I love my baby girl so much. I know she comes on here because she told me I should ask questions here.. Me & my girl have been through so much, but recently I been feeling that I just cant go on in our relationship. I feel that it began to go wrong when she told me a about 10 days ago that she kissed her best male friend. She said that it was an accident, and it happened about 7 months ago at a time when I wasn't there for her (her father had a heart attack) Since then I've had trust issues & shes always had trust issues with me through-out our 15 month relationship. Its made me think differently about the relationship. We argue and at times i want to be with her, at other times I dont. We went on a break & yesterday I told her I dont think I can go on. Its tearing me apart and I cant function. I didnt go to work today because I feel so low and because I cant face the world. We broke up yesterday & I dont know what to do. I love her so much. What do I do? How do I get my mind right?
2006-07-16 22:04:30 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Dont be silly.. go pick her up and take her on vacations! u guys need to relax not to break up! If u love her then be with her!! send her flowers and apologise .. u need to trust each other and i dont think she really meant to kiss that guy..Give another chance to your relationship I think it's worth it.. Do something nice for her and tell her that you really love her and don't want to lose her for anything in this world.. Make a new start based on honesty and forget the past..Now go buy her something nice and write her a loving card!! go go!!
2006-07-16 22:30:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems to me like you know very little about love...
first of all, if you love her so much, why were you not there for her when she needed you? maybe you had a very good reason, maybe not. either way, women are creatures of intense feeling. good reason or not, she needed you and you weren't there. that will hurt forever.
you have trust issues. those are important and need to be worked out if you are ever going to have a relationship. if you can't, then stay away. i don't know what is behind her trust issues with you, but i'd bet whatever the issue was before her father's heart attack, the fact that you failed her then has a lot to do with why she has issues now. trust needs to be earned. she probably trusted you to be more reasonable about a kiss that happened months ago, when she was in emotional turmoil, and which she shared with the guy who was there for her... it was just a kiss. get over it. she probably needed the reasurance that she was important to someone, since undoubtedly she felt she wasn't important enough to you...
i believe that the fact that she told you about this shows that she had resolved her trust issues (or was very close) - she trusted you to understand, to reasure her that you had a good thing going, she trusted you to forgive a moment of weakness. are you so perfect that you can't understand that under such circumstamces she deserved at least a little slack?
what you did, of course, was prove unworthy of her trust... again. i have noticed this about some men... there is a problem that requires attention. you get offended, scream and throw things, walk away. if the game isn't easy, you don't want to play.
first thing you need to do is get some perspective... it was one kiss. one kiss. 7 months ago. when she was emotionally messed up. she did not have an affair, she did not sleep with another guy, she kissed him. hardly constitutes adultery.
you learned of this from her. would you have ever known about it otherwise? shouldn't that mean something?
then if you love her so much, you need to get your act together and start earning that trust you were talking about. so far, it doesn't look to me like you're doing much of a job. back up a few steps, continue to see each other, try to have fun together, without any great expectations on each meeting. hopefully, if you love each other, you will learn to trust.
personally, i hope she falls in love with the best friend.
2006-07-17 05:31:45 · answer #2 · answered by gwenwifar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a personal problem that has to be dealt with before you can deal with anything else. Why would you care if she kissed another person. Kisses are nice to get and receive. Jealousy is a monster that can ruin your life for ever. You say you love her very much gut I doubt that very much. I bet you should use the term lust for her rather than love her. If someone really cares for another then things that bother you would not. You do not trust her at all or you would not be asking these questions. When there is no trust then there is no love. Learn to face yourself and deal with your problems before you even begin to have a good relationship. It may be a good idea to see a counselor about your problems. Using the term baby girl says a lot about how you think. Not mature at all.
2006-07-17 06:43:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it seems that the only thing to do right now is to give each other the space needed to step back and consider your lives separately, and to gather a little perspective. I'm sure you two love each other very much, but sometimes it takes breaking up to really understand how and why you love, and what you can do to change and make things better. also, when you both are ready, TALK it out! If you don't have open communication, there's just no hope of figuring out anything in a positive way. sometimes when things get too complicated and heated, you just need to take a step back in order to move forwards. don't think that you failed and don't think that just because you broke up it means that this is the end, you just have to be patient and listen to what you need in your life to function and be happy, with and/or without her! good luck my man.
2006-07-17 05:11:55 · answer #4 · answered by XsylviaO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i guess id want to know why she has trust issues with you. then id want to know why she kissed her male friend, the real reason. why did she wait 7 months to tell you if it was truly an accident? she could have not told you at all and you'd have been none the wiser and if had been me id have fessed up almost instantly. this on again off again relationship that you have with her, makes it that much harder to trust. also it seems since there are serious trust issues between both of you, those need to be dealt with and cleared up before you two can make this relationship really work!
2006-07-17 05:19:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well her excuse sucks. K her dad had a heart attack so she cheats and kisses her friend. So what happens if something like that happens again your not there so she just jumps in the available bed then blames you for it. Come on. Sometimes when you love someone and they aren't treating you good it's best to move on. The pain isn't worth it. You can love her but if she doesn't love and respect you. You gain nothing from loving her. Move on......
2006-07-17 05:09:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U can not know the people thoroughly, till u do not live together. The amazing thing in friendship is to discover something new from yr partner everyday. If you wait to know her completely and then decide, u have already lost a lot of yr life.
2006-07-17 05:09:26 · answer #7 · answered by manalonedubai 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋