My g/friends 14y/o son has staying with up for about week & I've just caught him doing something wrong.?

Question

He was in the bathroom masturbating over a gay magazine (he told me that his older friend bought it for him).
I asked him if he was gay & he told me he wasn't sure but he had done it with a girl 4 doors down the street & didn't like it. He said that he'd most probably try it with his friend to see if he liked it with guys.
Should I tell his mother ? or ring his dad (who I get on with) in Gosford ?
I think if I tell his mum she'll be heartbroken but if I talk to his dad we might be able to both talk to him (robbie) about this problem.
I don't dislike gay men as long as they don't try to turn me.
My cousin was gay (he tried to join priesthood but got rejected) , he died several years ago from a drug overdose.

Answer 1

MYOB

Answer 2

You have to tell BOTH of them. They need to be aware that their young son is sexually active! They BOTH need to have a talk with him about ALL of the aspects of sex, and the responsibility that goes along with it! If the child is being approached by another male, then there is a good chance that the boy that has given him this publication could be a victim of sexual abuse. In America, when sexual predators come after young boys they find their bodies in a ditch! This needs to be looked into and the child and his companions and where he goes must be monitored more closely. He's 14 NOT 40!

Come on, you are dating this boy's mother, and that means that one day he could look to you for answers if things should become serious between his mother and you! Either way you care about this CHILD, right? You must tell BOTH parents. When the child's mother finds out that you did not feel comfortable talking to her about her own son, I think she is going to be angry. You are on the spot, this child is too young to be having sex with anybody, male or female. (That is my opinion) If you withhold this information then something bad happens to the CHILD before you and his father have a chance to "talk" to him, then you will be partially responsible. Can you live with something like that? Tell his mother, bust him, and tell him it's for his own good that was what the authority figures in my life always did! You know what? I managed to avoid some real danger because some people did care enough about me to TELL!

This is not some dirty little secret that you and this boy share. Do not become complicit or a conspirator in his secret bi-curious sex life. AT 14, YOU MUST KNOW HE IS TOO YOUNG TO BE HAVING SEX WITH ANYONE!

This is my opinion, and good luck. She may be heartbroken now, but don't you think that is better than seeing her young son become involved with a child molester? PLEASE TELL ON HIM FOR HIS OWN GOOD! THIS CANNOT WAIT UNTIL TOMORROW!

Children his age are abducted from all over the world, and sold to old perverse men who have a yen for their type! Yes, you have to tell. This is a real big wicked world now, and you have to be careful with children when they begin to go about unsupervised.
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*Some of these answers on here are SHOCKING! We all wail and gnash our teeth wondering why there is so many child molesters, and WHY OH WHY they murder or abduct their victims! This is the reason, "oh it's normal", "oh don't say anything"...yes, EXACTLY THE REASON! The secret kept today is the missing child sold into sexual slavery tomorrow or the body found buried along with 27 or more bodies of other young boys in John Wayne Gacy's crawl space! Adults have to take some responsibility, to protect their children! THIS IS ABOUT SO MUCH MORE THAN JUST "BEING GAY".

If he grows up gay and happy, that is one thing if someone steals him or kills him at 14, it's entirely different, people!!! Just damn!

Answer 3

I really think you should encourage the boy to discuss it with his parents. Tell him that it's something that he really shouldn't try till he's older. Sex with anyone (male or female) isn't something a 14yo should be doing.
Tell him that he can always talk to you about it though, and be honest and open with him. Also let him know that any sort of sex should be protected sex. Advise him of the dangers of unprotected sex.
I don't think that its something that you should be telling his Mum and Dad. Let him tell them himselves. His Mum might be upset, but if she really loves her son, and it is men that he's attracted to, she will accept him for who he is.
Ultimately though, he probably is too young to know what he wants just yet. A lot of kids in their early teens go through the same confusion about their sexuality.
Please give him lots of support and try not to judge him.
Good luck.
PS Gay men are not usually in the habit of trying to turn straight men...

Answer 4

I think you ought to talk to one of his parents at least, and, from your analysis, probably his dad.

But I think you should let him have his try. He may not like it with his friend either, so you can start clear and tell him that not liking it once doesn't mean he won't ever like it.
Besides, if you stop him now, he will try again a couple of years later, or secretly, and then it will be so much sweeter for him, as any forbidden fruit.

Answer 5

the hardest part is knowing about it . but at his age he may only be experimenting with his own sexuality if you go making a big fuss about it he may just turn away from his whole family.but then again he could be under pressure from his friend to give it a go.the way I would deal with it if it was one of my boys would be to see just how far he may be willing to take it and then just be there for him in case he needed some good friendly advice or a shoulder to lean or cry on.

Answer 6

Who's to say what he was doing was wrong?

I would keep the info to myself and tell him that whatever he is feeling is all normal for his age and to take it day by day.

I think it's strange more than anything that he told you "his older Friend" bought him the mag. Who's this friend?

Answer 7

just have an ear available when /if he needs it. Keep and ear out for his "friend" who bought him the mag. You will probably catch some heat if mom finds out you knew.and did nothing. But the best help is to be understanding.

Answer 8

The most traumatizing thing in the world can be to figure out "who you are sexually." If you do the wrong thing it can scar him for the rest of his life. It isn't going to be up to his dad or his mom who he will be ... it will be up to him. Let him figure it out. No one can "fix him." Wether it is right or wrong in your opinion ... it is his life and his for the figuring out. In my experience without any traumas some boys just pass right through the stage of being excited by everything and turn out "normal" if you let them be.

Answer 9

Id leave it alone for now.. he's 14 and could just be expirementing with idea's rather then actually that he's gay .. i think u need to just let him deal with it for now, so he can find himself with out feeling embarrassed or ridiculed.. bad enough u know.. id leave it alone for now and hope its just a phase..

Answer 10

I dont think u should tell anyone. maybe a therapist if you cant get over it. but its his problem. let him figure it out on his own. @ least he cant get anyone pregnant if he does it with a guy. but all im saying is that if hes straight hes straight. if hes gay hes gay. if hes bi hes bi. but no one can figure it out 4 him. oh &, its not really a problem. if you need any more help. my yahoo id is [e-mail].

Answer 11

This is the time, let him enjoy, Think what u have done at this age in the past.