I had been steady with a guy of diff religion & from diff country for 2yrs. At the beginning of our relation,we were very happy together so I overlooked his beliefs and cultures.Then gradually as time passed he started changing.He used to beat me too with abusive languages.That time I was away from home,n hence could not run away from him.There can be two reasons for that...1st that I loved him too deeply.2ndly there was no place to run away from him.
Then I shifted to my native,n he went back to his native saying that he wud come back to take me along.This was 1yr back.This prd was even more reluctant from his side.Then I met another guy over net.N we fell in Love.This guy loves me very much.But the prob is,I still remember the previous guy n sometimes think did I do unjustice to him by saying goodbye?Plz help
2006-07-16 21:59:32 · 23 answers · asked by Some1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
thanks every1 for answering me. I cudnt choose one ans as the best one as all of u are inspiring enuf for me...thanks a lotttt :-)
2006-07-17 03:23:17 · update #1
Girl, u didnt do anything wrong because this relationship was dead from the time he put his hands on you. No man should ever hit a woman regardless of anything. I'm glad you met the other guy and that you are happy. You deserve the best. If ever that Phycho tries to come back into your life, call the police and get a restraining order
2006-07-16 22:03:46 · answer #1 · answered by Carpe Diem 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey - you must let this go. Is your not wanting to let go really love, or is it bad consience for not saying goodbye? You will be way better off with a guy your own culture. Think of having children together: which religion should they have? what if he use violent means to raise them - as he hit you that time? who should get to decide? what about divorce? who should take care of children? No, we have seen alot of tragic stories over the years. Sadly enough.
If you need to tell the first that you are not actually interested in him coming to get you, write him a letter and put it very nicely. Don't tell him about the new guy or trig any jealusy.
2006-07-16 22:06:23 · answer #2 · answered by Tones 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing, the first one was an abusive relationship, it would only have got worse if you had stayed with him. One of the traits of people who have been abused is that they want to go back to the abuser to get the approval they thought they did not get. You are feeling this now. Know it and let it go. If you are in love with the current guy, and he treats you well, go with it and forget the past. That is why its called the past.
2006-07-16 22:05:15 · answer #3 · answered by Pete 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would you rather 1. be beaten up and abused by someone who lied to you and is of a different religion or 2. Stay with a guy you love and loves you back (very much). Just stop and litsen to yourself think. HE is the one who did you Injustice. He used you beat you then lied to you and left you. WAKE UP FROM YOUR SLUMBER.
2006-07-16 22:10:40 · answer #4 · answered by Ycul72 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, u din't do any wrong. u were not happy. and beating/ abusing is not good for a healthy realtionship.
what can b understood is tht u din't run away from him previously as u had no option. bt now whn u were not happy with him and u have a better option...there is nothing wrong in what u did
time will help u to forget him...
all d best..
2006-07-16 22:08:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are very innocent with no common sense , pl go ahead and enjoy with your new love , forget old selfish man , don't repeat the same , if he is from other reliegion , think 100 time before commit anything furthur , relax and take smart deciesion .
2006-07-16 22:06:21 · answer #6 · answered by your noon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like your better off out of that relationship, and stick to the guy who loves you for you!!
violence is not the key and not any kind of foundation for a relationship, whether you love him or not!!
just think if you ever had children by this man, would you like them beaten too?
this man who you love and loves you back sounds like the one for you - breaking up is hard to do but worth it in the end - it will take time, but you both will get over it, and be a stronger set of people for it too.
Good Luck
2006-07-16 22:04:24 · answer #7 · answered by schmushe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to do away with the past already. i'm sure you can still feel the pain sometimes but you need not to dwell on the past. the guy you've met now can be the savior you've always waited for. if all else fails, there's online dating for you,sister. i've never stopped video chatting on webdate*com since i started.
2006-07-17 00:04:37 · answer #8 · answered by trixy a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how on earth could u imagine that?? this only means that u got used to the abusive relationship....go ahead with ur life and start a new hopefully happy page with ur new love... no pain over the past:)
2006-07-16 22:10:31 · answer #9 · answered by Nectar80 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi Sister.....Am only 22 years previous...yet i think of i could desire to respond to your question...Nd don think of that am too youthful to respond to your question. mutually as seeing your message it is only sparkling which you thoroughly sense depressed and function inferiority complicated. If u the two r certainly loving then why u r bothering approximately your exterior splendor. Don think of which you're too fat. Even various the slender females replace into fat as quickly as they get married. exterior beauties will stay to tell the story for short era yet inner splendor will stay perpetually. certainly he can persuade his mum and dad and you besides could may lead them to love you thru your being concerned. As you pronounced that u won't be able to settle for everyone than him then how could desire to you depart him...in case you depart him as quickly as, then u will sense ur relax of the existence as hell. Please throw your undesirable thoughts out and take a steps forward to marry him quickly..all the final Sister...
2016-11-02 05:03:12 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋