how come i cant orgasam?

Question

I ahve been married 6 years and latley i havent been able to orgasam I dont know if its due to the problems i have been having with my husband.Latley he has been very controlling.and picking arguments.I really dont even want to have sex but i feel its my duty because he provides for me and the kids while i stay at home with the kids.Plus if i dont give it to him he gets very angry and trys to take it anyways..I dont know if there is a physical reason that i cant.I did have a baby 5 months ago and i am on birth controll pills.Or is this just a mental thing.Please help any suggestions are well appreciated

Answer 1

You know I believe a man is supposed to support his family 100%! I was a stay at home mom of a ten month old baby girl. I just returned to working again about 2 weeks ago! You know, I can't begin to tell you "NEVER should you feel as though you have to have sex". Secondly, I am speaking from experience your husband picks arguments because he's envious of you staying home while he works! As a result of having stay home with a busy infant, cleaning the house, hearing him complain (about other things because he's really annoyed at the fact he's doing all the supporting and don't want to just say it), neglecting myself (not getting my hair done, new clothes, nails done, ect.) and feeling like I had to humble myself it caused a major impact on my sex drive all of those reasons above made me not even want him, plus a child is stressful, and birth control girl those three will make you unhappy and that my dear is why you aren't having an orgasm, okay! My advice would be to do what makes you feel good let him know you need the romance and a job at as a stay at home mom is not to be taken lightly put him in his place!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 2

Well, for a woman , or at least for me, its very very hard to orgasm, i really have to concentrate, i cant even have the tv on.

You had a baby 5 months ago, your hormones are astatic, if you are thinking about the whole situation while your having sex, i doubt you can orgasm either, also when i started the pill i was paranoid that it would ruin my sex drive, so when i had sex for the first time after starting the pill i couldnt, but that was all in my head.

If you forget about all the problems, stop being paranoid, maybe you can orgasm.

Answer 3

No wonder, you are under a great deal of stress, 3 kids, forced to have sex.
You are tired, lacking of sleep, stress and feel obligated to fork out, doing the same thing day in day out.
OK you are stay at home mom, but your work is 24 hours a day, his day finishes when the whistle blows.
I also been forced to put out at 2am, it’s on her terms when I want it, she comes with an excess, even when we are alone.
I try to seduce her, but she says it tickles, and turns her off, or it makes her wet, and she does not like the feeling. Did I mention she wants in the dark.
I explained guys are visual, we enjoy the pleasure of seeing a woman’s body, her excess is “what!, you can’t remember!”. BIG TURN OFF.
Sorry for out burst. Back to you.
You need a girls night out, taken to dinner, does he bring flowers or a little something, as a surprise.
Does he try to get your parents or mothering law to look after the kids to have some loving time together.
You cannot get aroused at a snap of the fingers, does he try to seduce you and have loving playful foreplay.

As for him picking arguments, there must be something he is not telling you, he’s using this to hide something, problems at work is a big factor, has he, or going to celebrated a big number birthday like 30, 40 or 50, then reflecting back what have I done all these years ( to me age is not a factor, it’s how you feel inside) my ex-brother in law really flipped out when he hit 40, ( grade 10 grad, drives a truck, 0 skills, he messed up his life and he thinks it’s too late to change) .
Do you fall asleep early in the evening, us guys take it as we are not important enough for your attention. Hey you got a baby to deal with.

E-mail me if you wish, just to talk sort off speak

Answer 4

He obviously doesn't care if you get your cookies or not.........as long as he gets his! Take matters into your own hands at least their he cant control you. You do not have to go outside of your marriage sounds like you have enough problems already . If all you really want is to get off than do yourself and have a great time fantasizing about who you would like to get it on with instead of you hubby who is a total control freak from your description . Good Luck

Answer 5

You are standing too close to a tree to see the forest. Step back and examine your whole situation. Have somebody older and wiser sit down with the both of you give you the benefit of some wisdom.

Answer 6

An orgasm is a physical as well as an emotional release. If your and your husband are have a rough go at things. it's probably the reason. take a hot bubble bath, take your water proof vibrator with you and fantasize and get yourself off. having a baby rarely affects your ability to have an orgasm.

Answer 7

I had the same thing happen to me, I even went to two doctors to see about it. Not until I saw a counselor did I get it fixed. I can tell you what she suggested and what I did but not on here. I am [e-mail]. IM or e-mail me and I will tell you, to many eyes and ears on answers. Angela.

Answer 8

It is prob because you do not want to. I would not be with anyone who would try to force me to have sex.. How can you have an orgasm with someone that is being controlling and forces you. I would talk to him about it and leave if it gets any worse or before he really hurts you.

Answer 9

I think you need to clear your mind of the kids, the housework, the stress of life, and concentrate on you. If you can let your mind enjoy the sex, your body is sure to follow. Good luck!

Answer 10

Cant Orgasam