My fiance and I have been together for 3 years, but just recently decided to get engaged, we already have hit a lot of rough areas in our relationship...Including trust and honesty...This is where It lies...My fiance has told me that he loves me and only me. But he's Flirted, Got numbers, checked out, and all the crap a man would do if he's not happy with who he's with. I don't know if I can believe him, but I want to, I do love him and I want to believe him. But he has done a lot to hurt me, and I don't want to leave him, we started counseling. But for some reason I blame myself for everything that is going on. What can I do and how could I make him feel that I do love him and I want the same treatment?
2006-07-17 09:04:46 · 11 answers · asked by missbehave252002 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
ok im not the best person to give advice but have u asked him why he flirts or or gets numbers fr others i know alot times we dont ask because we are affraid of the answer but its best to know because down the line if he is staying with u just because of everything ya have been through or because hes affraid that you will find someone else alot of men cheat and lie because they feel insecure and its not because u dont show him its athing that starts out young but you love him and thats ok but we are women and we can feel if they are true if your affraid to ask him ask urself the truth lies within its called womens intuition youll know good luck and be well
2006-07-17 09:15:27 · answer #1 · answered by cmyl77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, don't break up if you don't want to, continue your counseling together, but do not get married. Wait until ALL these problems are resolved. Don't bring all this into a new marriage, it won't last. And don't blame yourself! It's not your fault he is flirting and getting phone numbers. If he doesn't treat you the way you want to be treated then he's not the right person for you. You can't make anyone do anything they don't want to do.
2006-07-17 09:14:23 · answer #2 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should move on. If he is asking women for their numbers, then he's looking for a replacement. If he isn't cheating now, he soon will be. And, once you have children together, it will that much harder to split up.
Why start a marriage when your relationship is troubled? You need strong friendship, love, and commitment to weather the storms of marriage and family.
Move on now and find someone who respects you.
2006-07-17 09:12:53 · answer #3 · answered by Otis F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do is keep asking him questions. See if hes persistent in answering the same question with the same answer. Wait a couple of days later and then ask the same question and see if you get the same answer.
2006-07-17 10:09:01 · answer #4 · answered by smokey 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl he hurted you a lot, give youre self a chance, why dont you try to have someone whos going to give you the love and honesty that you wanted. just look a liitle bit farther then youll see.
2006-07-17 09:20:22 · answer #5 · answered by lolipop 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to break the news to you but a guy who wants to marry a woman and states that he loves her would not do the above.
2006-07-17 09:08:49 · answer #6 · answered by lily 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't know if he's being honest. You aren't him. Stick with the marriage councilor and make sure you're both doing it for the same reasons.
2006-07-17 09:10:26 · answer #7 · answered by Kitten 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a man in love doesent get other people phone numbers... and therapy..LOL!!!! well from what he sounds like hes a player.. dont blame yourself for finding an as$hole that you obviously cant trust..dont marry him ,it will be Hell!
2006-07-17 09:19:41 · answer #8 · answered by Ms Scarlet 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't sound capable of being faithful to you. I would not continue with the relationship as I would struggle to trust him. Please think about this - you don't want to marry him and always be worried about what he's doing.
2006-07-17 09:20:23 · answer #9 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be the best companion you can be. If he continues to do what he does, then let him go. It is not your fault. He is gonna be who he is, and you can't change him. He has to want to change. If he doesn't, then you can do better.
2006-07-17 09:47:07 · answer #10 · answered by L Jeezy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋