involved in life and who wants to make a good life for them too.
2006-07-17 10:25:05 · answer #5 · answered by kurticus1024 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO you are a package deal and if he cannot handle your kids then You should not be giving him the time of day.
What are you gonna do if he wants to marry but still doesn't want to include your kids.
It is one thing to have true dates that are just you and him but another for him to never include your kids in anything.
2006-07-17 10:23:46 · answer #6 · answered by bootsjeansnpearls 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How doesn't he include them?
Does he spend any time with them? Does he take any responsibility for them? If the answers no to both of these questions then I would tell him he has to include himself with your kids or you going to include his ticket home.
Peace
2006-07-17 10:24:29 · answer #7 · answered by MastaP 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your kids are number one . You are who they look up to -if you let some BoZo pretend they don't even exist-what's next ? The closet ?
Tell the guy to take a hike ; you may have kids , but that doesn't make you desperate .
2006-07-17 10:24:10 · answer #8 · answered by missmayzie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your kids should come first before any man. If he doesn't include your kids then he should go.
2006-07-17 10:24:37 · answer #9 · answered by Sher 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. I was a product of a step family. As a child, all I wanted was for her (dad's wife) to love me. Instead, she hated me, called me names, and never made me feel like a part of her family (my dad & their children). She only wanted my dad and not everything that came along with my dad. Don't bother with a man who can not make time for your children now. It won't last or your children will feel like outsiders. On the up side. My mother's husbands made me feel like I was his biological child. He helped my mother take care of us. He was there for everything that was important in my life. Just like is for my children. They call him Pop-Pop as well as my father. They feel loved by both of my dads. He treats us all fair. So there is hope to find a good man that will love you and your children. And you will know it. If you are having doubts, that should be answer enough! When you find that good man, you won't have that doubt.
2006-07-17 10:32:34 · answer #10 · answered by Shamrock 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No way. Your children are going to be with you forever. Never ever put a man before your kids. If he truly loves you he will love your babies also.
2006-07-17 10:24:23 · answer #11 · answered by delovely 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋