my husband drinks alot and when he does we tend to argue a lot and sometimes it get physical. Can I ever change him?
2006-07-16 21:51:53 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No,he can only change if he wants to.All you can do is tell him how you feel & hope he cares.If he does'nt,leave.
2006-07-16 22:02:56 · answer #1 · answered by Troy 5 · 7⤊ 1⤋
You cannot change another person. You can only change yourself and your own personal situation. You could try intervention, AA meetings, Rehab programs, or take him to the Emergency room. But if these things do not work, you need to ask yourself "if things do not change in the next 5 years, can I deal with this?" If the answer is no, think about what changes you need to make for yourself and give yourself a time frame and work towards your goals.
2006-07-17 10:25:51 · answer #2 · answered by Erica, AKA Stretch 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, my boyfriend is the same way, they will not change unless they really want to, but then even then that takes a long hard road to be able to change. So unless he thinks there is a problem, he will stay the same and not change. Also you don't deserve to be in a relationship that is physically violent. Good luck!
2006-07-17 04:56:49 · answer #3 · answered by Stacey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you can change him if you know what really drives him to drink. The arguments and aftermath is the aftereffects of alcohol. First find why he drinks and try to console on the nerve issue. I've seen lot comeout of the habit if assessed properly. May be you can take help from rehab centres. If you cann't solve your problem others advice will drive you crazy.
2006-07-17 05:08:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should try an intervention.
But why would you want to be with anyone that harms you physically, intoxicated or not it is not right.
I watched my mother get physically abused, and there is no way I can ever let that happen.
Try an intervention and then rehab and lots of counseling.
2006-07-17 04:55:24 · answer #5 · answered by lalala 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my dear i was in the same possition a few years back, but i was not married have a daughter and have put up the the crap for seven years all because of the child, but guest what my daughter was more hurt seeing me being physical asulted by his father than leaving without him today.
Beleave me it is a big set back in your life when you are in such possition.
Today i am happy, have been promoted in my work all because i have a clear mind and more concentrations.
2006-07-17 05:07:33 · answer #6 · answered by Annie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, No you can't change him! But you can change yourself! Get out of the abusive relationship! Real men don't get physical! Good luck!
2006-07-17 04:56:50 · answer #7 · answered by wittster 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO, i was with a man for three years and he was addicted to drugs i did the best and what was in my power to help him .He only changed when he realized he had a problem to bad we weren't together anymore
2006-07-17 07:32:38 · answer #8 · answered by chunkybaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think, so maybe you could take his money that he spends it with or threaten to him that you will call the police but just say it threaten him he might stop and if he doesn't then there no chance him stoping i know it sucks having someone you love getting drunk nearly every night and then he has arguments with some1 oh well I'm not saying to much i hope it works for you and take care
2006-07-17 05:00:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think so. He could've change when he knows that ur not happy with what he's doing. YOU need to change the situation by get rid of him or do something to open his eyes.
2006-07-17 04:56:40 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need professional help. you should not put up with physical abuse. It is very difficult to change an alcoholic unless he wants to change himself.
2006-07-17 05:33:10 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋