Women: Why do you work a full time job, and still do all of the house work?

Question

It puzzles me why women are the ones who work a full time job, plus bear the brunt of the household chores and child rearing and preparing meals? I mean, I understand if the lady is a stay at home mom/housewife, but a woman who works 40 hours a week+? Why arn't the childrearing and the household chores shared equally? If man wants a woman to go out and work as much as him, why does the woman have to still do all of the work at home? Does anyone do this, and if you do, why?

Answer 1

I think any woman who would let her husband do anything less then 50 percent in taking care of the house hold work and childreading is an idiot. This mentality came out of a time when women did not work outside of the home. I know, if my husband where to expect me to work a full time job and take care of the house and the kids, I would be in divorce court. A respectful man and a good husband would not expect this of his wife. These women that say " I can't get my husband off the couch" are ridiculous, if your husband had respect for you, he would be doing his share.

Answer 2

Time for self?? A long shower with the bathroom door locked is about as much as I get these days!! (provided I was left any hot water!!) My workout is running errands, to and from games and practices, cleaning the house at warp speed and laundry! I try to get on my treadmill 3 times per week, usually in the morning while my toddler lies in bed and we watch cartoons. Hectic yes, sacrifice yes, would I change a thing, probably not. I work full time and my husband works on the road so it is pretty much me and the kids all week long (3 boys, 13, 11 and almost 2) You learn to love dust bunnies and accept a wet swiffer across the kitchen floor as a good scrubbing some weeks. You learn that laundry baskets often become second dressers, wet wipes can be used as a substitute bath in a time pinch, you dont get fined for unmade beds and that watching the Disney channel is far less depressing than watching the news! Hugs, kisses, snuggles, finger paint pictures, sports trophies, and drying away tears are some of your rewards now. I am sure it sounds so overwhelming but it happens. It has to. It all eventually gets done. You just do it. You prioritize, baseball game or laundry - guess what the laundry will still be there when you get home - that 1st home run you cant go back and see if you miss it. You can do it. Lots of us do!

Answer 3

Too be honest it used to puzzle me also, but then I was adding to the problem. I was a stay at home mom for quite some time and then I had to go to work full time. I, at first was coming home from a 40 plus hour week and doing all of the household chores. it got old real quick. So I made a deal with my boyfriend (we had been living with each other for many many years at this point) and I told him that he is to do ALL outside chores: trash, painting, weeding, boat, cars, sprinklers, jacuzzi and making all of the calls for this as well. And that I would do all of the inside stuff like cleaning, laundry, children and the like. I was blessed on one aspect tho: I never cooked he was the cook and loved doing it. He paid all of the rent and I paid all of the bills, it came out pretty equal. I would suggest that if you and or anyone you know has this problem, then I would express to them that it doesnt have to be like that and that if the significant other loves you then they need to help out with household duties as well. We arent living in the 20/30/40/50's where the woman is to do all of the household activities even if she works.

Answer 4

The whole family should pitch in and help with the housework if not its impossible for one person to do it. You're human too and you get tired just like anybody else. You are right to question and you should ask your husband for help and be firm about it. If he doesn't do anything about it then just do the best you can, the laundry is still dirty? Sorry been busy working and with the kids. The dishes aren't done? Haven't had time. I've been in your shoes eventually my husband hired someone to help me clean once a week because he never saw me I was always working or cleaning. Good luck.

Answer 5

I don't do it. I work 60 hrs a week. My husband also does work about as much. I communicate with my husband about chores. I will live in a mess sometimes.

We made an agreement early on to:
-grocery and Target shop TOGETHER
-cook and prepare as many meals as possible
-clean together OR hire a cleaning service if we are too busy (I'm too cheap to hire out, so we just do it together)
-do our own laundry (he's shrunk WAY too much of my stuff) and do the joint laundry (towels, sheets, etc) together.

Any woman in this situation needs to tell her husband/boyfriend how stressed out this makes her and how this leads in to being too tired for an adequate love life. If said husband pitches in more, then a happier man he will be in the bedroom.

This approach has made our life easier. Although we have other issues, this is one area I am stress-free!

Answer 6

I do it because if i don't it won't get done. I work from 7:00 in the morning to 6:00 in the evening and i work with kids on top of that. so when i come home im not really leaving work, i have 2 kids of my own so its like bringing work home. and yes i do all that stuff, plus more. And ive tried to talk to my husband and get him to help around the house but usually i am very unsucessful. oh well, i guess im gonna put up with it as long as i can.

Answer 7

I've worked fulltime 8 to 5 for the last 3 years since I had my fourth child. My husband helps out a lot. He likes to cook. I still do 90% of everything but it has worked out OK.

Answer 8

I work full time, as does my husband and we make it work by sharing everything 100/100, as in we both give 100% of ourselves. I love it this way. We work exactly the same hours and carpool, so we are both home equal amounts of time. We do housework together, we cook together, we take care of our children together, it is beautiful in a sickening kind of way, lol.

I know some women who try and handle everything home related all by themselves while working full time, and its just such a beat down. Its so much stress. Why not ask your partner to contribute? You shouldnt be afraid to let him know you need help and cant do this alone.

Answer 9

When I worked..everything was shared. I do most of it now because I am home but dont get me wrong..I'm not a maid..I demand that other members of the household clean up after themselves. As far as childrearing, thats a job for both parents no matter who is working.

I also hate to cook and my husband likes to cook.

Answer 10

you know something, i ask myself that question everyday i work full time nights and have 3 great kids i work hard inside and outside of the house i cook clean take care of the babies he works days and comes home to aclean house and kids with their heads still in tact but to answer your question i do all this because i know if i dont do it it wont get done[i married amommas boy]lol